EP. 164 — The Cuckoo’s Nest

[00:01:02] CHRIS:Hello to everybody eatin’ in their 1950s living room. It’s Beautiful Anonymous. One hour, one phone call, no names, no holds barred.

[00:01:14] THEME MUSIC: I’d rather go one-on-one. I think it’ll be more fun and I’ll get to know you and you’ll get to know me.

[00:01:25] CHRIS: Hi, everybody. Chris Gethard, welcome to another episode of Beautiful Anonymous. Try to get through this intro without my voice giving out too hard, see how it goes. I want to thank everybody for listening. I want to thank everybody for supporting the show. I will say last week’s episode caller talked about what it was like to raise a child with Down syndrome and it was very impactful and meaningful and I got very emotional and many of you did too. But I got to say, in those Facebook comments, it was very, very eye opening and cool for me to see how many people said they got something out of it. Both learning an outside perspective and also a lot of people who said ‘I’m in the same boat, my child, my sibling, people in our lives who are special needs.’ It was just cool to see that it meant something to you guys. Thank you for listening and supporting. Speaking of the Facebook group, I want to thank Sydney, who drew an image of me riding a bear while dressed as a ranger in tribute to Glandin Oak Foot, my DND character from the DND episode a couple weeks back. Thank you for that. It’s ridiculous. If you’re in New York City, I’m gonna put something out here, this may be a bad idea. But everybody knows I love to do bad ideas. We have a new advertiser on the show. This is not part of the advertising, but they’re actually advertising next week, AirBnB is doing this thing where they’re not just selling lodging anymore. They’re selling these guided adventures. And they’re going to be advertising that on the show next week. I thought it was really in the spirit of the show in the sense that you can go and hang out with strangers. So I’m actually doing one of these things tomorrow night. This is being released on Tuesday, May 21st. Wednesday, May 22nd they have a a Jackson Heights food tour. Everybody knows I live in Jackson Heights and I’m always talking about the food. If you want to sign up, y’all, you can go see it. I’m Wednesday, May 22nd. The name of the tour is Eat Street Food After Dark in NYC. It’s in Jackson Heights, Queens, from 7:30-10:30. You’ll see it, if you’re the first one to get there. you’ll see three of 10 spots are taken. Maybe you want to buy one of those other seven spots. Listeners of the show come hang out, eat food with me in Queens, walk around. It’ll be fun. Now this week’s episode. I am very happy about it. I remember this taping quite well. I found it quite fun. The caller, as many of our callers is, you know, figuring out life, figuring out where things are going to go. Many questions. And it was interesting talk. I will say I am going to put it out there and say that I find out early that this caller works in the world of theme restaurants. And I flip out and I steamroll the call more than I usually do. I will say, because I got very excited, because I find theme restaurants to be fascinating and hilarious. And there are major stretches of this where I just get really manic and start shouting about my favorite theme restaurants throughout the country. And I want to apologize to the caller because I don’t know that you wanted to spend all that time hearing my opinions on different ridiculous restaurants, but I’m glad you put up with me. And I will ask if you’re out there and you’re a fan, either tweet at me or leave a message on Instagram or preferably join the Facebook group Beautiful Anonymous the community. Let me know about your favorite theme restaurants in your cities, in your towns, because I travel all the time doing standup and I want to eat at crazy, ridiculous themed restaurants. So let me know your favorites and enjoy this call. It’s a fun one.

[00:04:47] PHONE ROBOT: Thank you for calling Beautiful Anonymous a beeping noise will indicate when you are on the show with the host.

[00:04:56] CALLER: Hello?

[00:04:57] CHRIS: Hello?

[00:05:00] CALLER: Hi, Chris?

[00:04:54] CHRIS: Yeah

[00:05:04] CALLER: Hey, what’s going on?

[00:05:05] CHRIS: What’s going on? I mean, the answer is too long for a- I always try to be honest, but my whole life is insane right now is what’s going on. But for beautiful reasons. So that’s what’s going on. How are you? What’s going on with you?

[00:05:22] CALLER: Oh, man, like it’s feeling good. It’s funny. You probably know this feeling of like you feel like there’s lot lot going on, But you’ve gotten used to it though, yet you’re like to ‘me it doesn’t feel like too much’. I guess maybe sometimes when I’ve done described it to other people, they’re like, ‘oh, that’s a lot of like,’ oh, I guess so. I don’t know.

