EP. 339 — Beautiful Disaster LIVE!

Paul Scheer Fighting fucking and projectile vomiting. Finally, a rom com for everyone. We saw a Beautiful Disaster, so you know what that means.

 

Music [Intro Song]

 

Hello people of Earth. And hello people of New Haven! We are here tonight in the pizza capital of the world. To talk about the 2023 film. Yes, this movie came out literally months ago. Beautiful Disaster. It’s like Fight Club meets 50 Shades of Gray meets American Pie, but produced by the Hallmark Channel. If you’ve not seen this movie, what do you need to know? Well, there’s a real good girl who’s also really good at poker, but she’s leaving that behind to go to college, where she meets a dude who’s in a fight club. A real bad boy who ain’t that bad. They have an interesting relationship. I don’t get why they’re not together, but that’s the whole movie. There’s another dude. He’s much older. We’ll get into that. And then the movie takes a wild twist when Brian Austin Green shows up as this girl’s father, and proceeds to turn this into a weird heist movie. More fights are had. Deals are made and in the end, everything turns out A-okay. And here’s the thing. I hope you stayed for the post-credit sequence. So we’ll talk about all of that and more. But first, let me introduce my co-host. Please welcome to the stage, Mr. Jason Mantzoukas.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What’s up, jerks?! What’s happening in New Haven, Connecticut? I came to your city. I took a Lactaid, and I ate pizza. Or I should say I ate a pizza. Get that a out of my pizza.

 

Paul Scheer Jason.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Paul.

 

Paul Scheer You and I were backstage. We don’t normally talk about the movie before we get on stage, but we were giddy because this movie was a treat.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Well, my question for you is why are we even covering this movie for this podcast? This should be an episode of Unspooled.

 

Paul Scheer Thank you.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And no, I will not guest on that episode.

 

Paul Scheer Oh.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I fucking love this movie. Full stop.

 

Paul Scheer It is. It’s an odd. It’s an odd movie.

 

Jason Mantzoukas It’s not, I disagree. It might present as odd, but it makes all the sense in the world.

 

Paul Scheer Well, there you go. I mean, there you go. And you know what I love about it? It’s finally a rom com for the dudes. Fucking fights! Vegas! Yeah!

 

Jason Mantzoukas Girls love a bad boy who fight MMA but has a consent app. It’s 2023. Bad boys use consent apps.

 

Paul Scheer He’s such a bad boy that he also knows a lot about biology. All right, we’re going to break this all down. But there’s someone out there that loves a romance, that loves a. Yeah, and she is going to break down all the plot with us. Please welcome my other co-host, Miss June Diane Raphael! Welcome, June.

 

June Diane Raphael Oh. Hi, Paul.

 

Paul Scheer How are you?

 

June Diane Raphael I’m okay. Period. Just okay.

 

Paul Scheer Now, June, your thoughts on this film?

 

June Diane Raphael Yeah. So. I’ve never seen a movie this long. This was the longest film I’ve ever laid my eyes upon.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And I would have liked more.

 

June Diane Raphael Jason. At a certain point, Paul and I were watching it in our hotel, and we stopped it, and I said, it’s gotta be almost all right. This has to be over. What else could happen? They’re together now. It has to be over. 42 minutes left.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, yeah.

 

June Diane Raphael 42 minutes left. And I said, Paul, I gotta get out of the room. And he said, where should we go? And I said, let’s get a Diet Coke. It was an emergency. We had to leave. We had to walk away. This was a struggle.

 

Paul Scheer This movie did require a snack break, an intermission, if you will. Like.

 

June Diane Raphael We took an intermission.

 

Jason Mantzoukas This movie rewards an intermission.

 

Paul Scheer Oh, yes.

 

Jason Mantzoukas When they finally fuck, and god damn, do they fuck. When they finally fuck and it’s all over and boom. And I’m like, oh, okay, nice. I’m watching it backstage at this venue. I’m like, oh, okay, I guess, I guess I’m all done. Boom. 35 minutes left?

 

Paul Scheer And you will be surprised to know the movie is only an hour and 34 minutes.

 

June Diane Raphael That can’t be true Paul. That can’t be true.

 

Jason Mantzoukas It is true. It is true. But I understand because all of act three is, in its entirety, a different movie with its own beginning, middle and end. Yes, as if it’s a short Judd Apatow movie.

 

Paul Scheer There is something bizarre because the premise of this movie is in the middle. Which is the bet. The bet. Like that would be a whole movie. Live with me for 30 days and then they fall in love. But that’s like introduced a half an hour in and then there’s like an hour after that. Oh yeah. Like that’s a, that’s an interlude. The that.

 

June Diane Raphael Paul even before that. There’s another movie in there, a movie I’d much rather see to be quite honest about Lucky 13 going to college, I’m like give me that. I’d love to see that movie.

 

Jason Mantzoukas How is the movie not starting with her as a child and then jumping us forward? Why don’t we ever get it? We get the briefest of hints of a flashback when when his dad. When Travis’s dad is like I heard tell of a gambler, a gambler in Las Vegas. They’re in Sacramento.

 

Paul Scheer No one, no one hears the tell of a a small time gambler in Old Vegas. Like it’s not even the New Vegas.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And all five sons are like, whoa, Lucky 13? We of course, all know who Lucky 13 is.

 

June Diane Raphael And here’s what I never got to the bottom of. I wonder if anyone has the answer up here.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Is it why are there so many fight clubs in Sacramento?

 

June Diane Raphael Well that part.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And are they still auditioning for that, that production of Titus Andronicus?

 

June Diane Raphael And also how did her and America know each other?

 

Paul Scheer Yeah. She maybe America’s also from Vegas. There’s a lot of questions. And the first one that jumped out to me was we see her writing an email, and we’re hearing it and voice over and we’re reading it on the screen.

 

June Diane Raphael That was a red flag.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And we’re also we’re also receiving in kind of visuals all the articles about Lucky 13. Yes, they’re giving us information, but no context, no understanding, no nothing.

 

Paul Scheer No. And my biggest concern was why is her font that big? She’s a young girl. Her eyesight should be very good.

 

June Diane Raphael Not only was it so big, it was big and it was bold.

 

Paul Scheer “Dear Dad.”

 

Jason Mantzoukas “Sorry I ran off. I need a fresh start.”

 

Paul Scheer Also, what I love about this movie is they set up this premise, Lucky 13. They don’t. I know eventually they get to it. But as an audience member, this was a question I had. I was like, okay, so she’s a poker prodigy. How the fuck that she play poker in a casino at 13?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Underground. Underground, they keep saying underground.

 

Paul Scheer There is newspaper clippings.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, I see what you’re saying.

 

June Diane Raphael So I imagine this is what I had.

 

Paul Scheer She was written up in all the papers.

 

June Diane Raphael I had to answer questions that the movie would not dare approach, and I, I thought I just had to assume that there were some. I’m sort of like junior Poker League that she played in. That there was some sort of kids poker league where they’re, you know, they’re playing Pokemon.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Here’s the thing that I like. I want to just draw your attention to, though, which I was truly mind scrambled at, which was this movie came out this year. Yes, it’s a contemporary movie.

 

June Diane Raphael I don’t accept that at all.

 

Jason Mantzoukas So the period in which she is Brian Austin Green’s, right? That’s right. Yes. Daughter Lucky 13 is 2013. It’s ten years ago. All of that took place in the era of the internet, in the era. And they’re acting as if she’s from the 40s. Like I heard legend about you. I heard you.

