EP. 309 — Morbius LIVE!

Paul Scheer [00:00:01] When Dr. Morbius meets Doctor Who, it’s Morbin Time! We saw Morbius, so you know what that means. 

Intro Song [00:00:11] [Intro Song]

Paul Scheer [00:01:08] Hello, people of Earth! And hello, people of Chicago! We are live at the Chicago Theater and we are so excited to talk about a movie that changed a generation. Some say it might be the best Marvel affiliated film ever. Technically, not a Marvel film because I’ve never seen that weird title above Marvel before. “In association” It’s like we live next door to Marvel. But if you need to know the plot of Morbius, it’s uh, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Vampire. I don’t know. It’s a weird story about a man who doesn’t have the right DNA, but vampire bats do. I think we learned a lot of bad things about vampire bats that aren’t true. And if you’re looking for something scary, don’t worry. You won’t find it here. Surprisingly, in the hour and 48 minutes of this film, not much happens. But we are going to break it down tonight with my co-host. Please welcome Mr. Jason Mantzoukas. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:02:29] What’s up jerks?! How we doing, Chicago?! That’s what I’m talking about. Give it up balcony! Here we are. I need to watch Morbius? Question mark? 

Paul Scheer [00:02:50] We definitely watched Morbius. That is a true statement. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:02:54] Yesterday, you said something that I will say I put into effect today, which is you admitted that you watched some things– 

Paul Scheer [00:03:02] Yes. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:03:03] –at a faster speed. 

Paul Scheer [00:03:04] 100%. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:03:05] And I was like, yikes, that sounds like a great idea. So I started doing it on Morbius earlier today. 

Paul Scheer [00:03:13] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:03:14] Okay. There is so much slow mo in this movie that I was like, “What’s going on?” Because sometimes it would be like normal. And then sometimes they’re like [gibberish] and then I’d try to mess with it. And inadvertently, I watched like 15 minutes of the movie at .75. I made it longer. I watched this movie for longer than you did. 

Paul Scheer [00:03:43] I don’t understand why you can go below the normal speed. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:03:50] If you really want to drink it in. 

Paul Scheer [00:03:51] Occasionally I will make that mistake in an audio book and I’m like, “Come on, get to the point.” And then I realize it’s my mistake. But no, I watch this in real speed. For How Did This Get Made, I don’t fuck around. I watch it in the right aspect ratio. I rent out a theater. I sit there by myself. I do all the research, you know, I watch these all in the real speed. But you know what? I was upset because I love watching Marvel movies. I love those films, and I know I only have a few chances to get June on board with those. And this is where I wasted that. But let’s hear it from her. Please welcome my other cohost, June Diane Raphael! 

Paul Scheer [00:04:38] Welcome, June. 

June Diane Raphael [00:04:40] Hi, Paul. How are you? 

Paul Scheer [00:04:41] I’m well, thank you. How are you? 

June Diane Raphael [00:04:42] Good. I love this movie. 

Paul Scheer [00:04:47] Wow. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:04:49] What on earth is happening? 

June Diane Raphael [00:04:51] I enjoyed it. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:04:52] Black it out. Shows over. 

June Diane Raphael [00:04:54] I enjoyed it quite a bit. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:04:56] It was weird. The final episode of the How Did This Get Made podcast was only one and a half minutes long. 

Paul Scheer [00:05:02] Chicago saw historic podcast in the making. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:05:06] June had a take so hot we had to wrap the podcast. 

Paul Scheer [00:05:09] But you know what? I’m happy to hear you say that. And I will say, I don’t know if it’s the fact that we’ve been on tour and we’ve watched so many bad movies. 

June Diane Raphael [00:05:16] Yeah, we’re not well. 

Paul Scheer [00:05:17] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:05:17] I mean, if we’re going to compare this to Oogieloves. 

Paul Scheer [00:05:22] This one went down easy. 

June Diane Raphael [00:05:24] So easy. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:05:25] I do agree with that. 

Paul Scheer [00:05:26] So Morbius is, you know, is a grand film. You know, it spans a quarter of a century. You know, we’re following these characters from 25 years ago all the way to the present. I mean, I just love– Jason as a comic book fan. You know, I think that you probably feel like what? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:05:46] I’ve been waiting for Morbius, the living vampire, to enter our cinematic universe. I haven’t been. This is a character I don’t care about. Morbius, the living Vampire, is like a also ran Spider-Man, kind of a good guy, bad guy, kind of in that category that I’m not I’m not even that familiar with. 

Paul Scheer [00:06:08] I mean, he’s part daredevil. Right? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:06:11] Yes. All the echolocation stuff, all that. I can hear everything. 

Paul Scheer [00:06:14] He’s part Spider-Man, which we kind of address because he got bit or he is put the blood in whatever. And then, I would say this movie makes him mostly Batman, like the fact that he doesn’t call himself Batman upset me. Like you are using bats to attack. Don’t just use your doctor name. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:06:35] It’s his real name.

June Diane Raphael [00:06:39] Well, but I would never, I would never go to a doctor whose last name was Morbius. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:06:44] Yeah. Never. 

June Diane Raphael [00:06:47] But see, approaching the movie with no knowledge because I think I asked you, Paul, at one point, Is this Batman? 

Paul Scheer [00:06:53] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:06:54] Am I watching Batman? 

June Diane Raphael [00:06:57] Is this sort of another version, like another kind of take on Batman’s origin story? And I don’t know much about any of these gentlemen, Batman, Spider man, but Batman’s origin story, like I do know. 

Paul Scheer [00:07:09] Yeah. Which is? 

June Diane Raphael [00:07:11] Well, he sees his parents get slaughtered in an alley. 

Paul Scheer [00:07:13] Okay, great. Wow, okay. 

June Diane Raphael [00:07:15] Yeah, I do know that. I know that. But I would recommend another viewing, erasing all of the comics you’ve read and just approaching it anew. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:07:29] Well don’t do it like this, erasing, erasing all the comics you read. 

June Diane Raphael [00:07:34] And just approaching it like it’s a brand new thing. 

Paul Scheer [00:07:38] Yeah. 

June Diane Raphael [00:07:38] And you might enjoy it. Paul, you did enjoy this movie, by the way. 

Paul Scheer [00:07:42] I said I enjoyed it. I was surprised. Look, is it a good movie? No. But it is competently made in parts. But also nothing happens. Like it’s a weird thing. It’s a perfect rainy day movie to watch on, like a channel that plays like, mostly like Two and a Half Men reruns. Like. Like well, that’s the only chance they get. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:08:09] What channel is that and are you watching it? 

Paul Scheer [00:08:11] I mean, isn’t that what TBS is now? 

June Diane Raphael [00:08:13] CBS, yeah. 

Paul Scheer [00:08:14] TBS is pretty much that. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:08:17] Two and a Half Men and Morbius?

June Diane Raphael [00:08:20] I could see it. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:08:21] Morbius posits a world in which you want to know what the coolest thing is in 2022? Bullet time. We did this already. We “I could see the bullet coming and dodge it.” That’s the Matrix. Come on. 

Paul Scheer [00:08:36] To me, the best thing about Morbius simply was his doctor’s outfit, which looked like a very high class chef outfit. Like, I’ve never seen a doctor that has, like, a button around the neck. He looked like a priest doctor chef. 

June Diane Raphael [00:08:52] I was so obsessed with his lab because they are doing clinical trials there for at least one patient. Anna. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:09:01] Yeah, she’s in there. 

June Diane Raphael [00:09:04] Anna is in there and I guess maybe still currently in a coma. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:09:08] My assumption, my assumption is she’ll be in a coma forever. 

June Diane Raphael [00:09:14] It’s really tough because I spent the entire movie and the two post-credits scenes thinking, “When will we take this vial to Anna or wake her up?” 

Paul Scheer [00:09:23] Well, this is interesting because I’ve forgot a big part of this movie. There is a moment where the King of Sweden gives him an award, right? 

June Diane Raphael [00:09:31] The Nobel Prize. 

Paul Scheer [00:09:33] The Nobel Prize. So he gets the Nobel Prize. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:09:35] Wait, does he get the Nobel Prize? 

June Diane Raphael [00:09:38] Yes! He created artificial blood. Of course he did. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:09:41] You know what? I think it was happening so slow on my screen that I wasn’t processing it. 

June Diane Raphael [00:09:47] You couldn’t help but to miss it at that point. 

Paul Scheer [00:09:49] It is said so quickly because it is a quick cut to the Nobel Prize. Anyway, we’re back in the lab and like wait, wait. Well, we just traversed 25 years. Then we go forward to synthetic blood and then we’re back in– like there’s so much going on, but synthetic blood seems like, Isn’t that healing you? Isn’t that working. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:10:08] But it’s for shorter and shorter periods. 

Paul Scheer [00:10:11] Only after he got bit by the vampire bat. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:10:14] Oh, I’m sorry. Yes, I think he’s looking for a cure. Like a full blown cure. And I don’t think synthetic blood is it. 

Paul Scheer [00:10:22] So that’s like insulin for him. It’s not curing it. I have to do– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:10:26] Something more drastic. 

June Diane Raphael [00:10:28] The thing that’s tricky is I believe and I’m sure someone’s going to shout it out, but I believe that that artificial blood is impacting the world in a huge way. Right? Tyrese said later on that it saved him in the battlefield. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:10:43] Guys, Tyrese is in this fucking movie. 