[00:05:43] CHRIS: Yeah, I’ve been there. Are you a workaholic like me? You pile on too much and then don’t realize it and then it all collapses at once?

[00:05:50] CALLER: Yeah. Or I start to feel it and then. Yeah, that’s kinda… I’ve physically run myself into the ground especially like earlier this year. Like I have now gotten to the point where I physically broken myself a little bit.

[00:06:04] CHRIS: Oh no 

[00:06:05] CALLER: From working too much. 

[00:06:07] CHRIS: That’s not good. What type of work do you do?

[00:06:12] CALLER: I do painting and prop making like, you know, like a like I’m a maker, essentially, kind of. So like I’ve done some carpentry work, but my main focus is doing, like especially right now, it’s mainly, you know, like scenic painting. You know, like in TV and film. And then I do prop making when I can, of just kind of like grabbing random pieces and assembling different things for different projects. So, yeah. And gosh it’s been like since I graduated college, I had like three months at home with my parents figuring stuff out. And then I got my first job and then I’ve just been like working ever since. And it’s been like, I think eight years now of just like, you know, jumping from job to job and moving all over the country for it.

[00:07:07] CHRIS: And I know there’s a few different ways that what you’re describing can manifest itself. I know that on my end, I can speak to it in the sense of TV sets have to get built. And I don’t mean TV sets like the box that sits in your house. I mean, like a set of a television show. And I know with myself, it’s it’s a harder job than you might realize, because what happens is the whole production gets up and running. People know what they want. They think about the set. But when they call you, they’re like, okay, here’s what we want. You have three and a half days to effectively build a building inside a studio. Go find all the materials and then build it. And then you kind of work around the clock until it’s built, right? That’s that’s what happened with my show.

[00:07:54] CALLER: Yeah. And I mean, like to get a little more specific but not too specific. Most of, I’ve done a little bit of TV and film, but most of my work has been like for private clients or what they call kind of themed attractions or themed like a restaurant and that kind of thing. So I guess like the best way to describe it, I literally had a job where I got a call from a guy I didn’t know. And he’s like, “I need some people, I already have a team that’s building stuff, but I need more people. I hear, hear you’re good at that. Can you come to this address later in the day?” And I’m like, “sure”. And I show up and it’s just like, you know, a bare bones, small warehouse where like, you know, it’s a production office where they kind of just set up desks and start working and don’t worry too much about decorating. And it was very dimly lit. And then there was a bunch of stuff in the back, like piles and piles of stuff from like, you know, junkyards and stuff. And it was, “oh, we have this themed restaurant where we’re working on and I need this, this, this, this, this, this. And here’s a pile of garbage I’ve collected from the the junk yards in town. Can you build these things?” Like no technical drawings. Like a few conversations, a little bit of an outline. And I was like, “oh! okay!” And yeah, it’s a lot of time. It’s not as official people might think.

[00:09:24] CHRIS: Wow. And when it’s a restaurant I would imagine it all needs to be up to health codes too. You got to have them egresses. You need a good egress.

[00:09:35] CALLER: Yeah. Well yeah. I don’t know as much about the codes because it usually ends up for the product managers and installers at that point. But I know it was mostly stuff that was like up and away and more on the wall. And so yeah, especially like construction building and some of the construction code and stuff and installing it too, because then they like flew me out with them for the project and I was ending up managing like, helping to manage a union crew out in the city we were in. And all the walls are like concrete and you got a drill like way deep in there to get stuff in there and then use like the special epoxy cement to install it and all stuff I’d like never done before. But it was just like learning on the fly, having to take Ubers to all the local Home Depots to get more supplies for like the union crew. I’m like what? And actually that was like during the the first women’s march. So like the city, it was like, you know, the inauguration and stuff. So a super surreal time, the cities clogged with protesters. And I’m like trying to do this gig as well as I can. And I’m in a city that I don’t know. And I’m like, what’s going on? It’s crazy. But then those are like the best stories later, like, look back on that time really fondly.

[00:10:55] CHRIS: Now you are being very professional. You are. But I can tell there’s more to what you’re saying. I’m going to connect some dots. I’m going to put some words in your mouth. And you can correct me if I’m wrong. What you just described to me. If I’m connecting the dots, right. Sounds like some rich lunatic, as you said, found a big pile of garbage and decided like ‘this is going to be my chance to build my version of the Hard Rock Cafe’, like that type of thing. ‘This will be my planet Hollywood’. And it’s a big pile of trash on the ground. ‘They will eat loaded nachos in this place where I’m nailing a bunch of masks to the wall’. Is it close to that?

