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Jeff Foxworthy is at the door, and Mark & Pete are closing the borders with help from Attorney General Jeff Sessions (Paul F. Tompkins), former presidential candidate Jill Stein (D’Arcy Carden), prominent Trump supporter Velveteen Carter (Carl Tart), patriotic singer Miguel Wargo (Craig Rowin), conservative media personality Alex Jones (Henry Zebrowski), video game legend Mario and his talking hat Cappy (Jessica McKenna and Zach Reino), and maybe more. Secret alliances are revealed, murder will be attempted, and things get surprisingly intimate. Plus: Mark offers some words to live by.

DC musical legends The Capitol Steps (Baby Wants Candy’s Chris Grace, Ashley Ward, John Hartman and Scott Passarella) return to Hard Nation with catheters in tow, and songs about Sophie’s Choice, Laura Bush’s DUI, the complete history of America and Mockin Jay Pt. 1. Plus: Mark was in an all white male version of West Side Story, and Pete is taking a lot of Fentanyl. And don’t forget about Matthew Broderick…

White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders (Pam Murphy) returns to do shuttle runs around the Hard Nation studios. She reveals her true feelings about Hope Hicks, defends her handling of the Stormy Daniels scandal, and reads more real letters that real children wrote President Trump. Plus: Mark leads Pete on a meditative journey.