June Diane Raphael [00:10:44] Doing great work. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:10:48] Thank God. When Tyrese showed up, I wrote “Thank God, Tyrese is here.” 

Paul Scheer [00:10:54] And then when Tyrese ceases to be funny, I’m like, “Oh no, why Tyrese? Why did they take the funny guy?” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:11:02] All I wanted was for him to be his character from Fast and Furious. 

Paul Scheer [00:11:06] Yeah. He’s like “Are you telling me you got vampire blood in your body?” Like, No, he’s just dead serious. But in the trailer or one of the trailers, there’s multiple trailers with extra scenes. Tyrese does take off a jacket and reveal a robotic arm. 

June Diane Raphael [00:11:23] Oh. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:11:26] Okay. The balcony needs to chill out. I know that’s hard because you’re in the balcony and you’re already most of you pissing your pants. 

Paul Scheer [00:11:39] But yes, Tyrese’s character, there are multiple reshoots here. Tyrese’s character did have a robotic arm, so I feel like they also were trying to show something there, which makes sense. Because when Tyrese is chasing Dr. Morbius, and I’ll call him by his doctor name, Dr. Morbius.  

Jason Mantzoukas [00:11:58] I call him Mike. 

Paul Scheer [00:11:58] He manages to get to the top of the building as quick as Morbius and Morbius did [pew pew noises]. Like Morbius flew up there bouncing off the walls, and Tyrese got up there real quick with the wind. What happened with the wind? 

June Diane Raphael [00:12:12] Oh, my gosh. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:12:14] What is that wind? In the subway tunnel as well. 

Paul Scheer [00:12:20] I get the subway tunnel because I feel like that’s the subway tunnel pushing the wind forward. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:12:26] I agree with you. But it happens on a rooftop. 

June Diane Raphael [00:12:29] I thought it was just a windy day. And once you’re up there, I think what was happening was, you know, he’s constantly trying to– Morbius– trying to understand what his body can do.  

Jason Mantzoukas [00:12:50] Like what his power set is. 

June Diane Raphael [00:12:50] Yes, what his power set is because he’s adjusting to– this where I like the movie– he’s adjusting to not only being, you know, out of the prison of his illness and feeling good, but actually feeling like more than good, which is superhero level. Now, where I think there was a missed opportunity. 

Paul Scheer [00:13:09] He’s feeling Morbin good. 

June Diane Raphael [00:13:11] What’d you say? 

Paul Scheer [00:13:12] He’s feeling Morbin good. 

June Diane Raphael [00:13:16] I thought where we were going– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:13:19] So you’re saying Morbin good? 

Paul Scheer [00:13:22] Morbin good. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:13:23] Got it. Got it.

June Diane Raphael [00:13:26] I wish we had seen him think he was a superhero or had superpowers before he actually did, because he spent his life afflicted by a very serious illness. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:13:41] I see. You would have thought he had superpowers or just was healthy? 

June Diane Raphael [00:13:46] Well, he doesn’t have a barometer of what it feels like to be healthy ever. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:13:50] That’s what I’m saying. I would love it if we had a scene where he’s like, “I did it. I’m healthy.” And live in the real world before he, like, turns into a bloodsucking vampire and murders a bunch of people. 

June Diane Raphael [00:14:00] Either way, I just think that was such a– because the heart of the story I actually think is really compelling. They just didn’t really do anything with it, you know? But I think it was happening with the wind anyway. To go back to the wind on the rooftop. I think what was happening was that it was simply just a windy day and we were watching a man with super powers brace himself to not get thrown off by the wind. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:14:27] I think what it is and I think this is what it is, but I don’t think it’s successful or I think it’s too confusing. I think what it is, is he now, one of the elements of his powers set now is that he can fly and he yet doesn’t know it. But his body is processing air currents everywhere. 

Paul Scheer [00:14:48] Well can I tell you why? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:14:49] So that he can fly because bats are blind and they fly off of the air or whatever. 

Paul Scheer [00:14:54] I thought that when he has this blood, he gets hollow bones. Like a bat. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:15:04] Sorry Paul. We didn’t get that. Can you repeat it? I’m so sorry. What now? 

Paul Scheer [00:15:12] I believe. And scientists in the audience– I know there’s a lot– back me up. I believe that– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:15:17] You think scientists are in the balcony? 

June Diane Raphael [00:15:20] On a Sunday night? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:15:22] If you’re a scientist and you’re in the balcony, you’re not a scientist. 

Paul Scheer [00:15:27] I believe that vampire bats or bats in general have hollow bones, am I right? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:15:33] And birds. Birds have hollow bones. 

Paul Scheer [00:15:36] Birds. Same difference. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:15:36] Well, Birdman is in this. 

Paul Scheer [00:15:40] Yes. 

June Diane Raphael [00:15:41] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:15:42] Wait so you thought that the wind was because his bones were now hollow? 

Paul Scheer [00:15:47] Yeah, because he’s lighter. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:15:50] Well, then we’re kind of saying the same thing because I don’t think it’s that he’s. Wouldn’t it have been amazing if he gets bitten by the vampire. And of all the transformations you see, you watch the marrow get sucked out of all of his bones. 

Paul Scheer [00:16:04] That’s what’s trailing him whenever he jumps up. That’s bone marrow. 

June Diane Raphael [00:16:08] That’s bone marrow? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:16:10] No, I think it’s his– I think he is–

Paul Scheer [00:16:13] Look, because bat bones are hollow, allowing them to be light enough to fly, they’re unable to produce the B cells needed for immune function in their bone marrow like other mammals. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:16:25] Oh, so they’re unable to combat viruses. 

Paul Scheer [00:16:29] Yes. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:16:30] Okay, So now I have a new set of problems. Without that marrow, baby, they are prone to viruses. This guy is riddled with virus. No, my thing is, I think the first time on the rooftop, it happens. The wind is blowing. It’s just the wind. But they’re visualizing it because he’s like, “What the fuck is this wind?” The same way they’re trying to visualize “I can hear across town?” They’re trying to visualize all of these bat specifics, these bat senses. 

Paul Scheer [00:17:03] I also think that his hearing is bullshit because he seems to selectively cancel out the entire city. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:17:10] Yeah. 

Paul Scheer [00:17:11] Unless it’s like, “Oh, I can hear down the hall in this one minute.” Like the nurses killed. What happened to the nurse when she was killed? Oh, shit. What happened? Like, you would think he couldn’t sleep because the noise would be constant. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:17:23] What’s wonderful about Daredevil’s power is when he gets them as a child, is that when he loses his sight and all of his other senses because he’s gets toxic waste dumped on him and all of his other senses heighten. He’s almost driven insane by the amount of input he’s now getting. He can hear– it’s a cacophony of sounds that he cannot control. We never see Morbius struggle with his body. He is like, “Wait, I could fly, I can do anything. I’m awesome. I’m immediately incredible at this. Done. I’m Leto. Get to work. You need me to be jacked, Leto? Okay. I need to be skinny in one scene, and then I’m full blown jacked leto.” Carry me around set, but I’m jacked. 

June Diane Raphael [00:18:06] I loved it. 

Paul Scheer [00:18:07] He literally plays one game of handball, just one. And he’s got it. Figured it out. Got my powers down like he nails it. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:18:14] And he’s not even playing the game. He’s just tossing a ball. And he’s like, “Can I do this? Yup. I guess I’m a fucking cool ass vampire, but not the kind that’s not cool with the sun.” 

Paul Scheer [00:18:28] Well, the big issue that I had in the beginning was his love interest. Martine. You know, she comes in and it feels like she’s catching him in the act. “What are you doing?” And then proceeds to knock on a giant tube in the middle of his office full of bats. He’s not hiding the bat work. Like, she presents. Like, “I know you’re working on something secretive.” Ting, ting, ting. [bat noises]. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:18:55] You know what there should have been? There should have been an administrator. Somebody who is like, “I don’t like these bats in here. I don’t like what you’re up to. I don’t like your long hair. I don’t like your too trimmed, too dark beard for someone your age. There’s definitely gray in there. You are not a doctor, sir. You are Jared Leto.” 

Paul Scheer [00:19:23] I will say this. Jared Leto did say he did not have to do method acting for this role because and this is a true quote, Dr. Morbius and him share a similar personality. 

June Diane Raphael [00:19:40] Okay. That’s really interesting because one of the reasons why I really love this movie, obviously, is because of Jared Leto, but also I found him to be so watchable. 

Paul Scheer [00:19:50] I loved him in this. 

June Diane Raphael [00:19:51] I loved him. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:19:53] I mean, I thought Jared Leto was fine, but to me, Matt Smith is absolutely devouring this movie. This is the performance. Matt Smith is where I’m at. 

Paul Scheer [00:20:10] Okay. Hold on one second. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:20:11] Give me an entire movie about Matt Smith, stat. That’s a medical term. 

Paul Scheer [00:20:18] Hold on. All you Doctor Who nerds take that out of the equation. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:20:23] Yeah. Doctor Who! Yay! 

Paul Scheer [00:20:26] He just started watching it. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:20:29] I’m still in Christopher Eccleston. 

Paul Scheer [00:20:32] Matt Smith has no reason. He has nothing. Why does he all of a sudden be like, “Yeah, it’s fucking kill everybody.” Like, the synthetic blood is working for him and he’s like, “Fuck it, now I want to eat people.” Like he has no– he’s like, “Yeah, we can cover up dead bodies. It’s easy.” 