[00:11:34] CALLER: Oh, I wish. Oh, man. I so wish you knew the guy who was the one who hired me. So you’re off like a little bit. But it’s a pretty close like impression of how he talks.

[00:11:48] CHRIS: Ooh, I like that. 

[00:11:49] CALLER: Yeah, no it’s like a fun energy to be around, but sometimes I think I called my boyfriend and was doing the like, ‘hey, how do you know someone’s on cocaine?’

[00:12:00] CHRIS: Right. Right. 

[00:12:02] CALLER: Just for the energy, just like the immense amount of energy. I was like wow.

[00:12:08] CHRIS: I hope that gig was in Vegas. I hope it was in Vegas. And it was some guys like ‘Ahh, there’s not enough themed stuff around here. I know there’s an entire casino that’s built like ancient Rome and another one that’s built like Venice and another one that’s built like Paris. But we need a thing where I put boxing gloves everywhere.’ I hope it was that type of thing. 

[00:12:28] CALLER: I actually kinda want to see that, that sounds cool.

[00:12:29] CHRIS: I’d eat at a boxing themed restaurant. I absolutely would if it was all match-worn, bloodied up gloves. And you can sit there and eat a lovely creme brûlée under the gloves that Arturo Gatti used to pound Mickey Ward’s face into chopped meat. Yeah, I would do that. I’d eat at that restaurant.

[00:12:45] CALLER: I mean, I don’t know about you. When I think boxing, I think creme brûlée. It’s a very silent dessert, just cracking the shell.

[00:12:49] CHRIS: Hahahaha, Yeah. Touche, you crushed me on that. I like your dry sense of humor. You called out my inappropriate dessert choice. Now, I’m going to go aead` and tell you something about me. I love a good themed restaurant. I love it. Do you have to go to a lot of themed restaurants as part of your work? Because I want to just go through a list of some of the ones that I like.

[00:13:17] CALLER: I have been to a good number of them. Luckily, where I live, it’s definitely there’s a lot of good food here. And so I don’t end up going to like, I guess, the more tourist ones that people would consider. And, you know, I’ll be that kind of hipster neighborhood that’s like good local places. Not a total like, foodie nut, but just like, oh, ‘there’s this nice place in town’. And, you know, especially in a nice like, you know, secondary market, artistic community where like you see the same muralists that do work around multiple buildings and the same like restaurant peers are opening different places, but they’re doing a different take on another thing. I’m sure a lot of things they’re facing with the like bringing in cool things, but also fighting gentrification at the same time. So trying to keep like a cool community, but not have it be like a huge corporate type thing. So, but I do I love like theming in a restaurant for sure. And that’s something I’m like, always my eyes are up and I’m looking at the choice of lighting fixtures and how they’re hiding the cord and you know, what kind of hardware they chose, And those are like the fun details, you know.

[00:14:35] CHRIS: I love it. I love, I asked you your favorite types of theme restaurants. You talk about theming, classy professional. You’re talking about like, I know from I don’t know where you’re based in, but I know like New York City there is a city north of here called Hudson, which I think has been sort of like revitalized in the past 10 to 15 years with a lot of artists. The gentrification issue, like you said, is a real thing. But there’s a lot of chefs up there who are like, ‘I can get a big empty warehouse, redo the whole thing in my image. It’s low overhead’. And then, like you say, OK, it’s French food. And they bring in some real muralist who can now theme this whole thing with like scenes of France or paintings that have references to French authors. And it’s all very classy. You like a classy themed restaurant.

[00:15:22] CALLER: In my personal life, yeah. I mean, I’ll enjoy let’s say some like I’m a Margaritaville or whatever. I love going into the bars. Those places have a sloppy marg and like, oh, how did they build this stuff or whatever? But sometimes not always the food. So, yeah. You know where I’m going.

