EP. 150 — Meta Millennial

[00:01:00] CHRIS: Hello to all my Hudson Valley enthusiasts. Beautiful Anonymous. One hour. One phone call. No names. No holds barred.

[00:01:14] THEME MUSIC: I’d rather go one-on-one. I think it’ll be more fun and I’ll get to know you and you’ll get to know me.

[00:01:25] CHRIS: Hello, everybody. Chris Gethard here. Welcome to another episode of Beautiful Anonymous. First things first, I want to just thank everybody who listens to the show and participates in the online community, the Beautiful Anonymous Facebook community. Tons of you guys have joined, over 31,000 people. People on Twitter, on my personal Facebook. You know, we’ve had a couple episodes in a row now that could have been very divisive, and it makes me so happy to see that, not only were the comments in our Facebook group handled quite respectfully, but I thought they furthered the discussion. And they gave me hope that maybe the Internet can be a place where people connect, discuss things, and nobody’s holding back their opinions. They just want to turn it into Internet lunatics like we so often do. Thank you guys for that. Really cool of you. Want to remind you, I’ve got road gigs coming up. I’ve got a little residency at Union Hall in Brooklyn, and I’m going to be all over the southeast in March. So go check if I’m coming to your city. Come out, do some standup comedy. Buy your tickets today. Let’s sell these bad boys up. Okay. This week’s episode — this week’s episode, it’s fun. It falls into, I think, an archetype, you know, a certain archetype. It is a young person looking for some direction. It’s someone who specifically wants to work in areas that are a little more boutique. They’re more passionate to her desires, which I thought was really interesting because, A, it ties right into what my recent book was about. I’m not gonna sit here and plug the book again. And I was like, “Oh, that’s serendipitous. You’re trying to just kind of get in your own lane and do your own thing. Yeah, I got that on my mind. Let’s go for it.” I will also say it made me laugh because last week’s episode I joked with the Rhino, the conservative caller, and said, “Would your nightmare be if your child wound up being a social media manager?” And that’s what this — that’s what this person does. It’s what this person does. Of course, you will see that I have personally turned a corner because in the beginning of the show, 2016, I think when young people would call, they wanted to do creative stuff. They viewed me as cool, and now I’m so not cool that I beg her to tell me I’m cool. And I just want to go ahead and apologize. Heads-up because it’s pretty pathetic. I hope you enjoy it. I know I did. Here’s the call.

[00:03:48] PHONE ROBOT: Thank you for calling Beautiful Anonymous. A beeping noise will indicate when you are on the show with the host. [BEEP]

[00:03:55] CHRIS: Hello.

[00:03:57] CALLER: Chris Gethard?

[00:03:59] CHRIS: Yeah, it’s Gethard.

[00:04:00] CALLER: What the fuck? This is awesome. I can’t believe this, but I actually got through.

[00:04:09] CHRIS: I’m glad you’re into it.

[00:04:11] CALLER: Are you kidding? I’m literally in a quiet room at my job, and I just, like, stopped everything I was doing when I saw your tweet because I obviously get notifications for your tweet. So it has to be on my phone because I do social media marketing stuff, which is, just, we can get into that later, but yeah.

[00:04:33] CHRIS: Yeah, so you can get away with it, is what you’re saying. They’re just gonna think you’re working really hard.

[00:04:38] CALLER: Yeah, exactly. That’s like, you know, the millennial’s dream. Right? But I mean, not really my dream. But, you know, that — How are you?

[00:04:49] CHRIS: How am I? I’m. I tell you what. Happy to report, I’m doing pretty great. I’m happy to report, feeling good. I just got back from vacation a couple of days ago. I went on an actual vacation, and I would say even more than other vacations I’ve gone on, I actually managed to turn off my brain and relax. So I feel good.

[00:05:09] CALLER: That’s tight. Where did you go?

[00:05:11]  CHRIS: I went to Florida!

[00:05:14] CALLER: — if you don’t mind me saying. Yeah? Florida?

[00:05:16] CHRIS: Florida. Florida for three weeks, and three weeks is a long time for one U.S. state. But I went and visited my folks, and I went to Miami. I went to Key Largo, and I went to Key West. And I tell you, the Florida Keys are something else.

[00:05:32] CALLER: Yeah. Yeah. You said it was like from your last podcast. Right? Like, not in America. It doesn’t seem like it, right?

[00:05:39] CHRIS: Yeah. You’re closer to Cuba than Miami when you’re in Key West, and you feel — you feel like you’re in a nebulous zone where you’re — where you are between two nations. And it’s — it feels like everyone there, like, you know, when you go, you know, when you go — How would I put it? Like, when you go someplace and there’s other Americans there, and you’re like, “All right, the American tourists have showed up.? It had that vibe, but you’re in America.

[00:06:07] CALLER: Yeah, totally. You know what? I’ve been having a problem with before, it is specifically with Florida, though. Okay. I don’t understand this. You know, I’m probably — people are probably going to hate this if, you know, this airs, but — See, I’m, you know, in my 20s, and there’s a lot of people in their 20s who instead of going to, like, Europe or, like, abroad somewhere, they go to fucking Disneyworld. Sorry, Sally. They go to Disney World. What? You’re paying one hundred dollars, two hundred dollars, to go see make, like, a sweaty man in a Mickey Mouse suit when you could go, like, away? Do you know what I mean, or is that crazy? Am I a bitch?

[00:06:51] CHRIS: Well, I mean, I’m not going to call you bitch. I’m a 38-year-old man. Just imagine if the podcast at this point in its history took that turn. If all of a sudden I was like, “You bitch!” And everybody was like, “What? Gethard, what happened to you on this vacation?” I would never say that. But I will go to bat and say that Disneyworld gets a bad rap. I think it’s rad.

[00:07:16] CALLER: I think it’s — Okay, it’s definitely cool. But wouldn’t you wanna go, like, maybe somewhere else?

[00:07:22] CHRIS: Yeah, I mean, do both. Right? But there’s some magic to Disney World, right? There’s some magic. I mean — my brother. I love my brother to death. But he’s really — because my parents, they spend the winters in a town not too far from Disney World. Some days we’ll go, and we’ll do Disney stuff. And I always getting excited. My brother’s always like, “Disney’s so lame.” And I’m like, “It’s also the most magical thing an American kid can do is go to Disney World.”

[00:07:47] CALLER: That’s true. That’s true. But I just feel like, I don’t know. I feel like if I only have so much money, and I feel like people — a lot of people my age only have so much money, and then they spend it on Disney World, you know what I mean?

[00:07:59] CHRIS: Well, you got to do it all, right? I resisted international travel. I was just very nervous. So I mentioned this on the show, and now my wife’s got me going to Sri Lanka and Chile.

[00:08:11] Caller: Wow.

[00:08:12] CHRIS: All these places. I’m really glad, really glad that I have been able to see it all, but I’m glad I got to see Disney World, too.

[00:08:19] CALLER: Yeah, I feel like I relate to your wife a little bit just because she’s — I think we’re from similar areas like the Hudson Valley.

[00:08:28] CHRIS: Uh huh.

[00:08:29] CALLER: Westchester County area. I love that area.

[00:08:33] CHRIS: Yeah!

[00:08:34] CALLER: It’s the best.

[00:08:35] CHRIS: I’m on real estate sites all the time debating Jersey or the Hudson Valley? Where am I gonna wind up in a couple years?

[00:08:42] CALLER: Hudson Valley.

[00:08:43] CHRIS: But I’m a jersey guy. I mean, through and through.

[00:08:46] CALLER: I know.