June Diane Raphael [00:20:51] I think what the movie is going for, or one thing that’s coming through is how we treat disabled people. I’m serious. And so I did feel like, oh, I do understand that the world has not been set up or adjustments have not been made for someone like Matt Smith to live with his illness successfully in the world. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:21:15] We seen him get bullied and beat up as a child. 

Paul Scheer [00:21:19] But then he’s hiring bodyguards because he’s ripping off the mob. 

June Diane Raphael [00:21:21] Yes, but one of his body guards also refers to Dr. Morbius as a cripple when he’s letting him into Matt Smith’s apartment. 

Paul Scheer [00:21:30] Okay. 

June Diane Raphael [00:21:30] So I do think what’s happening to Matt Smith is that he can no longer take being disabled in America. 

Paul Scheer [00:21:38] Got it. And so he wants to eat them and drink their blood. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:21:41] Or in the world, because I’m pretty sure he’s first treated in Greece. And I wrote, “Hang on. Is anybody Greek?” Is somebody in this movie supposed to be Greek? Is Jared Harris supposed to be Greek? Is the clinic Greek? Is Morbius Greek? Is anybody supposed to be Greek? Why is– 

Paul Scheer [00:22:06] Isn’t Morbius a Greek name? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:22:08] Yes, of course. [Speaks in Greek]  

June Diane Raphael [00:22:19] I think it was during a time where it was like Mediterranean air can cure anything. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:22:23] I feel like Jared Leto was like, “I want to go to Greece for this.” 

Paul Scheer [00:22:28] But just for one scene. Here’s my question, though, and I’m asking is very honestly, because their movie leaves a lot to the viewer to connect dots. But Matt Smith is doing well with the synthetic blood. 

June Diane Raphael [00:22:42] Well, listen, even though they’re surviving on the synthetic blood, there’s nothing like the red stuff. You know, we know that there’s nothing like that red stuff. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:22:50] He wants to eat dinner at a red sauce place, if you know what I mean. Here’s the thing. And we understand why and I think that for Jared Leto, for Morbius, he is doggedly pursuing a cure. He is chasing, he is a scientist, he is a doctor. He is chasing a cure. Matt Smith’s want is to dance. He cannot dance. You know what he’s not doing with synthetic blood? Dancing. The guy needs to move. 

Paul Scheer [00:23:23] I mean they really do recreate that scene from Spider-Man 3 with Tobey Maguire there. 

June Diane Raphael [00:23:35] I wish we knew more about Anna’s parents and just what kind of waivers they had to sign to get her treatment and to get her a spot in this deal. Clinical trials at New Horizons. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:23:49] You think Anna’s parents were ever, like, by her bedside, like, “Oh, Anna. Okay, okay.” And then were like, “Okay, we’re leaving now.” Walks past giant plexiglass full of bats. Do you think they’re ever like, “What is this treatment? Should we take her to a regular hospital?” 

June Diane Raphael [00:24:06] Even if they had never seen the bats, the lighting in that facility.

Jason Mantzoukas [00:24:13] Okay. 

June Diane Raphael [00:24:14] Nah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:24:15] Okay. Not only the lighting in the facility, the lighting in the facility is on the same timer system as episode one of Guillermo del Toro’s Cabinet of Curiosites, the Tim Blake Nelson episode where that lighting that timer may it is in a storage facility. This is a high tech hospital. The nurses killed and is dead on the floor all night into the next day. What?

Paul Scheer [00:24:42] Well, to me, I thought it was one of those lights like, you know, if you stay still in the bathroom too long, the light will go off and you have to wave your hand. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:24:52] Ugh those are the worst. 

Paul Scheer [00:24:54] I hate it. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:24:54] When you get to a certain age and you realize, “Oh, no, I now shit longer than the movement timer. This is not good. I’m old. How is there still some left?”

Paul Scheer [00:25:10] I thought. I thought that it was on movement. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:25:13] Just when I thought I was out. It pulls me back in. 

June Diane Raphael [00:25:16] Okay. 

Paul Scheer [00:25:19] But I thought it was on movement lights. But it wasn’t because she runs to the end of the hall. And then there’s a lone light switch that turns on all the lights. It’s so odd. 

June Diane Raphael [00:25:30] I actually enjoyed that sequence. I thought it was very scary. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:25:33] It’s a great device. 

June Diane Raphael [00:25:34] It was very, very scary. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:25:36] And it is used so much better in the Guillermo del Toro thing. 

Paul Scheer [00:25:40] But I will say this once again, the the patient, Anna, literally is attached to the laboratory like it does feel like. What other care is she getting there? It seems like people are going home. 

June Diane Raphael [00:25:55] That’s why I want to know what the situation is. Because if you’re part of a clinical trial, I do think she needs to be admitted to a hospital. And I guess, I mean, to me, a lab is the lab in the hospital is a hospital. 

Paul Scheer [00:26:11] Morbius is barely there. 

June Diane Raphael [00:26:12] Yeah, I know. I know. 

Paul Scheer [00:26:15] He puts her into– the last we see, he’s like (shrugs) “Put her into a coma.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:26:20] I have a question. I have a question. 

June Diane Raphael [00:26:21] Never wakes her up. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:26:24] Some things– and some of this might just be the movie doesn’t answer these questions but– and some of it might be because I watched it on a bunch of various speeds. So Jared Harris is running the Greek clinic where boy Morbius meets boy Matt Smith. Okay. 

Paul Scheer [00:26:45] Yes. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:26:46] He then calls him Milo for the rest of the movie. Is his name Lucian? 

Paul Scheer [00:26:52] Yes. 

June Diane Raphael [00:26:52] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:26:54] Right? 

Paul Scheer [00:26:55] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:26:55] So his name is Lucian. It’s just this thing where Morbius calls everybody Milo. And he’s like, “You don’t have an identity except for the one I give you. Your new Milo.” 

Paul Scheer [00:27:05] But he also then says, “I don’t even remember the first Milo.” So it’s not even in like, Oh, I love that Milo news take away. I don’t even remember, but– 

June Diane Raphael [00:27:16] I assumed that you too would know the answers to this. And I could get some information here. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:27:21] I think he’s just saying “You’re just another Milo that’ll die soon. Who cares? This movie’s about me. Morbius the living vampire.” And oh, wait, now because I fixed your dialysis machine or whatever the machine was with a ballpoint pen. Who is he? Forge? That’s for the comic book nerds! 

Paul Scheer [00:27:47] But by the way–. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:27:48] Forge could make anything. He’s a machinist. He could build anything out of anything. Is Morbius the same? What is his mutant power? 

Paul Scheer [00:27:55] When Morbius fixes that with a pen spring, Jared Harris is like, “You’re smart. I’m going to send you to science school.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:28:04] Well, here’s my question. He says there is a school in New York for gifted youngsters, which sounds a lot like Xavier Academy to me. And I was like, are these motherfuckers trying to introduce the X-Men in Morbius? I will straight up kill myself if this is how this happens. 

June Diane Raphael [00:28:27] Again, I didn’t take any of this baggage into my viewing. And I just enjoyed it. 

Paul Scheer [00:28:33] But I do feel like at one point. Look, he calls everybody Milo. But then when he saves Lucian’s life, you would think he goes, “I’m not gonna call you Milo anymore. I’m gonna call you Lucian.” And then he doesn’t. And then so much so that later in the movie he’s like, “I got to save Milo.” It’s like you don’t even know his name. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:28:53]  Everybody calls him Milo. 

Paul Scheer [00:28:54] I know. 

June Diane Raphael [00:28:54] Well he calls himself Milo. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:28:57] And and other people call him– Bix from Andor calls him Milo. Everybody calls him– I swear to God, I think Matt Smith’s character legally changes his name to Milo. Just because Jared Leto is like, “That’s who you are. That’s it. I run the cult. You’re Milo.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:29:17] By the way, speaking of weird things in this movie, and we’ll get to a lot of them. There was nothing more unsexy than being off the coast of Long Island. Now I am a Long Island native. 

June Diane Raphael [00:29:31] As am I. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:29:32] Not me baby. 

Paul Scheer [00:29:32] But when they say international waters, I’m thinking something very exotic. Not 13 miles off the coast of Montauk. 

June Diane Raphael [00:29:44] I’m like, you could for sure see a strip mall from there. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:29:48] Yeah. And it was like [beeping noises] International waters. I was like, “Is Don D’milo here? What’s going?” 

Paul Scheer [00:29:55] Morbius loves his outlet mall shopping. He’s like, “Well, I’ll hit the outlets and then we’ll get– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:30:01] –and then we’re going to go to Montauk and then we’re going to hang out with Billy Joel. 

June Diane Raphael [00:30:06] You know who I felt really badly for? Well, Anna, of course, But also. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:30:11] We got to put her in a coma. 

June Diane Raphael [00:30:14] I felt really bad for that crew on that ship, on that cargo ship. 

Paul Scheer [00:30:19] The mercenaries. Multiple times people tell you don’t worry about them. Like they’re like, “I don’t care about thsoe guys.” 