[00:15:45] CHRIS: Hahaha, yeah it’s the experience. Okay, let’s talk. We’re gonna talk about a couple of these things. We’re gonna talk and you’ll tell me if you’ve been to them or not. And I’ll give quick descriptions. I’m not going to dominate this call, but I just… this is a fun topic near and dear to my heart. I’m gonna tell you about some my favorites from over the years. After my junior prom, I went to a place in New York City called Jekyll and Hyde. Are you familiar with Jekyll and Hyde’s?

[00:16:09] CALLER: I am familiar with it. I’ve never been inside. Is that the one that was on Kimmy Schmidt or is that like like the first season? I think one of the characters worked there.

[00:16:18] CHRIS: Oh, they might. I did watch that cause Ellie’s a friend, but I don’t remember if there’s a specific Jekyll and Hyde. It’s a horror themed restaurant where the waiters all have to act spooky and there’s like zombie statues and stuff. You got to be spooky. I like that one. I like that one. Now, there was one that used to be in New York that I was a huge fan of. Also, it occupied prime real estate right next to Rockefeller Center. If you’ve heard of Mars 20, I think it’s Mars 2012 or Mars 2112. Do you know about this?

[00:16:50] CALLER: No, oh, my God. We went there. I went there as a kid and it blew my mind. I was like, this is the best thing. And it has milkshakes in space. This is amazing. I was sitting on alien eggs. Like the little secondary bar with the alien eggs that you could sit on. I was like, we’re never leaving. I want to live here. I think it was like a prime early 2000 opulence of like, with the weird… I remember the stuff on the video screens of like alien news.

[00:17:18] CHRIS: Yes. For anyone listening, this is a restaurant in New York City. One of the culinary hubs of the entire world, inarguably, had a restaurant right in midtown where you would enter and the host would bring you into a little pod that would play a video meant to make you think you were traveling through space to the surface of Mars. And the door would open on the other side. And it was this weird foam… like everything was this red foam and it would be like… You’d get like, you know, like grilled space cheese or it would just be like a real shitty grilled cheese sandwich. And the best part was that the waiters and waitresses had to dress in these like big mascot outfits and they’d be like Captain Ajax. And they weren’t really allowed to speak English and you had to point your menu items. And I remember once, Jekyll and Hyde’s, famously, a lot of actors will work in Jekyll and Hyde’s because you get your equity card, you can join the Stage Actors Union from working at Jekyll and Hyde’s. So a lot of New York actors, when they come and they’re trying to break in on Broadway and off Broadway, before that you can get health insurance through equity, certain restaurants. I remember once asking my foam mascot clad waiter at Mars 2112. Like, do you get equity insurance? And the person inside was like ‘Fuck no! No, don’t bring it up’. And I was like, woah, you’re talking and cursing. OK. Have you ever been to Denver’s infamous Casa Bonita? Are you familiar with Casa Bonita, 

[00:18:45] CALLER: No.

[00:18:47] CHRIS: It was featured on South Park. I’ve wanted to go my whole life. Finally had the pleasure to go last year. I first read about it in the great book, Roadside America. This is a restaurant that very strangely has a large waterfall in the middle and puts on diving shows every 20 minutes where local teens dive set to music and the food is not good.

[00:19:12] CALLER: It’s always so funny with these places of you know… it’s possible to have good food and that I don’t know if one’s cracked the code yet, really.

[00:19:22] CHRIS: Every once in a while an aspiring restauranteur goes ‘well I can either build the 40 foot tall indoor cliff waterfall. Or we can pick up the pace and make sure this food isn’t outright stale’. But you can only have one. 

[00:19:45] CALLER: You can’t have both.

[00:19:46] CHRIS: No way. Now I’m going to name one more that is perhaps the nearest and dearest. I’m praying you’ve been there. And then I stopped dominating this conversation, I’ll hand the reigns back to you. As a New Jersey resident, and this is a franchise, there’s a few of them throughout the country. But the one in Jersey is infamous and beloved amongst my North Jersey peers. Do you know where I’m going with this? One of the ultimate themed eating experiences. Medieval Times! You ever heard of Medieval Times?

[00:20:16] CALLER: Oh, of course! Yeah. Oh, yeah, gosh, I think the first time I went was like a marching band trip. And I’ve been another one, I think it’s called Arabian Nights which is like the same thing, but instead of like, medieval, It’s like an Arabian horse show. And I was a big horse girl as a the kid. So I was like ‘Horses! Yes! With food!’ 