 

Paul Scheer Yes. There is this weird thing like, this is a time where phones, everything is in full, full speed. I will say this. What I love about this movie is there are jokes and they are making jokes, and I know that that is it’s a comedy, but sometimes it feels like the actors aren’t sure what the jokes are, because one of the first lines in the movie, she’s like, oh, and the showers suck. To which the lead character goes, I’m sure the showers don’t suck. I was like, okay, this is exposition like. Yeah. Why? Well, why would you doubt that? And why are you saying that?

 

Jason Mantzoukas When they’re having sex for the first time and she says, is it in? I was like, home run joke.

 

Paul Scheer Great job.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And when she’s drunk and saying, okay, you can turn around and she’s still topless all those times. I was like, this is killing me. This is good. The movie, I agree. The movie does itself so many favors by being funny instead of just. If this had been more, Nicholas Sparks. Yes. Right. We’ve done some of those movies. It’s more earnest or sincere. It would have been, I think, insufferable.

 

June Diane Raphael I have to push back here.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Please. Please. You mean, my contention that this is the funniest movie in film history?

 

June Diane Raphael I know, this is the third night of our tour, and I know we’re starting to lose our minds. But I had one laugh in the movie, and it was at the scene where she was topless. I thought that was really well played and I did genuinely laugh. But this movie and I, we talked about this word I’m about to use, Jason, yesterday. We said this word is overused and it’s lost its meaning, but I’m going to redefine it with this film and say the movie is cringe. It is so cringe. Everything about it. I was cringing, I was bracing, I need a massage. I was so deeply uncomfortable with what I was watching, and I was so upset about the jokes that they were going for and I and the sex joke. I actually was angry about that joke. Is it in? Because I’m like, all they’ve done here is wait for you two to fuck and you’re going to make a joke right now. Like, oh.

 

Jason Mantzoukas See, I, I really appreciated that they were also willing to let the romantic leads be silly, be goofy, tell jokes, be more not.

 

June Diane Raphael Jason.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Like the scene where throwing each other around the hotel room and destroy the hotel room I thought was very funny. Now, were there other were there other actors in those roles? I might have even been more impressed by it, but I liked that because if it had tried to be an earnest sex scene, I think it would have been more cringe for me.

 

June Diane Raphael Wow. Okay.

 

Paul Scheer I don’t disagree with what you’re saying, but I will say this that it feels to me like a lot of improv was used. And as somebody who likes to improvise, I will say, to the detriment of the characters because she is neither naive nor innocent as like she’s like I’m a sassy as you, and he’s like, well I’ll out sass you. Everyone’s fucking sassy. And I’m like, I can’t get a read on who is cool and who’s not.

 

June Diane Raphael I didn’t know. I kept on wanting to say to them, just be yourselves, just be yourself.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And then that’s the whole point is, though, is she’s not being herself. She’s like, I want to be a normal college person who denies myself. Myself would go with Travis. Travis is like my dad. I’m trying to not make chaotic decisions.

 

Paul Scheer But she doesn’t say that. Nor do we see her even transition. We see her on the bus like typing and we’re like, oh, you’re a normal girl. But I guess maybe she’s not. Later in the movie, about an hour and 27 minutes in, she goes. Now, the reason why I don’t want to be with Travis, I’m like, put that in the beginning.

 

June Diane Raphael And you know what Paul, I guess I have to say this, I didn’t like who she was pretending to be, and I didn’t like who she really was. I didn’t like either version of her, and I didn’t want to watch her for five hours.

 

Paul Scheer And regardless of the comedy, the reality of the movie, which is the go to this very exclusive college in Sacramento.

 

June Diane Raphael Is it exclusive?

 

Paul Scheer What? It felt like it was exclusive.

 

Jason Mantzoukas When I found out it was Sacramento, I lost my mind.

 

June Diane Raphael Sac town to the Mac town.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I was like, none of this is present in, the Greta Gerwig movie.

 

Paul Scheer When when she. This is this is like more of a cool lady bird.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Lady bird just shows up at a fight club. Lady bird like, let’s go to the circle.

 

Paul Scheer Well, this is this to me, is the craziest thing. Like, we’re introduced to this like it’s normal. It’s normal. It’s like, oh, my boyfriend’s taking us out. And then all of a sudden we’re like, in a dungeon from blade one. I’m like, oh, shit, is this a vampire movie? And then they walk in to a full on fight club and, and and it’s like all, we love Fight Club. This is, again, a movie made in 2023. Like, you got to come to Fight Club.

 

June Diane Raphael Listen. And by the way, call me grandma. That’s fine, but I didn’t think it was funny. I know you love the comedy so much, Jason.

 

Jason Mantzoukas The funniest movie I’ve ever seen. This movie is funnier than Anchorman.

 

June Diane Raphael I didn’t think it was a. And I think it was a funny meet cute for her to have blood splattered all over her. That was was that funny? That’s supposed to be funny?

 

Jason Mantzoukas No, that was insane.

 

Paul Scheer She was sprayed with another man’s blood.

 

June Diane Raphael And she’s into it. She’s into it.

 

Jason Mantzoukas She’s so into it that she. We cut to her. We cut to her masturbating in the shower. Except it’s not masturbating. It’s just aggressive shoulder washing. The movie is like she’s so turned on.

 

June Diane Raphael Who’s rubbing their own shoulders that way?

 

Jason Mantzoukas That’s all they can show is.

 

Paul Scheer That’s like in Star Trek, there was a an episode or a movie where, like, Kirk hits somebody in the kneecaps and they go oooh and they go, that’s where his balls are, you know? So maybe, maybe, you know, maybe she’s got one of those upper upper deckers.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Why? Oh Jesus.

 

Paul Scheer I don’t judge. I’m all about body positivity. You got an upper decker. You got one below the waist. Wherever you got it. It’s cool.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Do you think. Do you think, what’s the actor’s name who plays Travis?

 

Paul Scheer And the character’s name is Mad Dog.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Travis Mad Dog.

 

June Diane Raphael Dylan Sprouse.

 

Paul Scheer Is he a mad dog?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Mad dog? When Mad Dog is in all of these fights, right? What? He knows he’s got caught by surprise. Why is he wearing jeans the whole time? If I’m gonna be in a fight club and that is, that condones and nay encourages kicking. I’m not going to be wearing my jeans.

 

Paul Scheer Jeans don’t have that much give. Although I know Chuck Norris made a jean. A kicking jean.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, this. Well, this guy is not Chuck Norris. I mean, imagine if just swap it out. She falls in love with grizzled old Chuck Norris a little. A little fucking beef jerky in jeans, just going ham on people. I couldn’t I, you know, and I know I’m saying a lot of positive things about this. Don’t get me wrong, the movie is absolute nonsense. But looking ahead at the movie we have tomorrow night and knowing what we’ve watched in the past, boy, was this a breath of fresh air.

 

Paul Scheer Yes.

 

June Diane Raphael You know what? You’re right and, you’re right. It had a lot of elements that I. That’s that’s where I’m confused, because knowing what I know about the movies we’re forced to watch. You know, I, I’m not here with my own consent. I never signed a consent app.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Neither did she. Yeah, neither did she. She never signed the consent app.

 

Paul Scheer By the way, can we look at that consent app?

 

June Diane Raphael I need to see this piece of technology.

 

Paul Scheer We have a picture of it right here. So this is the consent app and it’s got some good details. It’s called consent date.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh this is interesting. She sent it to him. Yeah. Carmen is requesting sexual consent.

 

June Diane Raphael Yeah, because that’s the whole, the movie likes to play in like the post MeToo era of, like, can bad boys really be bad? And we’re there. They attempt to explore that. And it enraged me so much.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Yeah.

 

June Diane Raphael I literally was like losing my mind. But yeah, she sends it to him because he doesn’t want to get into trouble.