June Diane Raphael [00:30:25] Are we sure they all deserved to die? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:30:28] Well, I mean, the movie is trying to tell us they are. But here’s my question is why did he even need mercenaries? Just charter a boat and build a lab in it. Why do you need gun toting mercinaries? I don’t know. I think it’s just so they can be visually bad guys. So you’re okay with him killing them? 

Paul Scheer [00:30:47] Well, here’s my other question for you. Why do they need to be in international waters? Like what? Why do they need to be on the water? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:30:54] Cause he tells Milo, it’s pretty– it’s full blown illegal what I’m going to do. So I can only do it in international waters. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:31:02] Yeah. It’s like the FDA, Fauci’s not approving this type of experiment. 

Paul Scheer [00:31:08] Is this the bat that brought Covid to the states? Morbius. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:31:12] Yes. He’s like, the first scene takes place at a wet market. 

Paul Scheer [00:31:17] Now I do love when Morbius is recording his own journal. He goes, “I have echolocation. That’s bat radar for those uninitiated.” You fucking dope, it’s your own journal. 

June Diane Raphael [00:31:31] Okay, that made me think, is somebody– because to your point, Jason, there doesn’t seem to be any admin infrastructure at New Horizons. So it was like– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:31:44] [Indiscernible] You can’t do this. You’re out of control. 

June Diane Raphael [00:31:46] Right? But I was like, I know Martin’s not transcribing those notes from the tape. So is Jared Leto transcribing his own notes? 

Paul Scheer [00:31:55] I feel like he’s doing voice to text. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:32:01] Is Anna like, is this treatment covered by her PPO? 

June Diane Raphael [00:32:07] I thought you were to say, is it like a work study. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:32:09] I’m like, what? What I think is true is I believed the Jared Leto was operating out of a hospital. And I think he is not I think he’s operating out of– 

June Diane Raphael [00:32:22] Oh, Jason, that is not a hospital. No, that’s a lab in some warehouse that’s been converted. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:32:29] Right. Okay. 

Paul Scheer [00:32:30] I have issues with the labs because at one point a guy is forging hundred dollar bills and he’s like, “That’s my new science lab.” How? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:32:36] He walks in, He walks into a lab. He just overhears with his echolocation two guys trying to pass off counterfeit 100s. Then they’re like, “All right, we got to get back to the lab.” He follows them to their lab where they’re manufacturing money and he tweaks two-three things and is like, “Yup, now I could do my blood experiments on this.” 

Paul Scheer [00:32:59] It’s a printing press. He has a machine at Kinko’s and he takes out like the ink cartridges and now it’s a blood machine. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:33:10] And now I have my blood. It is absolutely insane that he’s– And it’s not even a time jump. I could understand he gets rid of the guys who are counterfeiting and he says, okay, this is raw materials I can use, time jump. Now he’s got it set up. No, immediately he’s like, screw, screw, screws screw screw. Perfect. And the things like spinning around. They were making money. This movie is nonsense. 

Paul Scheer [00:33:39] I have such an issue with the lack of refrigeration for all this blood. Because unless he has a Yeti backpack. The backpack that he throws the blood in doesn’t not look like–

Jason Mantzoukas [00:33:51] We’ve seen the kind of lab he needs to make it work. This is not that. 

June Diane Raphael [00:33:56] Yeah. 

Paul Scheer [00:33:59] I mean, where is the blood? I mean, also the amount of underground layers. They’re going deep. 

June Diane Raphael [00:34:06] I did love that the criminals referred to their counterfeit space as a lab. I was like, “Wow. They bring a certain level of professionalism to their work.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:34:16] As they’re trying to pass off fake one hundreds at the diner. Also, Morbius, all over the news, all over the Daily Bugle. Jonah Jameson is blowing him up. 

Paul Scheer [00:34:28] By the way, shot scenes for this movie. J. Jonah Jameson. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:34:32] Oh, really? 

Paul Scheer [00:34:33] Yes. And then they cut them. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:34:34] That’s heartbreaking. That’s heartbreaking. And maybe because they didn’t want to reveal. 

Paul Scheer [00:34:38] Well, because there are issues with the MCU. There’s a lot of mistakes. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:34:43] But he’s everywhere. He’s on the cover of the paper. But he’s also not hiding out at all. He’s hoodless, looking exactly like his incredibly identifiable self with Bix from Andor in a diner being like, “Well, I’m a vampire now.” 

Paul Scheer [00:35:01] But not that kind of vampire. My issue was how did he know that he couldn’t have animal blood? He’s like, “I have a thirst for human blood.” You didn’t even try animal blood. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:35:09] Well, he’s also– in his old place. In his old lab, there’s the blue synthetic blood, then there’s row after row of what looks like red human blood. Couldn’t he have drank that for weeks? 

June Diane Raphael [00:35:23] Well, no. I think only for hours. 

Paul Scheer [00:35:25] Well, it’s going down, 6 hours. 4 hours and 22 minutes. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:35:29] But isn’t that only for the synthetic? 

Paul Scheer [00:35:32] Yeah. 

June Diane Raphael [00:35:33] Oh, yeah, I guess you’re right. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:35:35] He doesn’t take any of the red blood. He’s grabbing the blue blood like crazy. 

Paul Scheer [00:35:39] He also doesn’t seem to really suck it out. Like he seems to just take a slug of the blood. Like I want to see him (sucking noises). 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:35:45] A blood slug? 

Paul Scheer [00:35:46] Like I really want. I want, like, when he’s in the jail cell– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:35:48] Oh, I’d like to take a blood slug from you. 

Paul Scheer [00:35:52] I just feel like he’s just like, “Hey, you’re leaving a lot of blood in there.” If I’m needing human blood, I’m going to suck that blood bag dry. I’m just gonna. Because when will I get the next batch? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:36:03] Well, the other thing is, because he doesn’t seem to have like, obviously there are vampiric urges that he has. Like, when she cuts her hand, when she gets there, when the cat scratches or whatever. 

Paul Scheer [00:36:15] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:36:15] She gets a cut and it activates him, right? But he also doesn’t attack, he only attacks people, he’s only out of control rather on the boat. So why isn’t he just getting people to donate blood to him to drink? He’s a Nobel Prize winning doctor. He has access to blood. 

Paul Scheer [00:36:40] And by the way, why are people so mad that he’s like at one point when he’s on the cover, “I knew that guy’s a fucking freak.” Like really? The Nobel Prize scientist who invented synthetic blood, you have an issue with, newspaper vendor? 

June Diane Raphael [00:36:54] I mean, I do you think it’s a hard sell because– I think it’s wonderful to donate blood. I try to donate blood, but it’s like, I don’t know that I want to donate blood for someone to drink. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:37:04] Well, I would happily drink blood. I would rather. Sorry. Freudian slip. I’m a vampire. Guys. I’ve been cast in Morbius 2: Still Morbin. No. I would happily give my blood for someone to drink so that they wouldn’t prey on a human being. 

June Diane Raphael [00:37:30] Can I have it? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:37:30] Yes! I would. June, pint after pint for you. 

June Diane Raphael [00:37:36] Thank you. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:37:37] Absolutely. My favorite part. The part where he does wild out. The first time he’s transformed into a vampire and he’s on the ceiling, in the boat, in his cage. And then they open it and he comes down and he kills all the mercenaries, right? Then he wakes up out of it like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.” And he’s like, “What happened here?” Amnesia. So he goes and he checks all the security footage, right? He’s watching the security cam footage of everything we just saw and vomits. Even Morbius doesn’t like the movie Morbius. Even Morbius is watching the scenes we watched and is like, (Vomit noises) “This is not good.” 

Paul Scheer [00:38:20] I want to just get into Tyrese’s character because these two cops and I love Al Madrigal, like he’s very funny in it and he’s great, but I know it’s a movie convention, but I need to call out that they never have talked before they get to the crime scene. They are stone cold, silent, and then they get there and it’s like information dump. It seems like Tyrese is like, “Don’t tell me anything till I’m standing exactly in the center of it.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:38:48] They also don’t have–  I mean, I’m assuming they are long term partners. They have no dynamic between them. 

Paul Scheer [00:38:56] Nope. And they seem to also work San Francisco for Venom, connecting the weirdos. Sony/Marvel Universe. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:39:04] Do you think they worked San Francisco or they just think this might be connected to the thing that happened in San Francisco, a.k.a. Venom? 

Paul Scheer [00:39:12] Oh, I thought like they were setting Tyrese up to be like a special investigator, which was confusing. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:39:18] I like that. 

Paul Scheer [00:39:19] Because when he has that earpiece, is he just getting the APB wire?  

Jason Mantzoukas [00:39:25] I think that’s just for the rest of the police, I think. 

Paul Scheer [00:39:27] But I mean, is he getting every call? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:39:30] I want to ask a nerd here. Is there a nerd who can– a singular person who can tell us, is Tyrese playing a character from comics that we should know? 

Audience Member [00:39:40] Yes. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:39:40] Who? 

Audience Member [00:39:41] He’s playing a vampire hunter that ends up teaming up with him to kill Dracula. 

Paul Scheer [00:39:45] Okay, so he is playing a vampire hunter, not Blade, who helps Morbius kill Dracula. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:39:53] By the way, give it up for this heroic Chicago native, guys. And well done, everybody. That you allowed him to speak without everybody being like, “I go, I go!” 

June Diane Raphael [00:40:07] Then I want to ask, why does Morbius refer to himself as Venom? Is he not? Is he Venom? 