[00:08:47] CHRIS: Jersey, I’m like —

[00:08:48] CALLER: So, she probably wants —

[00:08:50] CHRIS: We both —

[00:08:50] CALLER: — the Hudson Valley now.

[00:08:51] CHRIS: Well, we both go back and forth because the Hudson– It’s funny. I feel like Jersey has– there’s some towns out there that have amazing schools, and I love the people. I mean, I grew up at — the Hudson Valley offers a lot more opportunities to, like, go live in the woods and have everyone leave you alone. So I like that.

[00:09:09] CALLER: Yeah, but there’s like a bunch of trains that are accessible. I actually saw you in Woodstock.

[00:09:15] CHRIS: Saw me in Woodstock?

[00:09:17] CALLER: Perform.

[00:09:17] CHRIS: Oh. At the colony.

[00:09:18] CALLER: Yeah. And who was that guy who, like, was harassing you?

[00:09:22] CHRIS: Oh, there was a maniac. Yes. One of the many shows I’ve done where there was a — I do a bit where I ask people how they would prepare for the apocalypse. And this has happened a couple times where people — there’s some people who forget they’re at a comedy show, and they get extraordinarily serious about it. And you realize, oh, this. I realized that night. And I remember that night. “Oh, this person is a for-real doomsday prepper. He’s drunk.” And then, you can vouch for me, I’m not exaggerating when I say that this is the first bit I did, and I would say within 15 seconds of asking that question he was actually trying to get onstage with me. He’s approaching the stage, which is wild and scary.

[00:10:00] CALLER: I know. I could see the fear in your eyes. I was in the front row. I was like, “Oh, man. Poor Geth. Yeah. It is awful.” I don’t know what I would do if —

[00:10:11] CHRIS: I tell you what, it’s — It’s a weird tightrope act, too, because, you know, a lot of venues, security will be right on top of that as soon as someone gets up, and it didn’t happen in that case. And not because, you know, everyone who ran the Colony is so cool, so cool. And I think they booked great shows there. But I think it just happened so fast. It happened. It was just immediate. So no one was there, and the guy got right up to the edge of the stage. And it’s that weird thing where you’re like, “Well, it’s a comedy show, I have to do an hour. I have to keep everybody comfortable, because once they feel discomfort, it’s hard to get them laughing. But also, if this dude gets onstage, I might wind up in a physical fight in front of this audience because it seems — this seems crazy.” So there was fear as far as the physical fight aspect and fear as far as, like, I had to put on a show, man. Yes.

[00:10:58] CALLER: Yeah, that dude was wasted. He was catcalling me in front of my boyfriend, just ruthless. But you know what. Hey, that happens. It happens.

[00:11:12] CHRIS: I did. I did that same bit in Oakland. Listeners in Oakland who came out to the show will remember — I believe it was Oakland. Was it the Oakland show? I think it was Portland. No, it might have been Portland, which was — this is important. It was one of those two cities. Someone will tell me. Someone in the Facebook group will remind me which one it was. But I did — I did a show where I did that same bit, and a guy gave an answer that was really grim and serious. And then he kept talking throughout the show. And at one point I said, “You know, I want to tell that guy to quiet down.” But his answer about the apocalypse was so scary, I’m scared to yell at him. And he goes, “You should be scared, man. You should be scared.” And then he said something about how he wanted to shoot people, and the security came and kicked him out. He can’t be kidding. Can’t be threatening mass shootings in a performance venue in 2018.

[00:11:58] CALLER: Definitely not. Definitely not.

[00:12:08] CHRIS: But I love my life. I love my life. And I love my jobs. Anyway, let’s talk about you, my friend.

[00:12:15] CALLER: Well, that was a good segue because I love my life, but I don’t like my job. I’m gonna be honest.

[00:12:23] CHRIS: So you’re social media marketing?

[00:12:26] CALLER: Yeah, social media marketing. But I started as a designer, as a graphic designer. And basically I helped them run the Twitter while I was doing that. And now all the sudden, I’m a social media marketing marketing assistant, which is some — this, like, totally not what I want to do. I went to school for — I went to SUNY New Paltz. I know you know SUNY New Paltz. It’s the best.

[00:12:57] CHRIS: So you’re a true Hudson Valley soul. You’re a true Hudson Valley soul.

[00:13:05] CALLER: Yeah, I’m a Hudson Valley girl. I love it.

[00:13:06] CHRIS: That’s amazing.

[00:13:07] CALLER: I definitely want to move back eventually. Yeah, it is incredible. It’s just so beautiful. And the people that don’t — are not from New York or the Tri-State area, like, they do, like, “Oh, you’re from New York.” But I’m like, “Yeah, but not the city. But, like, it’s better. Not say that it’s bad in your city. They’re completely two different beings, but –“

[00:13:27] CHRIS: It’s different.

[00:13:28] CALLER: Yeah. I’m just saying —

[00:13:29] CHRIS: That’s the thing.

[00:13:29] CALLER: So it’s different, and there’s so much more to New York.

[00:13:31] CHRIS: And even, I think a lot of New Yorkers don’t realize, like, oh, you can drive 45 minutes to an hour and it’s just a totally different and very relaxed culture. It’s great.

[00:13:42] CALLER: For real, it’s the best. Anyway.

[00:13:44] CHRIS: So, we’re gonna wind up talking more about the — this is going to become a promo ad for Hudson Valley living as much as it has. So did you —

[00:13:51] CALLER: That’s fine.

[00:13:52] CHRIS: Was it like there wasn’t enough design work there, or did you prove that you were just like a natural at the social media stuff to the point where they just kept putting more of that on your plate?

[00:14:01] CALLER: I think the latter. Yeah, I think, like, and I don’t think I’m the best graphic designer either, but — because I didn’t go to school for graphic design. I’m definitely an illustrator. Like, I draw. But they needed a graphic designer at the time. So, like, I know Photoshop, sure and so and then they’re like, oh, well, we like her so. And I started doing social media and now — but they never really asked me or I never applied. I just had, like — that’s just where I landed, and now I’m not very happy. But also health insurance is tight, so I don’t really want to leave.

[00:14:43] CHRIS: “Health insurance is tight.” You have proclaimed yourself a millennial prior to this, and I think you just proved you’re millennial bona fide with that sentence.

[00:14:51] CALLER: I know. Listen, I’m not going to hate the fact that I’m a millennial. Everyone hates millennials, but —

[00:14:57] CHRIS: I think it’s a mistake.

[00:14:58] CALLER: Hey, I think we’re tight. Yeah.

[00:15:00] CHRIS: Yeah, I think it’s a mistake. People — here’s what I don’t get about, because it’s — I’m right on the — I’m an xennial. They call me right between Gen X and millennials. It’s become very in vogue even for people in their late 30s, 40s to hate on millennials, and I wonder why my generation is so quickly forgetting that the younger generation always proves to advance things. Like, why are we forgetting that we felt that for our generation when we looked back at the 60s, and we see, you know, I think that’s for a lot of the people my age. That’s when we start to see, oh yeah, youth movements always advance. Why are we forgetting that? And why is everybody taking a big old steaming dump on the millennials? Millennials are going to — they’re going to make their mistakes, but they’re also going to save us. Man, got to believe in.