 

Paul Scheer Now is is he saying that he doesn’t want any Bdsm or is she saying she doesn’t want any?

 

Jason Mantzoukas This is hers. She is requesting. The hearts are hers.

 

June Diane Raphael So. But I’m confused about what allowed this.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What do you think allowed devices is? Do you think that’s vibrators? I guess so.

 

June Diane Raphael Allowed devices? I thought it meant like.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I’d love to see that drop down menu. Can we just click on that, please? Boop. Love to see what’s in that dropdown menu. Guess what I’d really like to see what’s in “more”.

 

Paul Scheer Animals or upper deckers.

 

Jason Mantzoukas A section that’s just “gross”.

 

Paul Scheer But I also just again, the writing in this movie always got me because the America’s Boyfriend brought our main girl to the Fight club, and then they meet for lunch the next day and he goes, so how was last night? You all went together. You seemingly all left together, too.

 

Jason Mantzoukas They did. Well, once they left, they stopped talking to each other. There was no recap of the night. There was no such a great time. Thanks so much. Nothing.

 

Paul Scheer How was last night? We all experienced it. Why do we need to reset the table? We, the audience saw it. They saw it with her. We don’t need to. All we need to do is establish that this man is a college student. Which the only way they get away with Dylan Sprouse, Zack from Suite Life of Zack and Cody.

 

June Diane Raphael Oh, wait. No no no.

 

Paul Scheer That’s Dylan Sprouse from The Suite Life with Zack and Cody and Above Deck with Zack and Cody.

 

Jason Mantzoukas That’s a Zack and Cody.

 

Paul Scheer That’s a Zack and Cody. That’s Zack.

 

June Diane Raphael So what’s so wild about that. For so long, you and I used to, like, take gummies and watch the Suite Life of Zack and Cody, and I can’t believe that that’s him. Wow.

 

Paul Scheer Well, I think a lot of people thought that Zack was the ugly brother. And then people, when they saw this movie said, oh, well, I guess we were wrong.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Can I ask a admittedly deeply naive question?

 

Paul Scheer Yeah.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Is he a known hunk?

 

Audience No.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Thank you women of New Haven. It’s exactly what I was looking for. Yeah, so I couldn’t tell because that was one of my questions. And and same with the. The, Ashley? Is her name Ashley?

 

Paul Scheer Yes.

 

June Diane Raphael Abby.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Abby?

 

June Diane Raphael Is she a known hunk?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Is she a known honey? Okay. All right, well.

 

Paul Scheer I guess what I will say. And this is something that is a well, that I just want to take the lid off of. We can go down at later. But there is a series of films that use the word “after”. Right? After We Collided. After We Fell. After Ever Happy.

 

Jason Mantzoukas These are all romance movies?

 

Paul Scheer Yes. Very serious YA. Yeah, kind of what you’re talking about. And Dylan Sprouse is in one of these movies. So much so that they actually show clips of those after movies in here. So when that roommate is watching TV and crying, he’s watching Dylan Sprouse in an after movie.

 

Jason Mantzoukas So it’s like a joke?

 

Paul Scheer Yes, because this is made by the same producers who make the after movies. Now this. Beautiful Disaster is also based on novels. So are the after series. Beautiful Disaster is the first book that has three follow ups and six.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Please tell me there are movies to match every one of those.

 

Paul Scheer Well. So we’ll get into some more a little bit later. But I will say this. So this is a series as well. But this is like I imagine the 50 Shades of Gray version of like the notebook version. If after is the notebook, this is the 50 shades of Gray. And what is it like?

 

Audience Member It’s like sexy. Like fanfics.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Okay, sexy fanfics. But based on what?

 

Paul Scheer Oh, wait. Hold on, let me get the mic. Do you let me get the mic to you? Because it sounds like you got some good information. All right, I’m gonna come down. Okay. What’s your name?

 

Audience Member Sarah.

 

Paul Scheer Sarah. Okay. Tell us what we need to know about the Afters.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Can I just briefly? Sarah, have you read all of these books?

 

Audience Member I have not, but I’ve seen the movies.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Okay, great.

 

Paul Scheer So let us into it.

 

Audience Member The after is based on One Direction fanfic, and it’s basically Harry Styles.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What now?

 

Audience Member It’s Harry styles basically abusing a woman who loves him for some reason, even though she’s being abused by him. And in this movie, actually, there’s a part where Dylan Sprouse throws a cup of something onto a guy and his shirt says, fucking Trevor, which is his character’s name in the other. So fucking Trevor is like a famous line from the Wattpad series from the, after movies.

 

Paul Scheer So this is kind of. And people are saying.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Give it up!

 

Paul Scheer Amazing.

 

June Diane Raphael Thank you so much.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Give it up for an expert. Give it up for an expert. Wow. I think we got to do the after movies. Right. Okay.

 

Paul Scheer I have a lot I have a lot to share as we go down this road, but I don’t want to just devolve it to just the Wikipedia because it is. Wow. I’m learning a lot.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What I will say about this that I really liked. And maybe this is the juxtaposition you’re talking about between the after movies and this movie is and I mean this. I liked that this movie was so.

 

June Diane Raphael Funny?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Horny.

 

Paul Scheer Oh, so horny.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I liked that these are young people actually being horny and turned on and horny, turned on by each other and experiences. And it wasn’t chaste and it wasn’t there talking about sex. I felt like in a way that I was like, this is what I want Sex Life of College Girls to feel like. The TV show. You know, that show is so chaste in a way that I’m like, no, I feel like these people are talking more explicitly the way that young people might.

 

June Diane Raphael I guess so, but I don’t know. It feels like a natural time to talk about the morning boner scene.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Do we have that on video?

 

Paul Scheer We do have it.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Can we watch the whole thing?

 

Paul Scheer This is scene four.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Here’s my question as we’re watching it, what’s making the cat sounds?

 

June Diane Raphael I don’t know. I don’t know.

 

Paul Scheer We will unpack it. Here we go. Scene four. We can’t pause it midway, so we’ll watch it, and then we can comment. Here we go. Scene four.

 

Movie Audio [Cat noises].

 

Movie Audio Not what you think it is. Abby.

 

Movie Audio What are you doing? (Screams)

 

Paul Scheer So. Are we supposed to believe that she is having a dream about a cat? And then when she touches his hard on, that feels like a cat?

 

Movie Audio What part of the cat is my question? What part of the cat does she think she’s touching?

 

Paul Scheer And if its tail, gross.

 

Jason Mantzoukas But also. I’m correct. Right? There are cat sounds.

 

Paul Scheer Yes.

 

June Diane Raphael Not only are there cat sounds, but every time she, like, grabs his dick, there’s a meow.

 

Jason Mantzoukas That’s what I mean.

 

June Diane Raphael Where is where is that coming from?

 

Jason Mantzoukas So my my guess is. Here’s my guess. My guess is somehow this scene came after the establishment of the cat that he gets in the later part of the movie. Remember, he comes home with the cat at one point.

 

June Diane Raphael Yeah, I remember that.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, was this meant to be after that? And that cat is still around because it is confounding that there are the. It’s almost like they’re hearing her dream.

 

June Diane Raphael But Jason. Even if the okay, there’s still so many questions. Even if the cat is still around, why would the cat respond only in those moments?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Okay, so then the only natural answer is.

 

June Diane Raphael Is the cat under the covers?

 

Jason Mantzoukas No is that’s the sound his dick makes. That’s the sound his dick makes.

 

Paul Scheer That goes to your theory every time she grabs it. We get it a meow.

 

June Diane Raphael And I’m also like, what is her dream exactly? Like, why is she so?