Paul Scheer [00:40:13] That’s a joke. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:40:14] I think that’s a misdirect. 

June Diane Raphael [00:40:14] That’s a joke? 

Paul Scheer [00:40:15] It’s a joke because, by the way– 

June Diane Raphael [00:40:18] I don’t understand comedy. 

Paul Scheer [00:40:21] Okay. So when you watch the trailer, one of the moments in the trailer is like, “Who are you?” And he’s like, “I’m Venom.” And then he goes–. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:40:30] That’s in the trailer? 

Paul Scheer [00:40:32] Yes. And he goes, “Just joking. I’m Dr. Morbius.” That’s in the trailer. They just left it here in the movie as “I’m Venom.” And I think does he maybe say I’m joking, too? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:40:44] No. 

June Diane Raphael [00:40:45] I didn’t hear that. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:40:48] I thought he was saying that as a way to throw people off the scent or to be like, I’m not even going to identify myself, so I’m just going to say I’m this other character that has been causing trouble in the same world. 

Paul Scheer [00:41:01] Okay, so this is the line as it was written. He goes, “I’m Venom.” And he goes, “Just kidding. It’s Dr. Morbius at your service.” And actually I misquoted it. He says–

Jason Mantzoukas [00:41:19] At your service? 

Paul Scheer [00:41:21] I misquoted it. It says, “I’m just kidding. It’s Dr. Michael Morbius at your service.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:41:26] I’m sorry. I have it here. And it’s actually “At your cervix.” And it’s like a joke. He’s making a joke. Dr. Michael Morbius at your cervix. 

Paul Scheer [00:41:40] I will say I understand that this movie falls very weirdly in the MCU. In the MCU, I don’t know where this falls because there are elements of, you know, Spider-Man. Like we’re referencing X-Men. There’s a lot of stuff going on. But, I will say the one thing that doesn’t seem incredibly established in this universe as is are superheroes. Right? Like, there doesn’t seem like there’s a lot of superheroes. But the lack of reaction to vampires seems suspect. Like, take a look at this. This is a clip, too. This is a news anchor just talking about a vampire attack. 

Movie Audio [00:42:27] Breaking news on the Lower East Side where three people have been killed. Authorities have confirmed the discovery of three new bodies outside a bar popular with Wall Street traders. And like the victims before them, they were completely drained of their blood, earning the killer the moniker “vampire murderer.” The prime suspect, renowned scientist Dr. Michael Morbius, remains at large. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:42:49] So they’re not saying it is. They’re saying the moniker, the vampire killer. So they’re saying because the bodies are drained of blood, the serial killer must be draining their blood. Not that there is an actual vampire. 

Paul Scheer [00:43:03] Then they go with a copycat vampire murderer, but still draining of blood. I’m going to put some more gravitas on that news report. 

June Diane Raphael [00:43:14] I would think so. Also, because the nurse who I think has already been killed at this point only has two fang marks. There are no other wounds. So that’s concerning. That’s going to raise some eyebrows. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:43:28] The movie wants to have it both ways. The movie wants for people to be like, “Yeah, we live in a world where crazy shit happens.” I.e. there’s a Spider-Man, there’s a Thanos. We are in the MCU technically, sort of. Are we, nerd? 

Paul Scheer [00:43:44] Yes. Because I can answer this, nerd, a little bit. You can back me up. The illusion at the end when Michael Keaton appears, is that he was also displaced from his universe when Doctor Strange pulled all the spider-men together. 

June Diane Raphael [00:44:05] So that wasn’t Batman? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:44:07] No. But. 

Paul Scheer [00:44:16] No reason why you should understand this. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:44:18] You have every right to think that because Michael Keaton has played both Batman, but also the Spider-Man villain, The Vulture. 

June Diane Raphael [00:44:28] And Birdman. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:44:29] And Birdman. And Beetlejuice. In this movie, he’s Beetlejuice. 

Paul Scheer [00:44:37] He’s not reprising his role as Birdman in this movie. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:44:42] What if Morbius was like, “Oh, fuck, I’m in trouble. Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.” (Beetlejuice impression) Hey. Hey there. We’re going to take a shit. Got to drink that blood. That’s my audition for the remake of Beetlejuice. 

Paul Scheer [00:44:58] By the way. By the way, there’s a great line for Beetlejuice. “At your cervix.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:45:04] Yes. See, I am now writing a Beetlejuice reboot. 

June Diane Raphael [00:45:11] Okay. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:45:12] But, yes, that character is the Spider-Man Vulture villain who appears at the end of the movie. 

Paul Scheer [00:45:21] So he is tied loosely because the same little thing happens in the skyline of New York that happens when Doctor Strange– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:45:30] And it’s also why at the end of Venom, there is a similar multiversal displacement of people. 

Paul Scheer [00:45:38] And again, I will say it like I said at the beginning, this is not a Marvel movie. It says “in association with Marvel.” It’s like Feige’s like, “Oh, I really don’t want you to take Spider-Man. But legally I can’t say no. Okay. Aye aye aye.” Like to see a Sinister Six film under this? Oh, God it would be so upsetting. Why would you destroy it? Let me ask you a question, cat people. Do you shake a litter box and cat come? 

June Diane Raphael [00:46:11] Right as though, like, the food’s in there. 

Paul Scheer [00:46:14] Yeah. 

June Diane Raphael [00:46:15] Here, kitty, kitty. 

Paul Scheer [00:46:17] It’s like, why would the cat come running to its toilet? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:46:20] Oh, wait a minute. Wait. When you were potty training your children, didn’t you do the handle (jingle noises) to create a Pavlovian response? That is like, “Welp, I guess it’s time to shit. So let’s do this.”. 

June Diane Raphael [00:46:38] Now, Paul and Jason, I have an announcement. I have to go Morb right now. It’s 8:25. I have a 9:56 flight out of Chicago, so we didn’t want to reveal too early. I’m leaving the show a bit early because– I know and I’m so upset about it, I can’t believe it. It’s horrifying. But let me tell you this. I have to get a child ready in a pig Minecraft costume tomorrow. And as hard– Thank you. As hard as it is to leave here to go do that, I truly must go. And when we planned this, we didn’t want to have to reschedule Chicago again. And we knew it was the night before Halloween. I’m so sorry to leave. I love you all. I gotta Morb. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:47:26] Give it up for June! 

Paul Scheer [00:47:37] So, Yes. So the show is going to continue. We have a lot more to get through. I will say this before, maybe I was a little hard on Matt Smith. I did like the bromance that they had, like when they were walking around. I was like oh, now you’re quoting the the notebook to me like, you know, I felt like they– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:47:54] Oh, no I liked them as friends. And if anything, I wanted more, I guess I wanted to understand more, what they had, like why they were kind of brothers, you know? It really didn’t make sense to me that Matt Smith was so connected to him still, because kid Jared Leto leaves to go and do his whatever. He becomes a, you know, a Nobel winning blah blah. And Matt Smith just seems to still be like around. 

Paul Scheer [00:48:22] Can I ask another question about this. Is that house that they’re living in, that estate,. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:48:28] In Greece? 

Paul Scheer [00:48:28] In Greece. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:48:29] Yeah. 

Paul Scheer [00:48:29] Is that all full of kids with the exact same disease? Is there like, a leper colony for that disease? And if so, why is he so committed to this one kid when you would imagine there’s floors and floors of them? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:48:41] Unclear. And not only that, but if we’re meant to believe the kid Morbius’ lines, multiple kids are just dying. Just expiring. So he’s taken on– There’s an element of this movie which could have been like, “I’ve watched so many people die that I’m not going to attach myself to you, Lucian. I’m going to call you Milo. You are a disposable person.” And but then he connects with him. He takes care of him. He becomes an older brother to him or whatever. But no, that’s not what happens. Then the very next moment, Jared Harris is like, “We’re sending you out of here. You’re too smart. And he’s like, “See you later.” And then the kid gets his ass kicked. But then later, they’re like, “You’re my brother.” 

Paul Scheer [00:49:27] This is why I call bullshit on it. Because 25 years ago, there was no Internet. How was he keeping in touch with him? I just feel like I have a lot of friends I would like to see from 6th grade. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:49:39] Origami notes. The only way you can get in touch. 

Paul Scheer [00:49:42] “We found one of these on the boat.” Shit. Like it was like. All right, I guess. Oh, my gosh. The fact that he flies like a squirrel jumper. Is that what it’s called? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:49:55] Like a flying squirrel suit? 

Paul Scheer [00:49:57] Yeah. That’s what he looks like. It looks like he’s in a flying squirrel suit. It doesn’t look cool. And I don’t understand why he would need to fly when he can just jump with the same amount of like– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:50:10] Why not just let him fly? Why not just let him just– or turn into a or maybe his powers– Nerd? Does he not turn into a bat? No. Thank you. 

Paul Scheer [00:50:20] Does he have control of bats? Oh, why doesn’t Matt? Okay. Matt Smith is attacked by bats, and he’s like “Bats now like me because I’m the Bats Brother, not Batman but I’m the Bat Brother.” But then the bats hate Matt Smith. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:50:33] Why isn’t Matt Smith having the exact same experience as Morbius? 

Paul Scheer [00:50:38] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:50:38] With the bats, with flying, with the rest. Like Morbius the living vampire– what? 