[00:20:47] CHRIS: You’d get to sit there and watch horses… Medieval times, a lot of people know about this one. If you’re not familiar, it’s in Lyndhurst, New Jersey. I’m trying to stifle my laughter just at saying this. It’s shaped like a gigantic castle and it’s a standalone building that’s not part of a strip mall. It’s a pretty sizable castle. And you go inside and you are seated in an indoor battle arena. First you go into a lobby where there’s a bar and a lot of kitsch for sale, but there’s people walking around dressed in medieval garb. You go into this indoor battle arena, there’s six sections, six different colors. Each color has a representative knight who rides a horse around the battle arena and they fight. And there’s a king and a princess who make announcements. You are instructed to call your waitresses ‘wench’, which is not aging well in 2019. I remember as a third grader my aunt and uncle took me in third grade. And this lady had to look at me, an eight year old, in the eye and be like ‘Hi, I’m your wench for the night’. This is not teaching me good lessons. And you eat with your hands. You are given no silverware and they give you baked potatoes and pitchers of water and soup that you drink without a spoon, you just drink from the bowl. And I remember when I was a meat eater still getting either chicken or ribs and it’s terrible food. And we went and brought the whole cast and crew of the Chris Gethard show there last year right before our show ended. And we were cheering on our knight. And then they had a twist in the story where he was like, he got like me Me-Too’d. I forget exactly what it was, but we’d been cheering for this knight and we were disruptive to the point that we probably ruined the show for other people cheering for our knight so hard and picked one of the other six nights and just booed the shit out of them. And then halfway through, our guy started talking to the princess and being like, ‘Your opinion doesn’t matter, woman, don’t talk to me like that’. And we were all like, ‘Wait, wait, we’ve been cheering this guy.’ Weird choice. Modern choice from Medieval Times. Okay. Here’s my favorite thing about Medieval Times. These knights go in there, and you’re a knight. You’re ridin’ horses, people are cheering, screaming for you. You’re throwing roses into the crowd and people are praying they get to catch the rose, wielding this cool weaponry and then at the end of the night you know, you change back into your civilian clothes and you go out the back door and you’re just another asshole in Lyndhurst, New Jersey, with long hair.

[00:23:29] CALLER: ‘I’m Steve now.’

[00:23:29] CHRIS: Exactly, now I’m just Steve again. I’m just a guy with a ponytail and a 2004 Honda Civic. And I guess I’ll just go home, even though my job is to be a literal medieval hero swinging a mace around my head. I love it. Okay. I’ve talked enough about theme restaurants. Thank you for that trip down memory lane. Back to you. So you said you were physically damaged in the course of your work this year. Tell me about that.

[00:23:29] [AD BREAK]

[00:27:09] CHRIS: Back to you. So you said you were physically damaged in the course of your work this year. Tell me about that.

[00:27:20] CALLER: Well, yeah. I had surgery earlier in January, started the new year off, right. Yeah. I herniated a disc in my low back and I don’t know how long I had it, but I’d had the pain for like a year. And it just got to the point that I was having trouble walking, you know, and couldn’t… you know, it was like spending Christmas with the family. And I could barely crack a smile because I was just like in too much pain. And so I’d been doing like, you know, the chiropractors and the yogas and I mean, I still do like majority of that stuff. But I had been taking some pain pills and stuff and getting a few of the different injections they give you for that kind of stuff. But I hadn’t thought out an MRI or anything yet. And so I finally just got to the point. I was like, ‘I need an MRI. I want to know what’s going on’. And yeah, it was it was pretty bad. And so I think it’s like New Year’s Eve I got the diagnosis of a herniated disk and you know, we’re recommending surgery for it. And so but I mean. Yeah. And that that happened then and so and I’m like, still, you know, pretty young. So it was just kind of a moment. And I’ve like had like kind of minor injuries. Like I’ve nailed my hand to a board before and I’ve gotten sick from paint fumes and stuff. So it was like for me, I’m like, that’s minor, whatever it happens. But this one was like, OK, I need, you know, and so I’ve been like still working and hustling and but I’ve been reassessing stuff a bit. And also because I I really felt like I’d got some good momentum going in my career. And I was just talking about this last night. I feel like right now it’s probably one of the first times in my life I’ve felt like really confident in myself and my abilities and… so it’s yeah, it’s it’s like, you know, definitely scary to feel like that could maybe be taken away or you have to reassess that. And, you know, with these kind of industries, it can have really weird hours, really long hours. They’re very demanding physically.