 

Paul Scheer Oh I got this cat by the tail. Oh, cat tail.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And but also it’s like she’s acting so playful, like, oh yeah, you cat. Hehehe. But it’s like, none of this is what you would do with a cat unless she’s strangling it.

 

Paul Scheer Why?

 

June Diane Raphael It was absolutely confounding.

 

Jason Mantzoukas That’s that’s when I was like, this is the best movie we’ve seen since The Pope’s Exorcist.

 

Paul Scheer Why does she immediately fall in love with the Frisbee dude? Like, immediately fall in love with this guy who looks. And no offense to this gentleman, he is not a young man. And I don’t mean that like he’s an older man. We have to. We have to be honest.

 

June Diane Raphael No less than 41.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Yeah.

 

June Diane Raphael Like not a day.

 

June Diane Raphael If he’s in college. This is because he never went to college originally. He’s like I finally.

 

June Diane Raphael No, he’s a professor. He’s a tenured professor.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Well that’s what I was going to say. I fully expected her to go to class and he was going to be the TA. He was going to be somehow, but I did I not I laughed so hard when she hits him directly in the nuts with that Frisbee, I was like, I’m in, I’m in, I’m in. She’s she’s she’s rubbing dicks. She’s destroying balls.

 

June Diane Raphael Wow.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I’ll take it. Please. Do you remember what we watched last night? Do you remember?

 

Paul Scheer Again, she says something again. This is like one of those jokes that is a non joke. Where she goes, he’s like, she’s like, you should put some ice on those balls. He’s like, you should put ice on my balls. And then they just continue the conversation.

 

June Diane Raphael I had so many questions about him, Parker, and we’ll find out later that he’s a Republican. But that’s coming. That’s coming later on. But, you know, they did him so dirty by just throwing that backpack on him because I know they wanted us to, like, take him in in a real hazy way and not focus too hard. But every time that grown ass man walked around, not with like one shoulder on, but both shoulders on that backpack. With that backpack, I was like, this is very sad. Well, and if this is a girl, if this if this man is in college, like, you’ve also just made this character so sad like it was.

 

Jason Mantzoukas They have to humiliate him.

 

June Diane Raphael I know.

 

Jason Mantzoukas They have to, because he’s in arguably the better choice of someone to date. Absolutely full stop. And that it is that she is constantly faced with him. He brings her ramen to eat in the library. I don’t think you can do that.

 

Paul Scheer I don’t think you can eat ramen. Yeah. I was like, it’s like, could you pick up more messy like thing that could wreck books. Yeah. It’s like it’s like thing I brought. I brought Benihana into this library. C

 

Jason Mantzoukas Can you imagine you’re working in the library. You are paying money to go to school in Sacramento. You are sitting next to someone who sleeps, then talks loudly and eats ramen with someone. Let it be like get the fuck out of the library.

 

Paul Scheer I do want to put this scene on. This is scene two the Frisbee scene only because. Look. You say she belongs with him. She bumps into him. There’s very little connection. And we’re supposed to be like that’s that’s our triangle. Really?

 

Jason Mantzoukas But that’s the same with Travis. The scene with Trevor, her whole romantic M.O. is bumping into someone, because, remember, she’s trying to leave the fight, and she’s like, I’m out of here. Bump!

 

Paul Scheer Oh, and hand on shoulder.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Gush, she’s like, dunzo she she. All she does is bump into people and fall in love. Oh, that’s all you did back. God help this woman on the bus. She’s like boom, boom. Oh, shoulders, shoulders, shoulders, shoulders.

 

Paul Scheer Let’s watch scene two.

 

Movie Audio Oh, no!

 

Movie Audio Oh my God.

 

Movie Audio Oh. He’s fine.

 

Movie Audio Oh, God.

 

Movie Audio Okay. He’s. He’s okay.

 

Movie Audio I’m fine.

 

Movie Audio Are you okay?

 

Movie Audio No. I’m fine. oh. Oh, God.

 

Movie Audio Oh, you’re so cute. And you’re crying.

 

Movie Audio I’m not. I’m not crying. It’s just the wind. How long have you been captain of the Frisbee club?

 

Movie Audio Oh, no, no, no, I’m not Captain.

 

Movie Audio It was a joke.

 

Movie Audio Oh, hi. Hi, I’m Abby.

 

Movie Audio I’m gonna go. I’m gonna go.

 

Movie Audio You should put some ice on your balls.

 

Movie Audio You should put some ice on my balls.

 

Jason Mantzoukas This is flirting in 2023. You should put some ice on my balls. Walk away.

 

Paul Scheer It seems like.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I’m going to say that to a girl later tonight in New Haven. I hope you guys can pick me up at the police station tomorrow. Here’s my question. Why did the movie need to tell us via text on screen, Tucker dormitory. Why identify this single building? In the entire movie, there’s never text on screen again, I don’t think. Oh wait, Las Vegas? Okay, I believe you.

 

Paul Scheer I think that they basically they had the the guy who did the Indiana Jones map to show you Sacramento to Vegas, the L-shaped drive. That same person was like, I got some extra time. You need anything? Make a make a graphic that says dorm room. Okay. Got it. Quick question for you both. Where do you think this was shot?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Where?

 

June Diane Raphael Toronto?

 

Paul Scheer Toronto. Okay.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Just because you’re asking. I’m going to say it’s weird because I would have said, like Baton Rouge or one of those. Yeah. South Africa?

 

Paul Scheer Bulgaria.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, you got me movie.

 

June Diane Raphael Wow.

 

Paul Scheer Bulgaria. This is all Bulgaria.

 

Jason Mantzoukas To be fair, that is also where Lady Bird was shot. Bulgaria stands in perfectly for Sac town, baby.

 

Paul Scheer I am kind of shocked. The whole movie. Like it’s such. It’s like easy outdoor. Like Bulgaria. What kind of tax breaks?

 

Jason Mantzoukas WhI’m now understanding some of the bad guys accents.

 

Paul Scheer Oh my God.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Wow wow wow. I mean, like, can I. And maybe I’ll also ask a question if there are young people in the crowd. I’m curious, is it just now that everybody’s always doing MMA fighting wherever they are? Such that genuinely a theatrical production on a college campus in America is just an octagon, so that Shakespearean characters can MMA fight each other? Like.

 

June Diane Raphael But was it? I was really confused about that because we didn’t hear any Shakespeare, did we?

 

Jason Mantzoukas No, we just saw them fight. But it was it was Titus. We keep being told that it’s the, that’s the production.

 

June Diane Raphael Wow.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What the. What is that? Why is there so much MMA and why is it not referenced that. Isn’t this weird?

 

Paul Scheer You can’t say isn’t this weird when a main character in earnest does the Macarena.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Yeah, there’s also and there’s also in Vegas, an advertised fight on a billboard in which the bad guy appears to be choking the lead with a chain to death. Is that part of what’s being advertised?

 

Paul Scheer They spent all that money on the billboard, but it’s in like a fucking dirty ass garage. Like it’s not a stadium.

 

Jason Mantzoukas It’s Bulgaria is what we now know.

 

June Diane Raphael I also had a question about Vegas. So when they again, they’re always she’s always running away from him. He’s not texting her back. I mean, that goes on. And it was exhausting. I’ve never have been so happy to not be single. It really exhausted me and upset me, but I. Sorry, Jason. But it’s just exhausting. I, when they when she runs over and kisses him in the hallway in Vegas, they stumble into a hotel room and have sex all across the hotel room and break things. And it’s set up as a comedic sequence that Jason really loved. He loves that type of comedy.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I laugh my ass off.

 

June Diane Raphael He loves that type of physical comedy that really lands and really works. And but I.