Paul Scheer [00:50:44] I think Matt Smith can fly. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:50:46] Oh, he can? 

Paul Scheer [00:50:46] When they’re in that subway fight scene, which really (sighs). 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:50:53] There are so many people. That’s the thing. There’s so many people in the movie, in the subway tunnel, in the subway station, on the city streets that are watching this fight happen. And everybody’s like, (saracastic) “Oh, no, look out.” It’s so casual. They’re like walking through the subway tunnel and they’re flying up and around. It’s testament to New Yorkers who are just like, “Gotta go to work.” 

Paul Scheer [00:51:16] “We got to go, got to go, go, go. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:51:18] What? Two living vampires fighting around me? Got to go to work. 

Paul Scheer [00:51:21] Like, the thing that bums me out the most about this movie is that Matt Smith just wears a nice suit all the time. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:51:28] Oh, yeah.

Paul Scheer [00:51:30] Like he doesn’t take on a real different personality. He just is like, “Well, I’ll wear a button down shirt.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:51:35] Can I ask the nerd a question? Okay. And you know what? Yeah, nerd. What’s your name? Michael? 

Paul Scheer [00:51:45] (Dramatic) Bum, bum, bum, bum. Michael the Nerd. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:51:54] Are you Michael Morbius? You have to answer truthfully. My question for you, Michael. Is Matt Smith playing a character from the Marvel Universe? 

Audience Member [00:52:08] He’s playing kind of an amalgamation of two different characters. 

Paul Scheer [00:52:10] A mash up, right? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:52:11] Okay. So it’s not a direct 1 to 1. He’s not a villain in the in the Marvel Universe. Thank you. That’s all I want to know. 

Paul Scheer [00:52:18] So much so that Matt Smith said this. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:52:23] It’s Morbin Time? 

Paul Scheer [00:52:25] He goes, “I was somewhat confused with my character’s history.” As he wasn’t aware how Milo tied into the hunger’s greatest legacy and origins from the comics since it wasn’t clarified in the script. Many reports came from the set that he was like his character was named Laxias Crown. But then they changed it to Milo because they had to reshoot the movie. They also thought that that character of Loxias was a character in the film or in the comics that they decided to change it at the last minute. Anyway, they didn’t keep the character’s name. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:53:03] Is that why they changed it from Lucian to Milo because it was based on a character? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:53:06] Well, his name was I guess Loxias. L-O-X-I-A-S Crown. Then they changed the Lucien Crown and then Milo. So three name changes for one script. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:53:20] And none of it helps clarify who the character is at all. 

Paul Scheer [00:53:24] And it seems to me, according to Matt Smith, no one told him like, “Hey, in the comics you are this character.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:53:32] And what I think one of the movie’s most egregious problems was other than just kind of being mad at the people who in a world that kind of bullied him or tormented him or didn’t make his life easy. He’s just going to chomp everybody in realistic sense as a villain, as a villain in a superhero story, because that’s– even though this is a vampire story– this is ultimately a superhero story. There is no clear villains motive. He doesn’t want to do anything but dance and flirt with girls and kill people. 

Paul Scheer [00:54:10] He wants to kill people. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:54:11] He only seems to kill people when it’s like presented. When he’s slighted or what? 

[00:54:17] Or by the way, he’s an attractive man at a bar and he starts hitting on some other guy’s girlfriend and he’s like, “Hey, that’s my girlfriend.” And he’s like, “I’ll kill you.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:54:24] And then does. 

Paul Scheer [00:54:25] And then does. Like that guy, he might be a dick, but it was his girlfriend. All he said was like “Her drinks are spoken for.”. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:54:34] Also when he kills the nurse in– is it New Horizons? 

Paul Scheer [00:54:39]  Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:54:40] When he kills the nurse in Horizon’s, like what a dick move to be like, “Hey, this this woman that you, my brother Michael Morbius, a Nobel Prize winner–. 

Paul Scheer [00:54:50] Doctor. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:54:51] Doctor Michael Morbius, at your cervix. That this person that you work with intimately, her life matters nothing to me. I’m going to chomp her and drain her of all the blood. He is a dick, but I don’t know why. And my problem was I don’t know what his– He has no plan. He has no want. Other than to date.

Paul Scheer [00:55:14] He seems like he could live a fine life. But now that he’s a vampire, he’s like, “Fuck it, I’ll be evil.” And we see the ultimate evil when he rips down the warning tape when he leaves the lab. Ooh, the villain (ripping noise) warning tape doesn’t mean anything to me. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:55:32] I loved when he pretends to be the lawyer to visit Jared Leto in prison. Jared Leto already is in prison. He’s in there and he leaves him some blood and then leaves his cane behind. And is like walking out of the prison like doop badoop badoop badoop. 

Paul Scheer [00:55:54] It’s like a Keyser Soze thing. But for no one. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:55:56] Yeah. It’s for the camera that’s what I mean it’s for the camera.

Paul Scheer [00:56:01] Because he’s like this, limp, limp. Oh, oh. Hey, no more limp. But who was the fake limp for? And why would they let him into the cell? And then why would they let him give him stuff? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:56:16] How do Tyrese and Al Madrigal not know that Matt Smith has visited him in jail? Why don’t they know about him? They find out so late that there’s another vampire. 

Paul Scheer [00:56:24] I mean, why do they even arrest him? It’s like he gets in jail to get immediately out. Like he fucking Morbs in the interrogation. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:56:35] They are so unimpressed by the fact that they’re in the presence of a vampire. True. Like they were like. “Huh? Okay, we’re going to come back to this.” 

Paul Scheer [00:56:47] I also, and again, this movie is not sure about powers or anything, because there is also a moment when Dr. Michael Morbius is trying to go to see Jared Harris, who’s like, “Come, I’m wounded.”. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:57:01] Oh man, Jared Harris. I think this is true and I didn’t look it up. Jared Harris dies grisly deaths in every role he has. He’s never survived to the end of a movie or TV show, period. 

Paul Scheer [00:57:17] “Michael, come to the apartment.” Why? Just tell me now. What’s going on? 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:57:24] “I tried to talk to Milo. I know his name is Lucian, but you decided to call him Milo and we’re all under your thrall.” 

Paul Scheer [00:57:35] “When you were a bully, you renamed him, and we all went with it.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:57:39] “Even me, an adult. Even me, an adult. Even though I’ve not aged in 25 years. And you are now Jared Leto. And we are essentially the same age. (groans)” 

Paul Scheer [00:57:53] So when he goes to visit dying Jared Harris, Morbius is like creep sidestepping. It’s like, dude, if you have echolocation, you know what’s in the fucking room. You don’t need to be like, “Ooh, I don’t know. Is someone going to jump out at me?” 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:58:10] His powers are so fickle because like when Matt Smith has what, what’s the Bix from Andor’s name? 

Paul Scheer [00:58:20] Uh, Martine. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:58:22] Martine. When he’s got Martine and he’s like, “He’ll come for you.” He’s kind of trying to get to Martine to lure Morbius to him. And Morbius can hear everything up until the point where he kills Martine? 

Paul Scheer [00:58:35] Yup. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:58:35] And I was like, why didn’t you go rescue her? He listens to the whole thing happen. And the look on Jared Leto’s face is like, “I wonder what’s going to happen next.” 

Paul Scheer [00:58:46] But then he makes her into a vampire. Do we get a post-credits scene with her? Nope. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:58:51] Is that what happens? Does she become a vampire? Michael the nerd, is she playing a vampire character? 

Audience Member [00:59:00] Yes. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:59:00] Who? 

Audience Member [00:59:01] She’s basically Selene in the comics, they’ve changed so many times. The Energy Vampire from X-Men. 

Paul Scheer [00:59:08] Okay, so she’s the energy vampire from the X-Men. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:59:11] Great. Okay, great. 

Paul Scheer [00:59:12] I will say this. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:59:13] Thank you. 

Paul Scheer [00:59:13] I liked her performance. 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:59:15] And by the way, give it up for Michael. Michael doing heroic work all show long. Everybody give him a pat on the back on the way out. Don’t touch him, though. Don’t touch anybody. Don’t touch each other. 

Paul Scheer [00:59:33] I will say this. I liked her performance. I thought the love story was bullshit, but– 

Jason Mantzoukas [00:59:40] He’s a vampire. She’s freaked out. They don’t know what’s going on. They go up to the roof. He goes close their eyes and then kisses her? I didn’t think that was cool. 

Paul Scheer [00:59:50] I thought when he goes, “Hey, I wasn’t a Morb out on you.” And then she’s like, “I thought it was romantic.” Did you? This man turned into a fucking creature, and you’re like oh cool. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:00:00] I thought they were going to stone cold fridge her in a way that I was like, “Wait, are they killing her now?” Just to motivate him to get back at Matt Smith? And I didn’t like that. But then they instead just turn her into a vampire, I guess. 

Paul Scheer [01:00:14] Well, they needed something to activate Matt Smith and Dr. Morbius to fall through–

Jason Mantzoukas [01:00:21] The Earth? 

Paul Scheer [01:00:22] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:00:23] They fight into the center of the earth? 

Paul Scheer [01:00:26] Are they falling down the middle of a building? I’m so confused. It was like I was watching the end of Transformers 1. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:00:32] Is it just so that they can get to a level where there are bats? Also, Morbius seems to have– obviously has a relationship with bats, right? We get that. Vampire bats. Where does he go at the beginning? Where is he in the caverns at the beginning? Well, okay, hold on a second. Michael. Where does he go in the beginning? 