[00:15:49] CALLER: That’s what I’m saying. Exactly. Well, that’s what you think, but I agree totally. Yeah. Like, I hate — I really detest when — especially when females are like “I’m — this generation isn’t for me. Like, I wish I was in the 60s.” And I’m like, “Oh yeah? You do, really? You wish you could just, like — we’re like a little oppressed all the time?” Like, no, like that. Like, I mean, still there’s a — we’re still oppressed but not as much. You know, I can still wear my smashed patriarchy earrings, you know, out in public. You know, I mean, it’s just like a different time. Like, it’s this is — I mean, I mean, with everything going on in the world right now, it’s really a scary time. But also, you know, generally speaking, a pretty amazing time to be alive and everything that has advanced. I think so.

[00:16:47] CHRIS: So people hate on millennials. You are a social media marketing assistant. How does it feel knowing that many “people who hate on millennials point at you specifically as the type of thing where they go. What is that? I don’t even know. What is social media marketing?” How does it feel to know –?

[00:17:03] CALLER: Well, you know, social — social media, like, is so much more complex than we think it is nowadays because it’s, like, the number one way of marketing and selling things and promoting yourself. Like, not even — even though I don’t love my job, I still, like, learn so much about my other — my side. I’ve pursued two major side gigs that I would like to be in my actual career. And, like, I’ve learned so much of promoting myself through those — through this job. So I have one — so, you know.

[00:17:40] CHRIS: Okay. Now, are you working for some sort of big brand or corporation? You don’t have to say what it is. It’s probably best that you don’t. But are you working in the corporate sector?

[00:17:50] CALLER: It’s not technically corporate, but it’s a — it’s a very — it’s a pretty, very well-known company.

[00:17:56] CHRIS: Okay. Okay. So you’re working for the man with the — here. Hey, here’s a question I got for you, because I was — I’m not kidding when I said I was reading an article about this on my way into the studio today while I was on the train. There’s lot — a lot of thought right now, social media about, you know, it’s at a certain scene. At a certain point in history, it seemed like a positive thing connecting us. Now it seems like it’s becoming an avenue for tribalism and a lot of outrage and a lot of divisiveness. And I was reading an article today that basically posits the theory of it doesn’t have to be that way. And that’s actually intentional because the most popular posts are the divisive ones that bring about outrage. So algorithms are built to amplify outrage and negativity specifically for the purpose of advertising. The more people get addicted to the platform, the more you can sell stuff to them. So the more outrage and divisiveness you create, the more addictive it is to the human brain. How do you feel being part of a part of that machine?

[00:19:07] CALLER: Not great. Now that you say it like that. No, I mean. Yeah. That’s like — but that if you actually think about, like, how everyone gets some sort of fame, it’s through divisiveness. It’s really through, like — like, I always talk about how Kanye West, like, everyone’s so outraged with him right now, and I totally get. It’s totally valid. He said some awful shit, but, like, he loves Donald Trump, right? And Donald Trump in my eyes, got the presidency the same way. Kanye West got his fame —

[00:19:47] CHRIS: Yeah.

[00:19:48] CALLER: Which is, like, he says crazy stuff and gets people riled up right before he releases a new album. And I do — I don’t want to say too many people, but I kind of like Kanye West music. You know, I do. But, you know, him as a person, I am a little wary on. Donald Trump on the other hand, I despise. But it’s just like, doesn’t it totally make sense to me that Kanye West would love Donald Trump? You know, he made — kind of got his presidency from being controversial because people liked it, and a lot of people hated him. But, you know, he was always on the news. He was always, you know, in front of people.

[00:20:28] CHRIS: Yeah.

[00:20:29] CALLER: Here we are.

[00:20:30] CHRIS: Look at that.

[00:20:31] CALLER: So it makes sense what you said about the social media.

[]00:20:35] CHRIS: And your current job is about how to harness — how to harness all that so people might buy goods that your company sells.

[00:20:48] [AD BREAK]

[00:24:39] CALLER: It’s a good company. That’s — but the message is —

[00:24:42] CHRIS: Good.

[00:24:42] CALLER: Good. Message overall is good, which is nice and not working for some evil corporation. Well, that’s — what I’m doing, it’s kind of soulless and it’s disconnected from what our general message is. I mean, I’m, like, selling the stuff on social — what’s it’s, like, just not what I want to do. Like, I like — I like this. I like — I like talking to people.  I like my other side.

[00:25:07] CHRIS: You do? Yeah. Yeah. I was just going to — I said, you got two side gigs that you like better, huh?

[00:25:11] CALLER: Yeah. Well, again, like, I want to be an artist, and I want to be an illustrator. And so I hope I get commissioned to do, like, album art or movie posters and stuff like that. So I do, like, very, like, detailed line work stuff. And then my other one, which I’m saying — I know you probably hear that a million times. But I have a podcast, so that I’m trying to, you know, make — make a thing out of. I really — I love to, like, just be a podcaster, an artist. Can you imagine? You can imagine because that’s your life.

[00:25:48] CHRIS: I can imagine. But good luck. The unreachable dream. If there’s anybody who is proof positive, you can be those things, it’s this guy. But I hope you’re ready to just eat it 10 years.

[00:26:01] CALLER: I know. I’m ready. That’s the thing. That’s my — that’s my dilemma is that, like, because I go to this 9:00 to 5:00 job and I’m here from 9:00 to 5:00, probably longer most days because I come in kind of late, most days, but. And then I had — and then I get home, and I just want to watch some fucking Real Housewives of Atlanta or something. You know, just turn my head off. If I didn’t, I, you know, have to work on my art or my podcast and stuff. And it’s just it’s tiring, and I would love to just commit to it. Once you commit, you can really start doing shit. And like, I just feel like I can’t commit fully to actually I’m passionate about, and I have committed a lot to my podcast. And I’m doing — and I’m talking a lot of cool topics. And I’m really trying to do it, but it’s still a lot of work.

[00:26:53] CHRIS: Well, can I — I’m going to ask you one favor from me. Just a personal favor you could do me. And I’m saying this — there’s a very — there’s — there’s sometimes this weird thing where multiple contradictory things can exist at the same time. So I want to let you know that 100 percent —

[00:27:12] CALLER: Okay.

[00:27:13] CHRIS: I’ve been where you’re at. What you just described, I’ve been there. We’re stressed out and where you’re like, “Man, I hit the couch. And the show is just. I know this show is just like empty calories, and I should be putting my brain energy elsewhere. But I work too hard at this thing that I hate. And now it’s hitting a point where I’m tired and I kind of got to go to bed because I gotta be up anyway. And I got yelled at for being late today. And I didn’t even draw anything. I didn’t do any work on the pilot.” I know that feeling, and I know it sucks. And it’s true that it sucks, and it does. It’s real. And I’m not invalidating when I say that. I just want you to do me a personal favor. And also understand, you just described something really beautiful, too. And you might look back on this in 10 years and remember, this is one of the golden areas of your life. So don’t forget that either. Cause I think back to that stretch of my stress, and oh my God, do I wish that I gave myself permission to enjoy it more. Me and old Bobby Moynihan sitting in a booth at the Peter McManus Cafe, on 19th street Seventh Avenue, been out doing shows,  “How come we can’t get anything to click? All these other people getting jobs, man. You gotta watch my back. I got to watch yours.” And then I drive back to Jersey. He drives back to Eastchester because we both still live with our parents and just wonder what the hell we’re doing. And that stress was so real. But I look back now and I realize, man, I really got to live. I really got to live. Yeah. And I wish — I, I wish I realized that more. And I think you might be having that, too. Let both of those things be real. Let them both be real.

[00:28:51] CALLER: Yeah. For sure. No. You’re totally right. And I definitely have an awesome situation. Like, an incredible situation with my living situation — with the people I surround myself with in my — and it’s — I’m blessed in the fact that my main dilemma is I don’t want to be at a job that make that gives me a salary. You know, it seems like that’s like a really good thing. I’m totally aware of myself with also, like, you know, I just want to be an artist.