 

Paul Scheer I would argue that that was a funny sequence.

 

June Diane Raphael I did not. You know, again, call me an old shrew. I did not find it funny. But I, I kept on thinking during that sequence, is this their hotel room? Because she was she was going the other way.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Yeah. Or was this just an open room?

 

June Diane Raphael They seemed to just fall into the room.

 

Jason Mantzoukas There’s people at the door, their phone is ringing and police sirens are heard. So clearly they’re making so much noise and causing so much destruction. The police have been called, but the next cut is them in bed like nothing’s happened. He gets up, he runs out, she gets up, she runs out. There is glass all over the floor. There is more glass than in Die Hard. And they’re walking around and they’re fucking on the glass. It’s fucking bananas. They destroy the shower.

 

Paul Scheer They destroy everything. When she tries to get like, when they try to hook up on the minibar. She’s just throwing champagne glasses out of the way.

 

June Diane Raphael And will say, Paul. I know you know this, but, you know, someone came to our hotel room earlier this evening to blow up my hair because I get my hair blown out for all of you. That’s what I do for you guys. And of course, the moment I sat down because I’m still watching the movie, put my little earbuds and and of course I come right back into that scene.

 

Paul Scheer I know, and I’m five minutes behind her and she’s on the couch.

 

June Diane Raphael And neither of us explained to this poor woman like what we were doing. Like, why I and I know I tell the story all the time. It still confounds me like I have not explained to this stranger why I’m watching a sex scene in front of her for her to watch as well. Why my husband will be watching that scene right there over by the desk on his own computer and headphone.

 

Paul Scheer Taking notes.

 

June Diane Raphael Two minutes behind. It’s like I just can’t get over it. Yeah, and neither of us ever make an attempt to explain, like, oh, we actually are here for a show. You know, we just let it roll.  We live that out.

 

Jason Mantzoukas That person is telling this story on their date like, the weirdest thing I just saw.

 

June Diane Raphael Yeah.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Okay. Do you think that Travis, being that he is one of the leads of Titus Andronicus, is thought of as one of the college’s best actors?

 

Paul Scheer MMA actors.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Like, honestly, like, did they run up to the board to be, like, did I get it? Did I get did he audition for it? That he was like, he was like, I’m in. I’m in the play. I

 

Paul Scheer And you have to fight Chernobyl. Oh. All right.

 

June Diane Raphael I do think he’s definitely known as one of the best fighters, because Parker is so terrified of him.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, yeah.

 

June Diane Raphael To a comical degree. And I kept him thinking, you know, our our lead, Abby. Parker’s freaking out in the car about.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Get out of my car! Get out of my car!

 

June Diane Raphael And I did laugh at that part. I did laugh in that part.

 

Paul Scheer Parker delivers some good is at some points too dry and like at one point when he says, like, she’s like, how are your balls? He’s like, doctor says, I’ll never have sex again. Hold. No smile. Nothing. I’m like, these people don’t know where the jokes are. And maybe it’s Bulgarian casting. I’m not sure. But like, he delivered that, I’m like. But then you would go, yeah, doctor said I’d never have sex again. Come on give me a smile. Give me a smirk. Let me know that you’re in on your own joke. He does not.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Here’s the thing that’s crazy. That is kind of. And we’ve talked now for, I don’t know, four hours. How long have we been on stage? We’ve talked all this time, and only with the briefest of mentions of what I’m certain is the crux of the movie. The game, if you will, of the movie, which is it’s about the fight. And Travis and Abby make a bet. If, if if the guy. Travis says I can evade every punch, he won’t land a hand on me. And she says he will. And their bet is that she will have to live with him for a month. And then that’s the bet. And then that should be the structure of the rest of the movie.

 

Paul Scheer 100%. How to lose a guy in 30 days. It’s not. That’s not a section of a larger movie where there’s a Vegas heist at the end. It’s the movie is how to lose a guy like we’re going to see in 30 days, that movie will take place.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What then happens after we have watched long uninterrupted, the writer director must be obsessed with MMA, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the writer director of this movie was one of the fighters in the movie.

 

Paul Scheer Well, you know who the writer director is?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Chernobyl?

 

Paul Scheer No. Oh, I was going to say what he’s written, produced and directed. Cruel Intentions.

 

June Diane Raphael Okay, that’s crazy, because the entire time I was watching this, I was like, oh.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Now it makes sense.

 

June Diane Raphael It really does. Because the entire time I was watching this, I was like, I think I would really love this movie if she was Reese Witherspoon and he was Ryan Philippe. If they were in these roles and understood the comedy and understood what they were doing, like, I would really love this motion picture.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What I’m trying to figure out is, are these the Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe of now.

 

Audience No!

 

Jason Mantzoukas And the women of New Haven. You’ve spoken. But that is because I agree. That is because this does feel to me like edging closer and closer to Cruel intentions, wild things, things that are.

 

June Diane Raphael Yeah.

 

Paul Scheer And he also did that movie The Sweetest Thing, which was like that really gross out movie with like the sweetest thing was like.

 

June Diane Raphael Christina Applegate.

 

Paul Scheer Applegate. And Cameron Diaz.

 

June Diane Raphael Cameron Diaz, yeah.

 

Paul Scheer Like a sexy. It was like a gross out movie.

 

Jason Mantzoukas But but there is such a like the the fetishization of MMA and the fighting and all that stuff. I was curious about that, but then I can’t remember the point I was making about that. Shouldn’t he be wearing a mouth guard? Travis would have absolutely no teeth at the end of every single one of these fights. He’s never wearing a mouth guard so that he can flirt. “Hey, pigeon. I’ll be right back.” BAM BAM BAM.

 

Paul Scheer Well, he never gets anyone to punch him. June and I were shocked at this one scene that thankfully we rewound because we were looking at each other and we’re like, what happened here? He goes. And now I know I’m going to make a mistake, but let me show you where I was going. It’s like, I don’t want to have sex with you, bitch. And we’re like, oh, and he said, Pidge, Pidge.

 

June Diane Raphael And now I’m so glad we rewound it, Paul, because I was so stunned. I was so stunned. I never heard anything like it. And then.

 

Jason Mantzoukas To hear Zach or Cody say that.

 

June Diane Raphael I don’t want to have sex with you, bitch.

 

Paul Scheer Now, I would hear them say that to the doorman of that suite they were in, because he’s a real hard ass.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Here’s the thing you wouldn’t have had to rewind if you had closed captioning on. It is right there, baby. Anyway, I remembered what I was going to say, which is that the whole game is set up about this. He wins the fight. So now they have to live together. And you would have thought that would be the rest of the movie. And instead it’s just even though we’ve luxuriated in these fights, it’s just a montage.

 

Paul Scheer Like a five minute, a five minute montage.

 

Jason Mantzoukas This woman has come to. She’s left behind Brian Austin Green, her father in Vegas to go to college. There isn’t a single shot of her in that montage doing a goddamn ounce of homework.

 

Paul Scheer Well, sometimes when they show day one, they’re in and out of their bed so many times. Like, how much time are they spending in the bed? It was like, day 30th. Like, oh, day two, like five more times. Day three. I’m like.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, hang on a second. Keep in mind because this is a contemporary movie, seven of those days, they both had Covid, okay, so seven days of that month. And they were on a Paxlovid. They had both started Paxlovid, but at different times. So you could also tell they had the weird metallic taste in their mouths.

 

June Diane Raphael So they were really locked in that room. They couldn’t get out of that room for five days.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Because the roommates were like, no, no, no. You’re positive.

 

Paul Scheer By the way, the original conceit is so shitty because it’s like the shower is busted for 24 hours. It’s like, well, you can sleep over here. Why? Just use the shower and go back to your dorm? Agrees. Like, oh, I can’t have no place to study in your dorm room. It’s the shower like you don’t like or.