Paul Scheer [01:00:55] Costa Rica. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:00:55] Costa Rica. He’s in Costa Rica studying vampire bats. Do we think there are vampire bats in New York City? No. These are just some basic ass bats? 

Paul Scheer [01:01:04] These are regular. This is like Ant-Man getting the ants to play the drums. Yeah. Any ants can do that. Ant-Man has those powers. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:01:13] So he can control any bat anywhere? 

Paul Scheer [01:01:15] No, no. The bats are his friends. He’s like, “Guys, help! Guys! I’m being captured.” And then the bats are like, “Oh, shit. Our brother.” And they all– 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:01:23] I guess. I guess you’re right. But then, boy, would I like it if he could turn into a bat or something. 

Paul Scheer [01:01:30] Well, he’s kind of flying. I mean, his bones are hollow. We know that. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:01:34] Why? Why? (laughing) The idea that you thought that he gets this shot–

Paul Scheer [01:01:49] Ah hollow bones! 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:01:51] –and gets hollow bones incredible. So do you think Superman’s bones are hollow? 

Paul Scheer [01:01:55] No, he’s not a bat. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:01:57] So it’s not just anybody who can fly? 

Paul Scheer [01:02:00] No, not at all. Only that he’s a bat he as hollow bones. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:02:04] Got it. Got it. 

Paul Scheer [01:02:05] Or Bird. But he’s not a Birdman. And Birdman in the movie is not [indiscernible] 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:02:10] Do you think Hawkman, DC Justice League member, Hawkman and Hawkgirl. Do they have a hollow bones? 

Paul Scheer [01:02:16] No, because their planet, they don’t have hollow bones. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:02:19] Okay. 

Paul Scheer [01:02:20] Well, okay, so this is the one thing that Martine said about her character, which I thought was odd. She said she based it on AOC. Which I love AOC. Great. But it’s also we are like, Why? 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:02:37] How? Where is that evident? 

Paul Scheer [01:02:39] I don’t see that at all. Like, I don’t see– she’s just a scientist. Like, she’s not– I don’t see. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:02:48] She’s not a politician. I have follow up questions. 

Paul Scheer [01:02:53] Yeah I do too. It seems like an odd choice to be like, “Oh, yeah, no, AOC is how I viewed Martine.” What part? I don’t know. I want to get deeper into what she was talking about. I want to get into it with the audience because I know that you all have questions and I’m going to go out here to the crowd. I’m going to talk to you. Okay? Your name and your question. 

Audience Member [01:03:13] My name’s Adrian. And my question is, if this movie’s present day, that puts them in the children’s hospital 25 years ago in Greece. Why did they shoot it like it’s post-war England? 

Paul Scheer [01:03:27] Yeah. The car that pulled up was odd and old, right? It seemed like a model T. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:03:32] We get it, Adrian. Greece doesn’t have modern cars. Oh, well, I’m sorry. 

Paul Scheer [01:03:40] Well all their cars run on feta cheese, right? 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:03:44] What? 

Paul Scheer [01:03:44] All their cars running saganaki, right? 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:03:46]  Yes. Yes. You know it’s a new fuel in Greece. It’s just it’s cooked cheese. 

Paul Scheer [01:03:55] Okay. Yes. You have your notebook out. You have a question? Yes. Okay. Go for it. 

Audience Member [01:03:58] My name is Laura. Why would you lose your license for combining human DNA with bat DNA? And once you have combined human DNA and bat DNA, why would you give it to a mouse, which is neither a human or a bat? 

Paul Scheer [01:04:17] Now, that’s the question here. Get two pieces of candy for that. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:04:20] The movie does a lot of bullshit like that where it’s like, “We know that you, the audience, understand that medical tests are done on mice. So we’re just going to do that, even though it doesn’t make any sense to the movie we’re doing or what’s happening. So fuck you.” Here’s the reality. The movie, If you watch it again, please don’t. The movie is constantly saying to you, the audience, “You’re a fucking idiot. You’re a fucking idiot. I’m not even going to help you understand. I’m just going to show you a bunch of garbage.” And you’re going to have to be like, I guess I like it. Jared Leto. 

Paul Scheer [01:05:00] Obviously we have opinions about this movie, but there are people out there with a different opinion. It’s now time for second opinions. 

Audience Member [01:05:10] (singing) Oh, I really want to bite somebody. I kind of want to fight with somebody. Why doesn’t Matt Smith like me? I need a second opinion. 

Paul Scheer [01:05:25] Amazing. Great job. Give it up! 

Paul Scheer [01:05:32] Here’s what I got. I got some second opinions from Amazon. Here we go. There are 39,000 reviews. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:05:43] I don’t think that’s right. 

Paul Scheer [01:05:44] It does seem odd. Molly Reynolds, one of our producers, put this together, 39,000. But it does seem because of the Internet meme-ification of it, maybe it’s true. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:05:55] Oh, is that it? 

Paul Scheer [01:05:55] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:05:55] That just because it became such a– 

Paul Scheer [01:05:57] I think it might have been. Yeah. 55% are five star reviews. Here we go. Hey, Pew writes, “Remember when there was a good old horror movie on every Saturday night?” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:06:07] No. 

Paul Scheer [01:06:07] “And you and your friends would curl up in the family or living room with bowls of popcorn and potato chips just waiting to be scared. Guess what? They’re back.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:06:17] They’re back? 

Paul Scheer [01:06:18] Yep. “This is one of a new generation of horror movies, not the classic Frankenstein, Dracula, The Wolf Man. Plus the myriad of sequels and sci fi outer space. Japanese monsters. Nor is it the slasher gore everywhere. Friday the 13th, Elm Street. Losing your lunch type. That was prevalent a few years ago. This is a good, straightforward horror movie. Worth the cost. Well, you’ll remember it, but you won’t have any trouble going upstairs afterwards. Five stars. The title of the review. Fast shipping and quick handling. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:06:53] You know what’s disappointing is– and I hadn’t even really thought about this, but wouldn’t it? This movie would have been so much better if it was a horror movie or if it was. If it leaned into being a horror. 

Paul Scheer [01:07:05] Yeah. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:07:05] I know it was horror in some senses, but like the Marvel. What was it? Werewolf by Night, Marvel presents or whatever. Werewolf by Night, which is on Disney Plus right now, is a Marvel horror special. And that was, I thought, fantastic and tonally got what this movie kind of missed. 

Paul Scheer [01:07:29] 100%. Yeah. I’ll end it on this one from baby doo doo, who says– 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:07:36] Oh, really? You’re going to end it with baby doo doo? 

Paul Scheer [01:07:38] Baby doo doo says–

Jason Mantzoukas [01:07:40] This is baby’s doo doo? 

Paul Scheer [01:07:41] Maybe. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:07:42] This baby’s so cute. And you said it’s COVID free. So I wanna hold it, which is bad. 

Paul Scheer [01:07:47] Don’t fall into that trap, Jason. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:07:48] I fell into his trap before and I got bit. 

Paul Scheer [01:07:52] Baby doo doo writes, “This is a movie I watched ten times before my rental ended. A 48 hours. Worth the time.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:08:05] I am a serial killer. 

Paul Scheer [01:08:06] “Worth the time and money. I have watched almost every vampire movie and vampire series. A big fan of the Dracula character, however, Morbius is giving the best of both worlds. The ending gives the idea that there’s a positive of Morbius becoming part of the Avengers. It creates the biggest expectation of Morbius. I commend the writer for a meaningful storyline as well as the producers and actors that brought it to life. Double thumbs up.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:08:37] Incredible. 

Paul Scheer [01:08:38] Well, thumbs up is double, not thumb up. You never say thumb up. An the title is “Through the roof.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:08:47] If you’re gonna watch it that much, buy the movie. If you love it, buy the movie. Here’s what’s crazy. Morbius, the living vampire, exists in the same cinematic universe. And Michael, the nerd, correct me if I’m wrong, as ManBat? Or is ManBat DC? 

Audience Member [01:09:05] DC. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:09:05] Okay, thank you. Thank you. Okay, disregard. 

Paul Scheer [01:09:08] Oh wait. I was actually thinking this whole time that Batman was– 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:09:15] The x-ray really rattled me. 

Paul Scheer [01:09:17] I was thinking that Batman was in this universe, but he’s not, because I just think of this as like a shitty DC movie, but it’s a Marvel. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:09:24] That’s the thing, this feels like it’s more of a DC movie than it is a Marvel movie. And as does Venom, frankly, and Venom 2. Dot dot dot. 

Paul Scheer [01:09:37] All right, so this is written by our friend. So when we announced that we were doing Morbius here in Chicago, I got an email. An email said, “I’m a huge fan of the podcast, a long time listener, and I was a crew member on Morbius. My role kept me very close to the action. I can’t tell you my name, but you can call me Bat on the Wall.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:10:01] I’m going to have a Twix. Is that okay? 