[00:29:24] CHRIS: Of course, of course.

[00:29:29] CALLER: And also, like, my — yeah. And, like, my — my mom is totally for me. It’s just like being an artist. My dad’s kind of like, “You should stay at your job.” So that’s another dilemma. It’s just like, you know, but, one, but I can totally prove him wrong. Once I get my feet on the ground with everything else, I just gotta do it.

[00:29:50] CHRIS: I think you gonna. How do we get you to commit more? How do we get you to commit more?

[00:29:55] CALLER: I don’t know. I mean, like I’m doing a podcast for sure. Like, I have my sound guy that I pay, you know. And then I get —

[00:30:05] CHRIS: Jared, you know, you have your Jared.

[00:30:07] CALLER: I have guests lined up.

[00:30:09] CHRIS: You have guests?

[00:30:09] CALLER: I have my Jared and Harry. I talk to them a few times, and then I have guests. And they have my equipment, and I have a place to do it. And I — I just got some really cool guests on that have somewhat of a following. So that’s good. And, you know, I actually follow one of the girls that want it like a early episode that was starting a podcast. I think I don’t want to say her name, but I follow her on Twitter and I follow her podcast endeavors that came on your show about starting a podcast. And she had a really emotional, like, amazing episode.

[00:30:47] CHRIS: Of this show?

[00:30:48] CALLER: Yeah! Yeah!

[00:30:49] CHRIS: So we’re now falling back into a chronotope-like situation here where you follow the pod. You are someone who wants to put more time into your podcasts, and you, one of the people you follow is someone else who has talked about their podcasts on my podcast.

[00:31:04] CALLER: It’s inspiring. It’s inspiring. Just meta, that’s all.

[00:31:10] CHRIS: Okay. Okay. Yeah.

[00:31:14] CALLER: But, yeah, so I think I’m committing to that. I could commit more. You know, also another part of that is the social media marketing for the podcast, which I’m you know — luckily, I do know a little bit of graphic design. May not be the best, but you know that. And then, you know, doing that for the Instagram and Facebook, and there’s a lot that goes into it. Not that you wouldn’t know.

[00:31:44] CHRIS: Harry Nelson just told me he’d happily be a guest on your podcast. Harry Nelson, man of mystery, will step up and you can give you the real dirt. I’ll give you the real dirt on your podcast.

[00:31:56] CALLER: If I find whoever I can email. I will e-mail them and have them on my podcast.

[00:32:00] CHRIS: All right. I could see he’s into it, this sick game. Harry’s playing with us. I’m gonna go ahead and say this on the show: for a while now I feel like Harry’s been trying to undercut me and use this platform for his own personal promotion purposes. I feel like that’s actually quite a good going on for a lot. I want, you know, I’m onto it, Harry. I’m onto it. This guy’s trying to stab me in the back.

[00:32:25] CALLER: You gotta get in wherever you can.

[00:32:27] CHRIS: If I just want to put out there to the listeners of Beautiful Anonymous. If some day I disappear, and with no explanation, Harry is the host of the podcast, that was an intentional scheme that he’s been trying to execute for the better part of a year.

[00:32:42] CALLER: Dang. I’m ready for the conspiracy theory. Big conspiracy theory fan.

[00:32:46] CHRIS: It’s a coup. It’s what they call that. Now I would like to — okay. All right. Hmm. Let’s figure something out on our feed — I want to figure, the infrastructure, something I — Here’s what I’d like to do. So are you — you’re producing your podcasts independently right now, or are you with some sort of — some — are you under somebody else? Some umbrella? Are you with a company?

[00:33:14] CALLER: No. I’m doing it independently. You know, not that I haven’t emailed every agency, including Earwolf, about wanting any job.

[00:33:26] CHRIS: Okay, okay. Now. Okay. Now, okay, here’s the thing. So this is — you’re doing it independently. That’s an uphill climb. You are — some people want to stay independent, do like the patreon route. I think that’s really awesome and commendable. You are someone who would be interested in working with a company. I happen to have inroads here at Earwolf, and Stitcher, obviously. I — I don’t want you to break your anonymity. So let’s not get too specific. Don’t say the name of your podcast. But if you want to go ahead and pitch the premise of your show, what you think sets your show apart, makes it special. I will make sure that the powers that be at Earwolf, listen to your pitch. Harry and Jared, will you guys commit to making sure that this pitch is heard by the powers that be? Getting two thumbs up from Harry, but you can’t trust this guy as far as you can throw him. Harry saying — Harry saying he’ll make sure Chris Thanen hears this, but that he demands to be the co-host of your show should it work. So let’s go ahead. How’s that sound? And then maybe there will be a new show in the Earwolf family that all the Beautiful Anonymous listeners can realize, “Oh, this was the miracle because this girl crushed her pitch on Beautiful Anonymous.” Does that have appeal to you?

[00:34:45] CALLER: That would be amazing. Okay.

[00:34:49] CHRIS: I’ll tell you what, though. I’ll tell you what. Can — can we make another deal, though? Because this is fun, and it’s a game. I’m going to go ahead and say, too, if we do this, I’m going to ask you the real hard-hitting questions, maybe give you the real hard-hitting notes that I think you would get in a pitch with a company if it came down to it both because that’ll be entertaining for the listener and because I think it might help. Yeah?

[00:35:12] CALLER: Yeah. Hell, yeah. Are you kidding? This is my frigging dream. And I’m, like, about —

[00:35:17] CHRIS: To be given notes — to be given notes on your passion project that hundred thousand people will hear. Okay. Okay.

[00:35:24] CALLER: I can’t frigging wait to tell my boyfriend this. He’s gonna freak out. He got me your book for Christmas.

[00:35:29] CHRIS: It’s available in bookstores now. Wow.

[00:35:34] CALLER: Anyway. Okay. So basically the book, the podcast without saying the name, which I really want to. But, but, you know, I probably shouldn’t, is — I feel like — so I feel like a lot of people talk a lot of shit. Sorry, Sally, About things they have no idea about. So I think, including myself, especially once this upcoming election happened, I just pretended to actually know all the bad things that were happening. But really, I had no idea. I was just angry for just, so people would know — think I was aware, but I wasn’t. And that goes along with every — everything that we talk about. We — no one actually knows what we’re talking about unless you are an actual expert in what you talk about. So from things including, you know, things such as medical marijuana to bitcoin to politics to anything that people pretend to know about, I bring on experts and I actually get the actual info so people can actually be aware of what these things are and instead of just talking out of their ass. I feel like that should be the name of the project. Stop talking out of your ass. Because I just think that a lot of people talk about things they don’t know about. And so I want people to stop yelling at each other and start listening to the people that actually know what they are talking about.

[00:37:00] CHRIS: Okay. Okay. So you want — It’s a podcast that openly admits, “I am someone who has fallen into talking out of my ass. I’d rather bring on experts and hear from the horse’s mouth.” I like that.

[00:37:15] CALLER: Yes. I feel like people can actually learn if they stop just talking and yelling, like, just listen to people and ask decent questions. I think you do this with your podcast. You’re definitely, obviously, a huge inspiration for my podcast. So, yeah. Okay. And it’s like, you know, and I just talked to really interesting people.

[00:37:37] CHRIS: Now, first — okay, first question. I feel like the idea of bringing on experts in fields and talking to them is something that there are — there are podcasts that do that. What sets yours apart?