[00:29:42] CHRIS: Yeah. I feel like I know enough about what you do. And like you said, you’ve done some film and TV. So I know there’s a Venn diagram for anybody listening, they might be going, ‘Well wait. You said you do a lot of painting and stuff like that. I bet you can work around it’. Like the sense I get is you’re working more on the side of things. That’s like, oh, no, we have one week to build this and we’re bringing in the materials. This is carrying stuff. This is getting up on ladders. This is physical work.

[00:30:10] CALLER: Yeah. And I mean I’ve I’ve lucked out so far in that I’m getting better about asking for help. And also like especially being a woman. You’re always kind of trying to show off how strong you are. And because people want to kind of you know, you get a lot of like ‘sweethearts’ and like, you know, ‘oh, sweetie, can you lift that?’ And so I’m always like, ‘I can do it!’ So I would try to show off a little bit some good body strength. But now I’m having to like eat my words a little bit and be like, ‘can I have some help moving this?’ and be a little smarter about how I’m lifting. But thankfully, I’ve been doing more of like some prop detailed stuff, so it’s been a little like, you know, standing at a table with an object instead of, you know, doing an entire wall, as for right now. But it’s always kind of like in the back of my mind of like, you know, I told my physical therapist, ‘I could be getting on a ladder or a lift soon. Can we practice how to do this properly so I don’t hurt myself?’`

[00:30:18] CHRIS: And, you know, that’s brutal. That puts a lot of self-doubt in your head. My my wife was a performer, and I don’t want to tell her story for her. But she had a back injury. Back injuries are a particular brand of nasty because they just kind of linger and get in your head. That’s what I’ve taken away from seeing one in action.

[00:31:34] CALLER: Yeah. And they they affect everything, really. You know, it’s it’s kind of like if your arms kind of hurting, it’s like you can use the other arm or work around it. But especially with my back, it’s like you know, like everything is painful. And then you all the all you want to do is lie down. But then they’re like, you can’t do that. You have to keep moving. It’s like one injury where they’re like, you can’t just lie down. You have to like stay upright and keep moving. Bed rest is the worst thing for it.

[00:32:06] CHRIS: Yeah. But then all of a sudden you have one of those days where you like. And now my hip has gone out because my body’s trying to adjust around my back. So now I guess I’ll just have one hip to work with today because my back is.. it’s the epicenter of a lot of things with your body.

[00:32:26] CALLER: Yeah. I was making a lot of jokes about becoming a bionic person or like getting a service animal that would like compensate for me.

[00:32:35] CHRIS: Right. 

[00:32:36] CALLER: If it ever came to that point. Really it hasn’t.

[00:32:38] CHRIS: Right, right. Like you just go out and get a service silverback gorilla that can climb things. 

[00:30:44] CALLER: Oh yeah for sure

[00:32:46] CHRIS: And install stuff and carry heavy stuff. Now can I ask you a question? I luckily, knock on wood, have not had like a catastrophic lingering injury. I’d be scared to go on the pain pills at this time in history. Were you scared about that?

[00:33:07] CALLER: Yeah, it was… well, so thankfully for me, I haven’t had to go on opioids at all. 

[00:33:14] CHRIS: Oh, good. 

[00:33:15] CALLER: I was I was offered them and they gave me the pills and everything. But I was able to get by with muscle relaxers and and then just like good old Advil. So I have like a backup prescription of all those different kinds of, you know, just in case, especially if I’ve worked like a long 10, 12 hour shift, sometimes, maybe this is bad, I’ll preemptively take them because I know I’ll start to feel a little sore the next day, But then the minute I’m feeling normal, I drop it and I’m like, you know. I just feel better when I’m taking them. I don’t feel like any kind of head stuff or floaty-ness. So thankfully, yeah, I haven’t had to go that route. Just to make the story more interesting, my mom and I had surgery two weeks apart from each other. And my mom had a history as of being a nurse, and so she was like, ‘we’re not doing the opioids!” She was, you know, a little scared about me even doing back surgery. It’s kind of like a hotly… a lot of back stuff, especially like chiropractors, you know, it’s it’s a hotly contended thing within the medical community. But, you know, once I got the diagnosis and had the MRI and everything, and we did our research and stuff was like, OK, this is the right decision for me. You know, a lot of stuff on the internet will just be like, ‘Don’t ever do back surgery’. But I feel like, you know, it doesn’t take into account the person what has happened to their body and, you know, the kind of work that I’ve done and stuff.