Paul Scheer [01:10:04] Yeah, go for it. And here are the six points that Bat on the Wall writes. “First up, Jared was method acting. This included acting very sickly and disabled. During the first half of filming. For example, he used crutches to go to the bathroom, hobbling down the corridor at a snail’s pace. Each toilet break would last 30 minutes. But it was a two minute walk away. He also wouldn’t come to set for 5 hours once because he hadn’t found Dr. Morbius inside of him yet.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:10:43] I’m so nervous that I’m going to be on a job at some point and somebody is going to write an email to something like this and be like, Jason Mantzoukas spent so long having diarrhea in his trailer. He didn’t come out because he was nervous, because he didn’t have wipes for his butt. 

Paul Scheer [01:11:04] Bat on the Wall continues and says that he also wore an earwig while filming. And his assistant–

Jason Mantzoukas [01:11:12] An earwig is an ear piece where they feed you your lines. 

Paul Scheer [01:11:15] Like the same thing that Tyrese had in his ear where he gets the police report. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:11:21] Yeah, except that Tyrese isn’t using it as an actor. His character is using it to hear the police. 

Paul Scheer [01:11:29] Exactly. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:11:30] But this is some this is something so that some people need to have their lines fed to them. 

Paul Scheer [01:11:35] And some people who are big method actors, like even Marlon Brando liked having the earwig because it kept them that much more in the moment. If I don’t know what I’m going to say, how can I be acting? 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:11:46] Brando is, if you haven’t seen it before, when you go home tonight, Google “Marlon Brando cue cards” or something like that. There’s a great photo of Marlon Brando on the set of The Godfather doing a scene and Robert Duvall, the incomparable, the incredible Robert Duvall has a cue card hung around his body with Brando’s lines on it. It’s like this big. 

Paul Scheer [01:12:15] Jason. I’ve also worn a cue card for an actor I was working with. You wore a cue card? 

Paul Scheer [01:12:22] Multiple times, multiple times. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:12:26] Huge reveal. 

Paul Scheer [01:12:27] Okay. Point number two, Jared Leto constantly ad libbed what he thought was hilarious dialogue, but was actually deeply unfunny and vaguely disturbing. Most takes would last 15 minutes, all just him solidly ad libbing. It became such an issue that there were meetings with the studio to see if they could get anything from the scenes. Were they salvageable? The best/worst day for this was a scene with Morbius and Martine flirting in the lab. There was a cat in there and Jared kept on repeating weird lines like “That cat just shit in my mouth.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:13:23] You gotta “yes, and” that. You gotta. You gotta “yes, and” that. Yes, and I bet it tasted great. 

Paul Scheer [01:13:33] “I’m going to roll that cat up like a little butt burrito.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:13:39] What? That’s not a thing. 

Paul Scheer [01:13:40] Nope. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:13:41] Like a butt burrito is not a real thing. 

Paul Scheer [01:13:45] And finally, “Gravity always wins in the end. I guess that accounts for the pubic hair in my cake.” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:13:55] Wait, is that a Clarence Thomas line? That’s going back. That’s for the oldies in the room. That’s for Gen X right there. 

Paul Scheer [01:14:08] “Matt Smith. Cool person, great actor. Hope he got paid. Okay.” And then finally this. “We shot a fight sequence for one and a half months. It was a huge fight between Morbius and Milo in Central Park, which was an English wood where they painted the bottom half of the trees bright red. And then we shot the rest in an English park that looked nothing like Central Park. I looked up the plot of the released movie because I have not seen it. And the bats that help him defeat Milo did not exist in the original version. Morbius jabs the serum into Milo’s heart. When they are grappling midair, they fall to the ground in Central Park in an embrace. Then they also changed the Martine plot. It originally ended with Morbius and Martine flying off into the sky together while the cops watch and Bat on the Wall includes the script right here. So this is how the movie ends. Morbius says, “Ready?” 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:15:16] I’m gonna eat another Twix. 

Paul Scheer [01:15:16] He holds out his hand. Martine takes it. Martine says, “Let’s get out of here.” Then, dot dot dot, a big gust of wind blows through, Morbius says, “Wait for it.” dot dot dot. “Now!” They leap into the air together, catching an updraft. The cops are taken back by surprise. They train their weapons into the sky on Morbius and Martine and Morbius says, “Easy, guys, settle down.” Credits. And Back on the Wall wants us to know that all the after credits scenes were not shot in principal photography. So that was all reshoots. Yeah. This movie, you know, got a 50% on the tomatometer, but a 71% on the audience score. The budget was 83 million. The opening weekend was 39. The domestic gross was 73. The top movies of 2022 are Top Gun: Maverick, Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness and Jurassic World Dominion. This movie did come in 23 in the top 200 movies of 2022, and it was beat by Moonfall. Moonfall made more money than Morbius. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:16:35] Fuck the moon, Fuck the moon. Fuck the moon. 

Paul Scheer [01:16:39] So that is that. The only other thing I want to add here that I think is interesting is that Jared Leto also said that Pokemon was a big influence. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:16:47] Of course.You can see it. 

Paul Scheer [01:16:48] For the portrayal of Morbius’ powers. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:16:50] Gotta get ’em all. 

Paul Scheer [01:16:51] And Jared Leto also said this first movie is a first date. And, you know, we’re just getting to know each other. This is kind of our first step forward. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:17:02] More of a first impression. 

Paul Scheer [01:17:03] Yeah, I think if you look at Wolverine, if you look at Batman, you see a lot of these films evolve over time. You know, there’s a relationship that develops there and who knows? We’ll see what happens. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:17:15] I genuinely hope nothing happens. Although, I would love, I would happily take Matt Smith and Martine forward. Those are characters I’m interested in. 

Paul Scheer [01:17:30] Well, Matt Smith is dead. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:17:32] Is he? Is anybody dead? 

Paul Scheer [01:17:34] I mean, I guess you can say that. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:17:35] I don’t know. The woman who plays Martine, I think is incredible. I’ve been referring to her as Bix from Andor because she’s fantastic in an incredible show. She was also in Father of the Bride, the remake of Father of the Bride, which is also incredible. And she’s fantastic. And I’ve been calling her Bix from Andor the whole night and I wanted to just say her name is Adria Arjona, so I wanted to shout that out. Amazing. Fantastic. 

Paul Scheer [01:18:01] Would you recommend this movie? 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:18:02] Would I recommend this movie? Fuck, yeah. 

Paul Scheer [01:18:09] It’s Morbin time, baby. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:18:10] Even though I hated it. I would absolutely recommend it. Because exactly kind of what you and June said. It’s very slick. It’s good. It’s like they do a good job, even though it makes no sense. It’s a pile of garbage. And I don’t care about any of this nonsense. 

Paul Scheer [01:18:25] I will say this, that this movie does pay off some dividends because I was watching it. June was about 5 minutes behind me. And occasionally I would get a little bit ahead of her and I’d look back and I don’t remember that scene at all. And she’s only 5 minutes behind me. And there were things that I just straight up missed and like– Yeah. And I was like, oh, it does pay off. There’s more here. There’s more. There is a lot going on. And I think– 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:18:56] There’s a lot going on because we’re watching jared Leto– Oh, God. We’re watching Jared Leto turn into a living vampire who has a thirst for blood and spicy Cheetos? Like when he takes down the counterfeit ring, he’s like, “You know, get out of here. You can take the money, but leave the spicy Cheetos.” And I was like, Is that what he subsisting on? 

Paul Scheer [01:19:21] And we all know, Michael, that Morbius is a hot takis guy. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:19:27] Actually. Michael, is there anything that you would like to say? 

Audience Member [01:19:32] I’d like, to this. If I got anything wrong, please leave me alone online. 

Paul Scheer [01:19:36] Don’t attack Michael online. 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:19:40] Poor Michael. Poor Michael is like, “Hey, if I got anything wrong, don’t troll me online.” 

Paul Scheer [01:19:47] Thank you, Chicago! We will be back! 

Jason Mantzoukas [01:19:50] We did it Chicago! That’s right. Thanks, everybody who wore costumes! Happy Halloween! Eat shit! 

Paul Scheer [01:20:00] Thank you for listening to this episode of How Did This Get Made? The conversation continues with some deleted scenes on next week’s Last Looks. Also, Jason and I will sit down and talk about what we are watching, what we’re into, and so much more. Last Looks is changing and we want you to get on board. Plus, we’re going have an interview with director Jason Woliner in an upcoming episode. He directed the brand new amazing series on Peacock called Paul T Goldman. If you’re not watching, watch and then be able to catch up with our interview with him. If you want to check out what we’re up to, well, you can check out June on social media. She’s just @junedianeraphael. You can also check out me on social media. I’m just @paulscheer, Jason, not on social media, but check out the giant show that we did on Twitch, Me and Rob Hubel and a lot of your How Did This Get Made favorites on my YouTube channel. Just go to my YouTube page and watch Celebrity Garage Sale. You’ll see people like Rob Riggle, Nicole Byer, Lauren Lapkus, Carl Tart, and so many more people. Just head on over to my YouTube page. And you can also be watching select clips of How Did This Get Made there. It’s a lot of fun. All right. We’ll see you next week. And in the meantime, if you want to get yourself your merch. That’s right. You want to get your Morbin merch, head on over to Teepublic.com/store/HDTGM and you’ll see Morbin and more. I mean, that shirt sold out quick, but they’re still there now. And a big thank you to our amazing team, our producers, Scott Sonne, Molly Reynolds, our engineer, Alex Gonzales. Welcome to the show. And our movie picking producer Avril Haley and our publisher, July Diaz. We will be back with more. How Did This Get Made next week for Last Looks? Bye for now.