[00:37:53] CALLER: Well, I know Jonathan, whatever his name is from Queer Eye, I literally put out my podcast and then I saw — then that I found out that his not, like, well, here we are. But I think I have like a very real conversation. It’s not very factual. I’m very — kind of just like shoot — shooting the shit with these people. And, like, actually just having it just so people will actually want to listen. No one wants — what I’ve learned is that in, self included, no one really wants to sit down and listen to the facts and like the statistics and everything, like, it takes a special kind of person. I think that’s awesome if you do. But I would rather just like have a casual conversation like you and I are having right now, talk  about — let’s talk about a certain topic. It’s just, like, kind of, like, I’d like it more to be like a dinner table conversation about a certain topic. Like, I was just talking to my family and just, like, you know, shooting the shit with them. But about, you know what? What is bitcoin? What is trans? What my parents — what — or what is transgender? And what is it, you know, what is gender nonconforming like? What are all those things like? I love just, like, actually just talking to people about it and having — not holding back my opinion and my thoughts and my questions. Just in case I feel like just — I just don’t want to not — I don’t want to be scared of feeling down, like, I know, I found out sometimes that everyone sounds bad, and I think that a lot of people are just scared to sound stupid. But a lot of people are because no one knows everything, you know?

[00:39:28] CHRIS: Okay. Because you mentioned, getting curious, Jonathan, from Queer Eye, does this all seem like — Harry’s telling me I should also mention unofficial expert here, which does a Sydney Washington? Right? Sydney Washington, who’s a comedian around New York? I’ve come to really enjoy greatly, by the way. Sydney, someone — you know me. I know how to pick them. You’re going to be seeing Sydney around a lot. Sydney’s gonna make it. I have not talked to Sydney about this. I only met Sydney two or three times. That’s another — Okay. Okay. Let me ask you this. Let me ask you this. How how much of it — How much are you aimed — just so I know the tone, how much of this is aimed at being like a straightforward, empathetic conversation? Does it have an effort to be a funny podcast? Where are you trying to land tonally, just so I can make sure that the powers that be at Earwolf know exactly what we’re getting into. I’m starting to have some real questions and ideas about this.

[00:40:23] CALLER: Okay, cool. Cool. Okay. So I feel like a little bit of both. Like, I think I’ll always — humor is kind of a coping mechanism of mine. I think — I think everyone fricking says that. But it is, like, all my life, like, I said, tell your million stories very similar or a coping mechanism, but we’re not gonna get into that. But I think — but, like, so that we’ll always have, like, a joking aspect to it. But, like, I’ve had guests on that — I had a guest on about being a cancer survivor and what that was like, and that we still joked around. But it was also, like, a very empathetic conversation where people could understand how to treat someone that, you know, even is just sick with a cold. You know, she really went through, like, the different ways of, like, how to treat a friend when they’re going through something. So they just, like, stuff like that or, like — and I have, you know, an upcoming next season. I have, like, talk about — I talked to a girl who has schizophrenia. And, like, we really just like to talk about what her life is like, but we still get to joke around. So it’s like, you know, I want — I don’t want people to be so uptight about conversations. Also, there’s a lot of taboo things that we don’t talk about when I want to be able to talk about things that are, quote unquote, taboo. You know, even in an easy way, because there are no rules. We’re just — it’s just life. You know, there are rules. Don’t be like a dick, obviously, but, like, you know?

[00:41:51] CHRIS: Okay, okay. And let me ask this. How old are you? How old are you?

[00:41:57] CALLER: 24.

[00:41:59] CHRIS: You’re 24! Okay. First of all, you could still be on your parent’s health insurance. Health insurance is tight, but you’ve got two years left. So if you need that time right now, health insurance is not — health insurance is a huge thing that people do need. And it makes me happy to hear that you’re being responsible about it. But if you’re going, health insurance is tight. That’s why I can’t take a chance on myself. You got two years. Tell your grumpy dad you got to take a chance and bet on yourself, man.

[00:42:26] CALLER: I know, I know. I just don’t want to burden them with some extra. I know. I think it costs a little more. Yeah.

[00:42:33] CHRIS: We’ll pay them and go up. How do you go? Here’s what you do. You go. How about this? “You think I can earn out as an illustrator and a podcaster? Let me get enough commissions. What? How much does it increase your premiums? I’ll pay it.” How’s that sound?

[00:42:49] CALLER: Hey, that’s a good idea.

[00:42:50] CHRIS: “How does that sound, dad? Let me prove myself to you.” I come — my dad — my mom was really rooting for me, I think, pretty quietly. My parents were so confused when I wanted to be an artist. So confused. And when I was maybe 22, 23 and my dad sat me down and goes, “You sure you want to do this? And sure you want to do this. Seems hard. Seems uncertain.” Yeah. And I said, “Yeah.” I mean, I said, “I do. Yeah.” And knew I had to work as hard as he did at his stuff and then he’d respect me. Yeah.

[00:43:15] CALLER: And my dad’s supportive. He just like he’s, you know, an old-school Puerto Rican father. You know, he — he wants me to be secure.

[00:43:25] CHRIS: Yeah. And so he’s right.

[00:43:29] CALLER: So I totally get it. Anyway, what were you going to say?

[00:43:30] CHRIS: You gotta prove that you can do better thing. Okay. Here’s what I would do if I was you. And I don’t know if I have. I don’t know if you do something like this already because you’ve said a lot of stuff that really woke me up. I would — you know what I would say? I’d — I’d make some little, you know how Marc Maron’s got the “locked the gates.” He’s got like the audio job that explains what it is we got. We got the One hour. One phone call. No names. No holds barred. If I were you, I’d make some version of it. Like what you did. If you’re like, “I’m — I’m 24. I’m a millennial. Got a lot of opinions. But everybody assumes that our opinions are founded on nothing. I know I sound dumb sometimes, so I’m bringing in the experts to make me not dumb. So when I go to fight people at the dinner table, I know what I’m talking about. Welcome to my show.”

[00:44:13] CALLER: Hell ya, hell ya. That’s a. I’m gonna. I wanted to redo it anyway. See, mine was know people probably told you know who I am I guess now, but not as if I’m famous but I’m just saying like so mine is [BEEP] shit. Can you bleep that out?

[00:44:28] CHRIS: That’s okay! We’ll decide — we’ll either bleep it out or we won’t.

[00:44:33] CALLER: I know, I know, you know.

[00:44:34] CHRIS: What was your podcast. What’s it called now. What’s it called now?

[00:44:37] CALLER: [BEEP] 

[00:44:38] CHRIS: Well, there’s already a very, very popular entrenched podcast called [BEEP]. I’m a little worried by now. I’m a little worried about that.

[00:44:46] CALLER: Hey, if I link up with Earwolf, I would, I would totally change the name.

[00:44:50] CHRIS: Think you got to call it. But I think you’ve got to call it The Enlightened Millennial or Enlighten Them or Teach Me, Goddamn It or —

[00:45:02] CALLER: I have a theme song and everything.

[00:45:03] CHRIS: You do? Who — you made. Who made the theme song?

[00:45:06] CALLER: My sound guy. He’s a — he’s a jingle master.

[00:45:09] CHRIS: He’s a jingle master.

[00:45:14] CALLER: Literally what he got like what — you know, probably what it says on his LinkedIn. Then he made a jingle for like NBC and stuff .

[00:45:22] CHRIS: Probably, or does it on a person’s Linked-In say the phrase jingle — I need to know if this is probably or this is just a little exaggeration on your part.