[00:34:59] CHRIS: Yeah. Yeah, I know. And my my history with substances, if they put me on opioids… game over. I would have to figure out how to take the pain because I think I’m built in a bad way for… Then when I was on Adderall, I went too nuts. I went nuts. Had to get off the Adderall quick. OK. Now talk me through this. And again, I saw I’ve seen, you know, someone extraordinarily close to me deal with their own version of this. You do work. You’re proud of your work. You’re catching momentum in your work. You’ve also mentioned that you’re working in a field where being a woman, you feel like you’re proving something. You have to demonstrate your strength, for better or for worse. This work is now becoming harder at a young age. How do you reconcile that sort of feeling of the pride you take in your work, the gratification, the physical limitations. Are you worried that it might be something that goes away or are you going to find a way around it?

[00:36:03] CALLER: Yeah, that’s that’s kind of like the one of the forefront things in my mind that I’m like kind of always circling around is what does this mean for the future? And, you know, and am I going to have to move over to like a more design line of work or position where it won’t be as difficult. So far, I’ve been recovering really well, like my physical therapist is very impressed. And yeah, so far, I haven’t run into a situation where I’m completely unable to perform my job. But yeah, I mean I don’t want to degenerate further and have something like this happen again, even if I’m feeling great right now. And what does this mean for the future? You know, I’d like to be able to enjoy my body in the future. So, yeah. I’m thinking about it for sure. And going, well, maybe, you know, this is the time to start. I’ve been doing this kind of manual labor-esque stuff for a while and either, you know, having to set some tougher boundaries for myself of like not working too many hours in one day or pushing it too much, or do I need to move over to stuff that would have me be more at a desk. But I mean, I don’t know. Then sometimes you hear the stories of people that have gotten a herniated disc in their neck, just from like looking at a computer. And here you know, you start being like, nothing’s safe. I mean, that’s true in life.

[00:37:39] CHRIS: But you might just get carpal tunnel if you work in a computer like this. Do you think.. it brings up a thing I think about a lot that I feel with myself and that I saw in my father that he and I have spoken about as I’ve gotten older, I kind of… You ever feel like the way that we, especially as Americans, kind of stake our self-esteem in work accomplishments. It’s a little backwards. Dangerous at the very least.

[00:38:15] CALLER: Yeah, I feel that a lot and I definitely grew up in like a very pro capitalist household. And yeah, I’m very work-centric and pride myself on my work. And I used to joke that, like the idea of like getting fired from a job was like scarier to me than like getting dumped or something.

[00:38:41] CHRIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:38:44] CALLER: I’ve had like panic attacks that I worried I wasn’t doing a good enough job and that people then, you know, thought I was I was bad or I was going to get fired or something and… yeah. And especially with, you know, the dialog with a lot of things in the world now about like reexamining our culture of you know, minimum wage and how many hours people are having to work and what’s humane and everything. And the toxicity of some of that kind of pro-capitalism rhetoric in some ways, and especially it gets caught up a lot with people that I work with too where it’s kind of showboating of like, you know, ‘what’s your worst injury?’ or ‘what’s the heaviest thing you can lift?’ or, ‘oh, I worked five jobs at once’ or you know, ‘I only sleep two hours a night’ and that kind of thing. Yeah. It’s tough to parse. But I mean, I definitely feel some of that anxiety as I’m getting older and a little more confident myself is subsiding. You know, I guess I don’t feel like I have to prove as much if that makes sense. I don’t have to, you know, overextend myself to the point of hurting myself to prove that I I have value in the workplace or value in what I do. And that there’s so many different people overseeing projects. Our big thing is a lot of people like to come in and see, especially they’ll go into a space that’s already been completed and talk shit on the work that’s in there. The mural or how something was installed or whatever. And the big thing I’ve learned is knowing what the behind the scenes mess of a project is and how many things can go wrong and how many different notes you can get that to you don’t make any sense, but your boss is telling you to do it. And so I’m always going like, I don’t know what that artist had to deal with to you know, put that up there. I don’t necessarily think that makes them bad at what they do. It’s more than likely, you know, the person above them that was like, you know, ‘I want it this way!’ or ‘We’re out of money’.