 

June Diane Raphael I know.

 

Paul Scheer It’s one day.

 

June Diane Raphael Also, I also really struggle because I feel like there was a lot left on the floor that they could have dealt with. Like the fact that she is a genius, a savant of poker. Like, let’s see those skills. Let’s see her read tells. Let’s see her strategize and understand.

 

Paul Scheer Well, it seems like her tells or her strategy is to make men sexually uncomfortable. Like she goes to that table like, oh, I was finger banging this person on Halloween. I want to fuck you. And then I was like.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, but that’s when she’s actually playing.

 

June Diane Raphael You mean when she’s playing poker. Yes.

 

Jason Mantzoukas None of her. None of her streetsmart skill set. Poker playing skill set. Is she using in any way, shape or form to advance herself inside of either the social structure or.

 

Paul Scheer What I’m saying is, I don’t think that she has more than just sexually grossing out dudes. Like, I feel like that was her. Like her amazing poker skills. It’s just being sexually inappropriate to men at the table. So that’s all we. We don’t see her count cards.

 

Jason Mantzoukas So you think her whole strategy is to be like, God had the worst diarrhea today?

 

June Diane Raphael So you think she’s been doing that since 13 years old?

 

Paul Scheer It’s. It worked better at 13. It’s weirder. It’s like watching The Exorcist.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Wait, what’s that, a tiger print? What do you want to finger me? I’m 13. Full house. The TV show.

 

Paul Scheer Like watch. Scene seven. But, like, at least in the movie, The Hangover, Zach Galifianakis, you know, he he gets a lot of things wrong. But then when he plays poker, he goes into, like, Rainman mode, and he can figure out all.

 

June Diane Raphael I would have loved to have seen that.

 

Paul Scheer But what we see is this. Scene seven.

 

Movie Audio You guys playing poker?

 

Paul Scheer No it’s Roulette. There’s a minimum buy in of five grand.

 

Movie Audio Look at it and you look nice. But this is a high stakes room.

 

Movie Audio Do yourself a favor and go to the main floor and pick out a shiny slot machine.

 

Movie Audio I can’t go back to the main floor. You see, I’m at this bachelorette party, and Sheryl invited this twat Terry, who hates me because Lyle finger banged me on Halloween, which in my defense, I thought that they were separated. So here’s my vibrator.

 

Jason Mantzoukas That’s hilarious. I’ll take what I can get. We were in Providence last night.

 

I want to go out to the crowd. I want to see what the crowd has to say.

 

June Diane Raphael Be careful, Paul, be careful.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Be careful,Paul. They’ve got a pizza out there. It’s full of clams.

 

Paul Scheer All right. Your name?

 

Audience Member Nancy.

 

Paul Scheer Nancy. And your question?

 

Audience Member How have we not put this together? That there isn’t another kind of lens to look at this. Travis and Lucky 13.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What does it mean?

 

Paul Scheer Walk us through.

 

June Diane Raphael Taylor Swift.

 

Audience Member This is the good girl and the bad.

 

June Diane Raphael Whoa!

 

Audience Member This is what this is all about.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Wait. What’s happening?

 

Audience Member So. Okay.

 

Paul Scheer This is good. Jason, I’m gonna let her break it down.

 

Audience Member I know you know this, and you can help me. Okay. So. Travis.

 

June Diane Raphael Kelsey.

 

Audience Member Kelsey.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, okay. Okay, I get it. Now I get it. Okay, okay.

 

Audience Member He’s trying to court the good girl. Miss Americana. And Lucky 13. He does some shifty things. Maybe like says, come and watch me in my arena.

 

Paul Scheer So you say that this movie is, this foretold the future?

 

Audience Member Yes.

 

June Diane Raphael Wow.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Holy shit.

 

Paul Scheer Wow.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, wow.

 

Paul Scheer So what you’re saying is maybe by Super Bowl. Taylor Swift will puke in Travis’s face.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, by the way, I loved it. I loved, I loved it. It’s only fair because he’s got blood on her face, so it made sense that she barfed straight into his face. Oh. So hot.

 

Paul Scheer YOh, let me get. Let me get a costume. And then you could come too. Sorry. All right, well. This is amazing. You’re in a costume. What is your costume?

 

Audrey from Little Shop of Horrors.

 

Paul Scheer I love it. An Unspooled movie.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Great. Great, great.

 

Paul Scheer All right, so what is your name and your question?

 

Audience Member My name is Jessica, and I wanted to know why she cut the hole for her money on the top middle of her mattress, when you could easily put it on the side.

 

Paul Scheer Good question. Yeah, she keeps all of her money. She cuts a hole in the top middle where she put it on the bottom or the side of it’d be easy to get to and not as uncomfortable to sleep.

 

Audience Member But your knees and your butt would get stuck in the hole when you. Yeah. Moved around.

 

Jason Mantzoukas That’s why I also, I also wrote that I thought it would be very uncomfortable to have a hole right where you sleep. Yeah, in the mattress. And I thought that was foolish of her.

 

Paul Scheer But great for Travis with that giant penis. They could just stick it right in that hole. Yeah, and sleep comfortably on his belly. Thank you for that question. I’m going to come to you. I’m going to move to you. People don’t have to come to me. But I just wanted to make sure. Yeah, you can come sit down with your drinks. Okay. Your name. All right. And your question.

 

Audience Member Nikki, I was going to ask if Abby is a virgin.

 

Paul Scheer I wrote this down too.

 

June Diane Raphael Such a good question. That’s why. Okay, so I wish this was the Taylor Swift Travis Kelsey, you know, backstory, origin story, because I wanted her to be more of a virgin. Kind of awkward, like, like math genius. Poker genius. And instead, I feel like the movie was telling us that she was somehow a bad girl before and was trying to rehabilitate herself and wanted nothing to do with poker. I don’t think she’s a virgin, but.

 

Jason Mantzoukas She’s categorically not a virgin.

 

Paul Scheer Wait, wait. No, no. But why did they count? He’s like.

 

June Diane Raphael Okay, one, two. And then she’s like, I can’t wait for three.

 

Jason Mantzoukas That’s just how people have sex now. That’s that’s how people have sex. Who here does the countdown?

 

Audience Member No no no. No. She kept pushing him away. Like when he started to, like, get into like her. She was like, wait a second. I have to go to the bathroom and talk to my friend first.

 

June Diane Raphael Yes. And I thought there was so much made. There was so much made of the moments of penetration. And that’s time I’ll never get back. I’ll just have to live with that. But there was too much made of that moment where I was like, is she losing her virginity?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Can I ask you a question? Do you think? Okay, because I’m genuinely curious if there had been a scene at the beginning of. Because I think the move with the movie is missing is context. Is context for her experience as Lucky 13 with her dad. If there had been a scene at the beginning where they are paper mooning themselves across Vegas, he’s getting into trouble and relying on her to get him out of trouble.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I’d love to see that movie.

 

Jason Mantzoukas She’s a child who’s responsible for a problematic, addictive father.

 

June Diane Raphael Probably like Zack and Cody were for their parents and their father for fucking ten years.

 

Paul Scheer How dare you?

 

Jason Mantzoukas And for the first time, she’s like, I choose me. I want to go to college and be normal. No?

 

Paul Scheer All right. Your name, your question. I’m Steve, Team Fred. And, I just want to know, June, do you feel like, with all this fighting,has it unlocked any more, secrets into what a street fighter is? Or?

 

Paul Scheer Is this a street fighter? From a question asked by a man wearing a shirt that says, “what exactly is a street fighter?”