[00:45:39] CALLER: I don’t know. I don’t look through his LinkedIn. But, you know, that’s how he describes his job to me is sound engineer, also, jingle master.

[00:45:46] CHRIS: Jingle master. Great, great. That’s a hook that gets a listen. Okay. Now. Yeah. Okay. Here’s a question. Here’s a question they’re gonna ask you in an Earwolf pitch: What steps are you taking to build the audience? What steps are you taking to build out now? Right now, what markets can you corner right now?

[00:46:06] [AD BREAK] 

[00:48:05] CALLER: So I’m doing a lot of, you know, a lot of marketing on social media now, all because I — that’s where most of my audience plus the millennial audience is, especially specifically Instagram. I’m getting promotions on that. But I need to like do more word of mouth. Like, I definitely want to go to podcast conventions whenever they are. You know, how to know — I would love to do some advertising somewhere, but it’s just — I want to print out some stickers, stick them around the city. Who knows? But I don’t know.

[00:48:39] CHRIS: You need to come up with an answer to that question. That’s less self-conscious. That’s a note for you right there. No. Sighing and giggling.

[00:48:48] CALLER: I know, that’s another — that’s another scoop. Exactly.

[00:48:51] CHRIS: I know it is. But I do it too. I do it too. Why? Why be our own Achilles’ heel? Why? There’s so many things that are going to stop us. It shouldn’t be our own self-consciousness. But then again, you’re talking to a person who is defined by his self-consciousness, 50/50 split between complete, complete lack of self esteem and total narcissism. That’s how I describe myself. Okay. Okay.

[00:49:18] CALLER: Same. Honestly, same.

[00:49:21] CHRIS: Let’s. Okay.

[00:49:22] CALLER: But —

[00:49:23] CHRIS: If you — let’s say you’re brainstorming episodes, and I’m not trying to be arrogant here, I’m doing this for the purpose of our exercise together today. You’re trying to — you’re trying to brainstorm episodes. If you were to consider me an expert — if you’re sitting around going, “Oh, we should get Gethard to be the expert on that.” What would be the topics?

[00:49:43] CALLER: There’s so many topics I feel like you know a lot about, like dealing with, one, being comedian; two, being a podcaster; and, like, three, like, dealing with, like, mental illness and, like, or like, using, like, your mental illness in your comedy acts and, like, how that, you know — and I don’t know how exactly I would phrase that. I feel like I’m having — I’m interviewing a friend of mine with Asperger’s this upcoming weekend, and he’s a comedian, too, and he talks about his Asperger’s and his comedy. So we’re talking about Asperger’s, and we’re going to talk about the aspect. So, like, stuff like that.

[00:50:21] CHRIS: So what — Okay, let’s see. Because usually I avoid the mental health stuff cause it will lead to a barrage of Instagram DM’s from people who are very sad, and that will make me feel like, you know, I can’t help that I’ve tried to help the world as much as I can and getting a little maxed out. Okay. Let’s have a comedian — podcaster — but that’s kind of what this whole thing has been.

[00:50:45] CALLER: I mean, I love — but I do want to have an episode on comedians.

[00:50:48] CHRIS: Okay. So ask me a couple comedian questions. What would be — what would be the question you’d come out of the gate with? If you were asking me about —

[00:50:55] CALLER: Okay. So usually I start with how, how did — one, how did you, Geth, how did you decide you wanted to be a comedian? Two, what was the journey to being a successful comedian? So like that usually because I don’t want to have —

[00:51:12] CHRIS: But is this how you deliver — is how you deliver it on the podcast?

[00:51:16] CALLER: No.

[00:51:17] CHRIS: Let’s drop it. Drop it like it’s hot.

[00:51:21] CALLER: Well, it’s kind of — it’s like this. I’m kinda just, like, “So, you know, what — At what age did you actually think like, ‘Well, you know, I want to do this. I want to be a comedian.’” You know? And then we just, like, talk about their life, you know, just as you would anyone, but in, you know, recorded, but actually has a lot more substance to it. Yeah. It’s like actually something, you know, I don’t know. That’s a bad — Go big.

[00:51:57] CHRIS: Okay. Here’s the — here’s the advice. Here’s the advice. I think this is on target. I’m going to be clear, something that I’m thinking in my gut but that Harry typed out to me on our little document before that Jared actually highlighted. He thought, that’s good too. Here’s the thing. So this podcast is a dedication toward your personal development, right?

[00:52:22] CALLER: Yes.

[00:52:23] CHRIS: The end of the day, it’s about, “I want to become better developed as a person. I want to do that publicly so that maybe other people can help or enjoy and share in that experience as well.”

[00:52:33] CALLER: Yes.

[00:52:36] CHRIS: Maybe. Start there, and let it be that. And worry less about — worry less about writing to companies and going to conventions right now, and just crush that for real. And let it be about your personal. And then. So true to that, so honest and so pure to that, with no other concerns that people can’t resist sensing how genuine it is and how honest it is.

[00:53:08] CALLER: You know, I mean, I try to do that. I’ve had a full first season because that’s all I can afford, but — for the sound guy — but I’m having, you know, it’s not like I have, like, this huge audience. You know, I have about in total two thousand listeners that I hold, a weekly —

[00:53:32] CHRIS: That ain’t bad!

[00:53:33] But total weekly is probably around 200, which is still good for me. I’m surprised anyone listens. You know?

[00:53:43] CHRIS: So you’re saying, you, you have a pool of about 2000 people, you know, check it out sometimes and about, yeah, 10 percent of that is actively buying into every episode. That type of thing?

[00:53:54] CALLER: Yes. Yes. That’s what — overall I’ve had 2,000 listeners. Every week, week that I post there are 200 of those 2,000 that listen if that makes sense.

[00:54:06] CHRIS: So got a pretty good so — pretty good start.

[00:54:09] CALLER: Yes. Not bad. But you know, I’m not just, you know, making shit. You know, I don’t — like, I listen to a lot of podcasts that I I know of that people who are also just starting out. And a lot of it’s not very, like, well produced, which is fine. I truly understand that people just, like, make podcasts to make podcasts. But, like, I’m really trying to, like, make it well-produced and get proper equipment and get the right editing and get a theme song and get, like, you know. And so I — I want to act. It should be quality content. I always want to have quality content. But I’m also — it’s also very much so about — to make it quality. It has to be quality conversation. And so I’m definitely trying to have an actually enriching conversation with these people. So I definitely, definitely, but I’ve learned so much. And I say that in a lot of the things I write about it, like, even if no one listens, I’ve learned so much talking to these people. And I like want — I want to always continue to do that. But I think that’s, like, a part of my calling is to talk and learn from people and, like, have these human connections. So even if I end up changing the podcast or having a different podcast on one day, I would love to just have human connection to learn because I think, you know, you’re not learning you’re dead, right?

[00:55:33] CHRIS: Yeah. Okay, so here’s my — here’s my — let’s sum it up. I’m going to sum it up with a couple pieces of advice. One, like I said, I would do an audio drop that lays that out. “I want to be smarter. People underestimate people my age. Fill me in, then. I know I sound dumb sometimes. I’m going to make an effort to learn, push against the series.” Whatever their version is for you, too. I would make sure you say that to every one of your guests. I would make sure that. “Thank you. Thank you for being here. I’m the type of person that feels like if I’m not learning, then I’m drowning. So thank you, because this is the type of thing that keeps me going. Fill me in. You have some things to say.”

[00:56:10] CALLER: Yeah, I do.

[00:56:11] CHRIS: Good, good, good! And the third one I would say. The third one I would say go all in. I’m making about you — about the work. Don’t worry right now about the companies. I know that you want to get out of your other job, but build it and enjoy building it. And I would say there’s a companion, there’s a 3-B: No self-consciousness when you’re talking about it. No self-consciousness on it. It’s your shit. It’s cool. Own it. If I said — if I — if I sat around apologizing for my work when I was on a public access TV show that was horrible. I would have quit. I was sick. That’s one way to put it. I was sick, sick in the head and just, like, I was back in 2011, 2009. I was sick. All right. But you know what I mean? I said, “No, I’m proud of the thing. I’m proud of it. And I think there’s something special here and I’ll make jokes about it.” But everybody watching that thing knew. “No, I’m proud of it. And I’m not going to apologize for that.”

[00:57:19] CALLER: Yeah.

[00:57:20] CHRIS: Now, I’ve given you a lot of advice. Can I get some advice from you?

[00:57:24] CALLER: What do you want advice on? From — for Beautiful Anonymous?

[00:57:28] CHRIS: To me. Yes. Beautiful Anonymous and me, personally.

[00:57:34] CALLER: Well, I think —

[00:57:36] CHRIS: I got two — well, I have to say I have some specific questions is what I was getting at. Although what were you — no, I’m really fascinated. What are you going to say? What’s the advice that —

[00:57:45] CALLER: Yeah. I was going to say you should move with Hudson Valley and raise your beautiful baby that you’re going to have — Congratulations — in the Hudson Valley because Hudson Valley kids are great. No offense to Jersey.

[00:57:56] CHRIS: Yeah, I mean, Jersey kids though. Jersey kids. Hudson Valley people are great. And they’re like artsy and they’re sensitive souls. And I think hearing you say, like, “I’m just really dedicated to being a more well-rounded person who wants to know more things and speak honestly.” That strikes me very much as the Hudson Valley curiosity that I’ve come to know and love about the people there. But Jersey people. I dare you to fuck with this man. We’ll pop you, we’ll pop you in the eye, and then we’ll help you up and buy you a drink because we’re a good soul getting involved.

[00:58:26] CALLER: You know where everyone from Westchester Putnam County is from? The Bronx, baby. There’s a couple of my dad’s from Spanish Harlem.

[00:58:38] CHRIS: You know, there’s a — There’s the tough, you know, Yonkers tells me — Yonkers that you get in doesn’t let up. And people don’t realize that Yonkers is a very for-real place. Okay.

[00:58:48] CALLER: Oh, I know.

[00:58:49] CHRIS: Now, let me ask you — let me ask you my two pieces of advice. One. As a social media marketer, what do I gotta do to be better on the social media? I feel like my social media output used to be — Oh, people used to write about my use of Twitter. There is a Gary Vaynerchuk, Gary V, who’s like this guru in a book shouted me out for how I use Twitter to connect with my fans. I feel like I have lost my pace with social media. I feel like I never caught on with Snapchat. I barely understand Instagram. Clearly, technologically, I’ve been left behind. As someone who is clearly someone who follows my work, what am I doing wrong on social media that I feel like I’ve lost my way with it a little bit?

[00:59:26] CALLER: OK. Well, I think you’re lucky in that you have a following. See, everyone on social media is trying to get a following, and you have this following already. So you’re able to be super real with, with everyone. I just feel when I follow you on Instagram, I feel like I’m just following a friend because you give us updates on your martial arts. What is that? What do you do specifically?

[00:59:49] CHRIS: It’s Brazilian jiu-jitsu. See, I was very confused about why those posts blew up, and you’re telling me it’s because it’s me letting my guard down. I feel like I’m unable to let my guard down, and I’m unable to whip my fan base into activity or excitement like I used to be.

[01:00:07] CALLER: Really? I feel like — I don’t know. I feel like a lot of your fan base now, maybe, maybe it was because your fan base before was from the Chris Gethard show and now it’s more geared towards Beautiful Anonymous. So maybe I feel like that’s a little, I — you said it before. Like, a little bit of a different audience. So, like, maybe people from Beautiful Anonymous like these posts where you’re posting about your wife and you on vacation and you’re, you know, average is everything you’re doing. I say I think that people like to see your life. People like to see, quote unquote, celebrities. I don’t know if you like being called a celebrity, but you have a celebrity —

[01:00:49] CHRIS: I do not.

[01:00:50] CALLER: — And, you know, and so I think that people like seeing what people are doing outside of their jobs in general. So. Okay. And I think you and your Twitter is good, too. It’s — I get all the notifications I see.

[01:01:04] CHRIS: But I feel like I could do better. If you were me as a pro, if I came to you and said I want to hire you as a social marketing professional, how would you merge my multiple fanbase? Beautiful Anonymous together, show the Career Suicide people. How do you make the fans of The Office who only know me through that which has become — I’ve realized that show replays so much that it’s — I get recognized. How would you put it all together? Cause I have al — I feel like if I could put it all together, I’d be, I’d be one of the more popular comedians out there. And I feel like I’m third tier at best.

[01:01:39] CALLER: Yeah, I hear you. I mean —

[01:01:41] CHRIS: Thank you for agreeing.

[01:01:43] CALLER: So I don’t say you’re here to say you’re third tier at best. But, you know, I’d say you’re great. You know, you’re the only comedian I’ve paid money to really go see specifically.

[01:01:56] CHRIS: So, yeah, but I’m also the only one that came to Woodstock, which is eight minutes from your house.

[01:02:02] CALLER: No, it’s not. I don’t. I live far from Woodstock. But, but Loomis. I live in the city now. So first the trek. The trek. And I went all way with success for you. But regardless of what we do. And most people who do social media marketing, from what I can tell, is that we do — we schedule out. This is crazy. We schedule out our month, basically. But you don’t have to do this because this is your personal account. We schedule out our month, and we post what generally what we want to post. And then every week we do specifics on what we’re going to post that week. So like it could be, say, you’re posting about your Brazilian jiu-jitsu, you say?

[01:02:47] CHRIS: Yes. Yes. Thank you so much.

[01:02:49] CALLER: Okay. Brazilian jiu-jitsu. And then you’re posting about where you’re going to be a comedy show. You should post pictures of you on stage, at con. And what do you do? I think. But. And then doing a comedy act or like do some reposts of people that have seen you like I’ve posted. I can — I can email you some pictures I’ve taken at, you know, the — what’s that picture? The Woodstock show? And I went to Beautiful Anonymous live at the Bell House. But — and the — is that weird to say — is really weird for you, for me to be like, “I’ve seen you multiple times?”

[01:03:25] CHRIS: No, no. It’s flattering. It’s very flattering. And I appreciate it. And I thank you know, it’s not weird.

[01:03:34] CALLER: And you’re welcome. Yeah, my pleasure. So, like, I would just, you know, know what you’re, you’re posting and then, you know. You do — you do — I think you post a fair amount. But I’m people generally post about two times a day

[01:03:47] CHRIS: It’s mostly just close-ups of my forehead with ear — headphones on, though. Most of my Instagram is just pictures taken from two close angles with headphones on as I plug that this show starting.

[01:04:00] CALLER: Yeah, well, that’s like — we use — I don’t know how much you do that, but you can’t really control that because you need to do that. You can also start doing it on Instagram stories. You know, oh my gosh, it’s so boring for people.

[01:04:12] CHRIS: Yes.

[01:04:13] CALLER: They turn it off.

[01:04:15] CHRIS: There’s a handful of people that are flipping out and loving it. And certainly with five minutes left, some people have walked away from this episode for sure. But that’s every episode. Every episode.

[01:04:26] CALLER: That’s every episode.