 

June Diane Raphael You know, it. It is funny because when you were talking about MMA earlier, I did think to myself, I didn’t voice it, but I did think, what is MMA? What is it? What is it? I don’t really know. And I, I actually do assume it’s the same thing as street fighting, correct?

 

Jason Mantzoukas I don’t think so, because none of it happened in the street.

 

June Diane Raphael But it seems so lawless.

 

Jason Mantzoukas But it’s it did seem lawless, except that it didn’t like it was. Still, it seemed.

 

June Diane Raphael I didn’t see a referee in there.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Well, there was, but there was this. Oh, no, that was in the later fight. You’re right. Yeah. But there definitely was like the kind of idea of a organized it didn’t feel to me like in the first fight, one of them was going to die. Like, it wasn’t like one of the.

 

June Diane Raphael Is that MMA?

 

Jason Mantzoukas No. No, that’s what I mean. It doesn’t feel like. I feel like Street Fighter is like you fight till someone’s dead, right?

 

June Diane Raphael I guess we’re still asking the question.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I don’t know.

 

Paul Scheer Like all good art. I’m up here in the balcony.

 

June Diane Raphael Oh, careful, Paul. You have to be careful.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Ooh! Balcony monsters of New Haven.

 

Paul Scheer All right. What do we have here?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Careful, Paul. Be careful.

 

Paul Scheer All right, we’ve got a sign. Somebody has a sign that says “Paul, my uncle is your cousin.”

 

June Diane Raphael Oh, my uncle is your cousin like mine.

 

Paul Scheer There it is. So. Guess what? I got family here tonight. I do have family here tonight.

 

Jason Mantzoukas My uncle is your cousin. That’s the t shirt.

 

Paul Scheer Which cousin?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Paul. My uncle is your cousin.

 

June Diane Raphael Okay, there it is. All right. Hi.

 

Audience Member Hi, I’m Dave.

 

Paul Scheer Dave, what’s your question? Are you related to me?

 

Audience Member Not that I know of.

 

Paul Scheer Okay.

 

June Diane Raphael How many people in this audience are related to Paul?

 

Paul Scheer Guys, I have some family here tonight. Oh, let’s not talk about sex throughout the entire show. All right. Hi. Your question.

 

Audience Member Do you think the fact that Abby comes from a troubled past and is introduced to a toxic influence like Travis through her friend name, America, is a comment on the deaths of despair and the downward spiral of the middle class?

 

Paul Scheer There we go. That’s the question. This movie is deeper than you all realize.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Well, I mean, I would I would argue that the active B story of the movie is America getting fucked?

 

Paul Scheer The disdain that are.

 

Jason Mantzoukas No? Okay.

 

Paul Scheer The disdain that our lead character goes “A nurses costume?” As if that’s the most cliched. Like sex costume.

 

Jason Mantzoukas My favorite part of that was that it was first thing in the morning. I don’t know what you guys are up to, but I don’t wake up and be like, should we put on costumes to nobody.

 

Paul Scheer All right. Your name in your question?

 

Audience Member Hi. I’m Jason.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Now this guy get it?

 

Audience Member Aye. So we’re possibly non-consensually, violently destroying a hotel room and having sex. Why? And where is the cat that we hear when this sink breaks?

 

Paul Scheer Say it again.

 

Audience Member There’s a cat heard when the sink breaks.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, that’s. No, no! I’m so sorry, Jason. That’s his Dick.

 

Paul Scheer We have now established that.

 

Jason Mantzoukas It’s established in the earlier scene. His dick makes cat sounds. And so while they’re having sex, boy, is it purring.

 

Paul Scheer All right, these are great questions. I’m reticent to leave, but I feel like.

 

Jason Mantzoukas New Haven showing up. Wow. There’s two people coming at you, Paul. Watch out.

 

Paul Scheer Bring us home. What is your question?

 

Audience Member All right, so we see Dylan Sprouse’s ass an uncomfortable amount of times in this movie.

 

June Diane Raphael I only saw it once.

 

Paul Scheer It’s there twice.

 

Audience Member It’s there twice. It’s like it’s like four times okay. So if you remember, Dylan Sprouse is in Big Daddy with Adam Sandler, and he’s got the line “But I wipe my own ass.” So if you think of this movie as a sequel to Big Daddy, what does that do to the way we view it?

 

Paul Scheer Wow.

 

Jason Mantzoukas It just I just want people down here to know two men had to participate in the asking of that single question, the entirety of which is predicated on us having seen an Adam Sandler movie, which I have not. So my guess is.

 

June Diane Raphael We did see that movie for this podcast?

 

Paul Scheer We did not.

 

June Diane Raphael I just saw that movie on my own?

 

Paul Scheer That was one of the movies that we showed our children.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What?

 

June Diane Raphael Really?

 

Paul Scheer Yep.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Siri, call child Protective Services Los Angeles.

 

June Diane Raphael I thought for sure we saw that movie for the podcast. Wow.

 

Paul Scheer We have never done an Adam Sandler movie. Nor will we.

 

June Diane Raphael Yes we did. We did. Jack and Jill, one of my favorite movies.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I have huge news. We have not.

 

Paul Scheer We’ve never done an Adam Sandler movie.

 

Jason Mantzoukas But I will say.

 

June Diane Raphael Well, good, because it it should be on Unspooled.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I will say we’ve talked about it and you’ve had this exact same take, which is, I believe, why we haven’t done it.

 

Paul Scheer I’ve told June, we’ve talked about your memory. And I said to June the other day, I said, hey, it’s, 4:40. We got to go. You said, great. And you walk out of the room and you came and you said, Hey, it’s 440. We got to go.

 

June Diane Raphael Guys, women are doing so much, and that’s all I’m going to say. There’s so much labor that’s unaccounted for.

 

Paul Scheer Second Opinion people come on down.

 

June Diane Raphael That’s all I’ll say about that.

 

Paul Scheer Obviously we have opinions about this movie. There are people out there that love this movie is now time for second opinions.

 

Audience Member Hi everybody I’m Mike. This film is a saddening bore. I don’t want to watch any more. And now I could spit in the eyes of fools on Amazon as they rave about a douchebag fighting in his blue jeans. Oh man, look at that cave, man go. It’s Zach from that Disney show. Take a look at the pigeon bailing out a bum. Dad. Oh, man, I wonder if she’ll ever know he’s from 90210. How’d this get five stars?

 

Paul Scheer Amazing. Great job.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Excellent.

 

Paul Scheer Excellent job. Okay, here’s the deal, people. 4549 reviews.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And this is a brand new movie. Right? When did it come out?

 

Paul Scheer Brand new movie. This came out in April of 2023. Okay, the average rating is four stars, 59% are five stars. Jess writes “Decided to watch this during my lunch break, and within watching the previews, I was already hooked. I was waiting for a movie with Dylan Sprouse where he’s not a second choice to the lead actress. Five stars already hooked.”

 

Jason Mantzoukas Wait, is he normally, is he normal?

 

Paul Scheer Always. He’s in always.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Got it.

 

Paul Scheer The other series.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, oh, I see, I.

 

June Diane Raphael He wasn’t just saying Always.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I didn’t know if he was like that was his. If the twin brother was the hunk and he was the the dud. Cause they’re twins. There’s a hunk and a dud, right?

 

Paul Scheer Allison writes “It’s one of those movies where it comes into your life when you need it. In my case, I had a very recent breakup, and I given up on love and romance. The humor was a lightning addition.”

 

Jason Mantzoukas Do you agree, Jason?

 

Paul Scheer “Sometimes, you have to see it to regain faith. Plus Cole Sprouse. Damn, what a guy, I loved it.” Dylan Sprouse.