[01:04:27]  CHRIS: Okay. Let me ask you.

[01:04:28] CALLER: I just can’t believe I’m on.

[01:04:29] CHRIS: You’re killing it. You’re doing great. Let me ask you another question. Let me ask another advice. More advice. And less focus on social media, more focused on you as someone who has supported my work. Okay. And this is real. This is me coming from the heart. Everybody listening. You’re about to hear me get a little raw. Something I’ve been thinking really hard about.

[01:04:49] CALLER: I love it.

[01:04:51] CHRIS: So I would say four or five years ago, I was cool to young people in a way that I am not anymore — almost to the point where I felt like I had this vibe almost as like a countercultural figure, sort of like a DIY punk rock locked in. And I have — I feel like I’ve lost that and I’m pushing 40. And maybe the answer is just, “Hey, man, you’re pushing 40. You’re gonna be a dad, you’re growing up, you’re an adult. You’re much more of an adult. You got your head together.” Maybe I’m answering all this myself. But for you, here’s my question, this is something I’m very insecure about: Why did young people — why did the young people stop thinking I was cool?

[01:05:37] CALLER: Where are you getting this, though? That’s my — yes, my confusion with who — I probably discovered you from Career Suicide and I — on, like, HBO. And I was like, I think, like, 22 when I first and and, you know, it’s not like you were that much younger when I was 22. Who’s saying that you’re not cool? Is it just in your head?

[01:06:04] CHRIS: Maybe. As many things are.

[01:06:06] CALLER: I think it’s just in your head because I think like add — as.

[01:06:09] CHRIS: I was cool in a different way, I was like the comedian that if you knew about me, it meant you knew about the underground shit. I was that. I was that.

[01:06:19] CALLER: No, I hear you. Well, that’s funny that you say that. I was talking to my buddy the other day, and he’s from a similar area. New Jersey for you, apparently. And he’s all about that, like, the punk rock scene over there. And he was like. And I was like, “Oh, he would love Chris Gethard then.” And then he was like, “Oh, I know Chris Gethard.” Yeah. He would like go to the — he would go to our shows, and he’d be the one doing the comedy acts like in between the show. And no one really knew who he was, but he was the guy that did comedy.

[01:06:46] CHRIS: Yeah.

[01:06:47] CALLER: So.

[01:06:48] CHRIS: And is that — maybe this is just me looking back with rose-colored glasses and going, “Wow, I’ve done some stuff that was successful now, and you can’t have it both ways.”

[01:06:57] CALLER: Yeah. You know, I think — but I think with you. And I just try to compliment — give you a compliment. But I — this is how I feel, like — I think you’re very successful and — but I think people still see you as kind of like underground, like, more niche guy, you know? Is niche an annoying word? Probably.

[01:07:17] CHRIS: But it’s a terrifying — it’s actually a terrible word. What it means — it means that — that’s the scary — I think that’s why I’m so scared lately, is that, like, you — well, I’ve now gotten too successful to still genuinely be underground cool. But I’m not successful enough. So I’m still niche. And that sounds to me like someone whose career would fall apart in five minutes. That’s what the — also does this mark a low point in the show? I went to Facebook of the — does me begging a 24 year old to explain to me if I’m cool or not mark an official low point in the history of Beautiful Anonymous? A desperate 38-year-old man begging a 24-year-old, “Why aren’t I cool? I used to be cool. Am I cool?”

[01:08:03] CALLER: You’re so cool!

[01:08:05] CHRIS: No, I’m not cool anymore. That was never — I’m not that. They walked away.

[01:08:16] CALLER: Chris, listen, I think what is good is growth. Right? That’s what my podcast too, you know, growing. And I think you have to just grow with the audience. I think a lot of your demographic now — you think about the people who — how old the people were when you were doing those shows — that this punk rock shows and like, you know, whoever’s basement it was, it was people your age now — people your age are also having kids and also have careers that also are, like — they probably feel like they’re not as cool. And so —

[01:08:48] CHRIS: Well.

[01:08:50] CALLER: And they also finally feel like they’re not as cool quote — I’m doing air quotes, you know. And so I feel like if your audience has just grown with you, so maybe you just don’t feel like you have. You know, you’re not as cool as you were when you’re, like, in your 20s, but not, like — no one, you know?

[01:09:09] CHRIS: No one is. No one is. You’re not as cool when you’re 38 as you were when you’re 29. That’s the answer. You want to —

[01:09:16] CALLER: Exactly! And it’s like nothing, like, I’m super cool.

[01:09:17] CHRIS: I think you’re pretty cool. You want to hear — you want to know what I think the secret to Beautiful Anonymous is, because I think it’s when we did the demographic survey, I think it was, like, what was it? It was like 70 percent of our listeners are female, right? And most of them are above the age of 30, which was for me, a whole new audience. But, you know, what I think I’ve realized, as we do the show more or more years, is that I think there’s a lot of people who fit that demographic who in maybe 2016, 2017, 2018, they’re like figuring out, “I think maybe this show is like me. This guy grew up a punk rocker connecting with people of that demographic.” Because maybe right now women in their 30s are like, “You know what, fuck, you were punk rock, too. And we kind of always have been.” I think that might be the secret to this show. I think that might be it.

[01:10:06] CALLER: Yeah, I think it is. And you have to grow with your audience because we’re all rooting for you, you know?

[01:10:11] CHRIS: 19 years into a comedy career, “We’re all rooting for you!” Well, guess what? I’m rooting for you, too. I hope it works out. I hope you illustrate — hope you podcast. Hope you get out of the social media thing that’s driving you a little batty, and I am rooting for you, too. I promise you.

[01:10:30] CALLER: Thank you. Do we have like 30 seconds left? Is that why —

[01:10:33] CHRIS: No. We’ve already gone over time.

[01:10:37] CALLER: Oh, really? 

[01:10:38] CHRIS: Good luck. 

[01:10:39] CALLER: Oh, no. My boss is probably like, “Where are you?”

[01:10:48] CHRIS: Caller, Thank you so much. And I hope everything goes well. You sound like a very smart person, driven person, and I wish you nothing but the best. Thank you for calling. Thanks, everybody, for listening. Thank you, Jared O’Connell and Harry Nelson in the booth. Thank you, Justin Lindell for helping me so much with my life. Thank you, Shellshag for the intro song. If you want to know about me, when I’ve got my shows coming up. ChrisGeth.com. You can go find tickets there. If you like Beautiful Anonymous, one way you can help, you go to Apple podcasts, then rate, review, subscribe. It really helps out when you do. That’s all the business. We’ll see you next time. Next time on Beautiful Anonymous, a guy who’s figured out how to live his best life encourages the rest of us to do the same.

[NEXT EPISODE PREVIEW]

[01:11:45] CHRIS: I wouldn’t mind spending an hour just hearing your thought process on what you should eat for lunch. I think that’s pretty fascinating audio.

[01:11:52] CALLER: You know what — I’ve got to admit, Chris, you know, I listened to your show for a while and I know a lot of calls are, you know, in depth and real intense conversations and some are lighthearted and fun. And I’m a cat that’s really the hardest part of my day is trying to figure out where I’m going to eat for lunch. I’m blessed.

[01:12:12] CHRIS: How’d you wind up with such a lucky life?

[01:12:15] CALLER: It doesn’t have to be hard. Just try to surround yourself with good people. And luckily, at 28, I’ve found the career path that I wanted to go down, and after that — and everything just kind of falls into place after that.

[01:12:29]  CHRIS: That’s next time on Beautiful Anonymous.