 

Jason Mantzoukas That’s the other one? Okay.

 

Paul Scheer She thought it was the other one.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I just saw a second opinion here that says I was blowing a woman’s hair out at a hotel, and watched 25 minutes of this movie over her shoulder. I found it chilling and upsetting. Why was she taking so many notes? And why was her husband watching it on a separate screen and taking somehow more notes?

 

June Diane Raphael And why is he just one minute behind her?

 

Paul Scheer Just a few minutes. Song man writes “I love you Virginia Gardner. Emoji smoochy. This was a comedy slash romance, enjoyable being a huge Virginia Gardner fan. Emoji heart eyes. Got a laugh. Almost a break up argument, then snap love and sex make out film comedy emoji laughing emoji.” That was a tricky one to read out loud.

 

Jason Mantzoukas I’ll be honest. We are crumbling as a society.

 

Paul Scheer Brianna Chatham wrote “Love! Emoji face hearts. The acting is honestly not the best, but I am obsessed with this movie. Maybe because I grew up on The Suite Life, but seeing Dylan all grown up and being hella hot just does it for me. The action is fun and the enemies to lovers vibe is cute as fuck. I literally watched it six times in two days. I was off work. Don’t judge me. Very cute. Five stars. Loved.”

 

June Diane Raphael Six times.

 

Jason Mantzoukas And what isn’t in there is that that person pushed send on that review and then drove off of a cliff. Even I, a diehard lover of this movie, say six is too many times in two days. This movie would have needed like a hundred more boobs.

 

Paul Scheer And I’ll end on this one right here from Leila M, “Imagine a Disney Channel original movie, but horny.”

 

June Diane Raphael Yeah. Know what? That’s. Yeah, I agree with that one. I do agree with that one.

 

Jason Mantzoukas In a positive way.

 

Paul Scheer I did some quick, research here. Okay. Virginia Gardener, 28, Mad Dog Maddox, 31, Frisbee in the nuts. Dude, 34. The, the dad, Brian Austin Green, 50. Which meant he had her at 22.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Well, but he seemed young. Right?

 

Paul Scheer Oh 50. Wait wait wait wait. No, no, I did my math wrong.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Like a young, young, normal, vibrant age for him to be.

 

June Diane Raphael 50s for sure young, Jason. 50s young on the pulse viral 50s totally young.

 

Paul Scheer Chilling silence was.

 

Paul Scheer But by way, I’m realizing.

 

Jason Mantzoukas New Haven is like no. You’re dead to us, old man. Wow, I’m the same age as BAG?

 

June Diane Raphael Here’s what I’ll say to you, Jason. To lift your spirits. I thought he looked great.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Oh, yeah.

 

Paul Scheer Here’s what I’m going to say. I just realized the piece of information that I’m wrong about. Virginia is 28, the actress is 28. But the character has to be younger than 21 because she’s not allowed to gamble. So she is a 28 year old playing, let’s say, 19. So how old is Frisbee Guy supposed to be playing at 34? 23? Wow. Thank you.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Why do you know?

 

June Diane Raphael Ma’am, ma’am.

 

Jason Mantzoukas The answer is medical school? Okay, so in order to be in medical school, you have to be 23 at least?

 

June Diane Raphael Well, what about Doogie?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Great question.

 

Paul Scheer What about Doogie?

 

Jason Mantzoukas Ma’am.

 

Paul Scheer That’s the shirt.

 

Jason Mantzoukas What about Doogie?

 

Jason Mantzoukas At the end of the day, they’re all too old to be playing these ages. But. But let me be clear. If actors that were the actual ages that they’re supposed to be portraying were grabbing even fake dicks in this movie, we’d all be like, no, I didn’t like this. I didn’t like watching this. This was uncomfortable.

 

Paul Scheer The age helped us.

 

Jason Mantzoukas If you watched actual 18 year olds grabbing dicks and this would have been chilling, this would have been kids. This would have been uncomfortable. So thank your lucky stars that everybody fingering in this movie is in their mid 30s.

 

Paul Scheer Now, what I want to tell you both.

 

Jason Mantzoukas So that you can enjoy it. You fucking creeps.

 

Paul Scheer What I want to tell you both is before this movie was released, you guys don’t know this. They shot a sequel and the trailer is here. Take a look.

 

Trailer Audio Travis. Oh whole relationship has just been this crazy pressure cooker. Neither of us have been able to let go of some steam.

 

Trailer Audio I have always wanted a bachelor party.

 

Trailer Audio Okay, let’s do it.

 

Trailer Audio Welcome to Catino Mexico.

 

Trailer Audio This is not about his needs. Put that down. It’s about your needs.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Wait a minute.

 

Trailer Audio What the hell?

 

Trailer Audio Hey, guys.

 

Trailer Audio This whole trip was a mistake.

 

Trailer Audio He wants you to fight for her. What are you doing? I didn’t know you wanted to come.

 

Trailer Audio You don’t see what’s staring you right in the face. Love.

 

Trailer Audio Abby. Love.

 

Trailer Audio Really?

 

Trailer Audio You don’t know what I need.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Is it 2024 yet?

 

June Diane Raphael That’s exciting.

 

Jason Mantzoukas Holyt shit. Wow. We. Wow.

 

Paul Scheer Wow. All right, now we all pose for our last picture. And thank you, New Haven, for this amazing show. You are an amazing crowd! We will be back. Thank you so much for coming! Thank you, thank you, thank you. Good night!

 

Great job! Eat shit, Connecticut!

 

Paul Scheer Thank you so much to the staff at the College Street Music Hall and our amazing tour manager, Beth Thomas, and everyone in the audience who made it such a great night, especially some members of my Connecticut family. If you want to feel like you’re part of the show, you can get yourself a shirt that we designed live with the audience at night. The shirt says Tucker Dormitory, Bulgaria. Then you can snag that shirt at Teepublic.com/stores/HDTGM and every shirt we made for the entire summer tour. And pretty much every show is available there. We are going on a UK and Ireland tour. While most shows are sold out, there are a handful of tickets left for London and some tickets left for Belfast, so head to HDTGM.com to get your tickets. My book, Joyful Recollections of Trauma is available for preorder. Have you not preordered it yet? Well, you better get to it because it actually helps me a lot. I don’t ask for much. I do ask for this, but here’s what I’m gonna do if you do it. Go to my website, show me your receipt, and I will send you an autographed postcard with a special message on the inside. I’ve already sent off like 700 of them, so I would love to continue to do it. I will do the first 3000 that register, and if you do that, you also get access to Paul Scheer’s Secret Scrapbook, where you get to see pictures and videos from my childhood that I won’t release anywhere else. It’s a special part of the website, so thank you for pre-ordering. I appreciate you. And you can get this book wherever you get your books, your audio books, your e-books, whatever you want. It all counts. All right. And if you have a correction and omission from this episode, go to our discord at discord.gg/HDTGM or leave me a voicemail at 619-PAUL-ASK. Then make sure you tune in next week to our Last Looks show. As we talk a little bit more about Beautiful Disaster and I will respond to each of your messages. Plus, Jason and I will stop by to chat about some TV and music that we are currently loving. And as always, we will announce our next movie. You can find us everywhere online @HDTGM. And last but not least, I gotta say thank you to all you listeners who support this show every week and our entire team who this show could not be done without. I’m talking about our producers, Scott Sonne, Molly Reynolds and our movie picking producer Avril Halley, our engineers, Casey Holford and Rich Garcia, and our associate producer, Jess Cisneros, who makes our amazing social media videos. That’s all I got. We’ll see you next week on Last Looks. Until then, bye for now.