[00:41:09] CHRIS: Yeah, you do what you gotta do. Pay those bills. I I think that’s one of my big commitments to myself moving forward. Figure out how to stake my self-esteem in the non-work stuff. My whole adult life… this scramble. My TV show got cancelled, can I sell another one? How many downloads is the podcast getting? Okay I go on the road and I can sell this many tickets. Can I double that within the next five years? Maybe I just need to find my self-esteem in the fact that I think I treat people pretty good. And I try to do right by those around me. Maybe that’s the more important thing. Trying to learn that as I head towards the latter half of my life. But who knows? Easier said than done. Easier said than done.

[00:42:07] CALLER: That’s something… Yeah. This concept we’re talking about it… I’m sure you’re thinking about that a lot with like being a new father of, you know, being a workaholic and a dad and a new dad. And like, how how am I going to proceed with my career but be, you know, there for my kid? And also, I don’t want to, you know, wear myself out physically or emotionally or mentally.

[00:42:34] CHRIS: Yeah, absolutely. And like, what’s the version of myself that I want this kid to know? And it’s funny. I have sometimes talked publicly about my relationship with my dad. And I just want to say… he is the best. He’s a great dad and he and I are very close and we’re closer now than we’ve ever been. But his relationship with work has rubbed off on me. I always say my brother got my father’s brains. Those guys.. they’re both so, so smart. And I’m pretty smart. But I got my dad’s work ethic. And that’s part of why I’ve been able to kind of like scrap out this career that I’m pretty proud of. Even though I think publicly I’ve taken my hits and keep standing. That’s because of my dad. That’s because my dad taught me how to just like you just keep running through the wall like the Kool-Aid man until the till the wall falls down. But it is like… it’s funny. I’ve talked with him so much, especially since I’ve gotten older. It’s funny having the kid, I remember realizing, oh, he was just scared. He wasn’t like… he wasn’t trying to go accomplished so much to prove he was a bad ass or to like show that he is the one he should be getting the promotion. I didn’t realize this, my mom told me that when my parents got married they had six hundred dollars between them in the bank account. This dude was running scared. And it’s funny, one thing that one thing that my parents pointed out to me… my aunt and uncle told me that their family had an intervention when they said they were going to try for a second child and said, ‘You should not do this. You will be in the poorhouse. You’ll be doing a disservice to this young family. You don’t have money.’ This was about me being created. It was weird to hear.

[00:44:28] CALLER: Oh my god.

[00:44:29] CHRIS: Yeah, that basically my family intervened to try to stop me from existing. That’s wild, wild to hear. But one thing that my parents pointed out is like, you know, especially in the past three or four years, like I’ve I’ve done all right financially. And I think I can be a little more chill. I can be a little more chill, at least for the first handful of years for this kid’s life. I think it might be really good for him to see an example of someone who’s willing to maybe be a little chill. Put that stuff on the back-burner. Find a little more time to just hang out with this little guy. But who knows? Have you ever been to the Stardust Cafe, the Stardust Diner, Stardust Diner in New York City? You know that one?

[00:45:18] CALLER: Oh, gosh. Is that the one that’s in Spiderman? No, no.. oh, it’s like moon dance or something. I think. I don’t know… Maybe I’m wrong. I’m sure listeners are screaming now. Yeah. MJ worked at a diner that has a very sparkly sign.

[00:45:39] CHRIS: No, the Stardust is one where the waiters are trained singers and dancers. And very often like on a pretty rotating, pretty constant rotating basis, they jump up on top of the tables and they will sing pop standards, show tunes. I did not know this, so I was once looking for a place to have a business meeting with someone I was working with. And I always love a diner. I’m a Jersey guy. So let’s go to a diner. Diners are real laid back and I wound up having a a business meeting with someone while the waiters were like jumping up and singing Whitney Houston songs and doing choreographed dances. And the thing that’s so heartbreaking about the Stardust Diner is that it is right in the heart of the Broadway section of New York. So you’re right in there. And you know that most of these people have probably moved to New York to pursue a Broadway dream. And they’re so close, they are so close. They’re right there like the Winter Garden Theater. It’s a couple blocks away and you’re singing on a table in the diner. I love stories that… like the humanity of it. And I don’t judge. You’ve got to scrap it out like I’ve been saying. Anyway, that’s another good theme restaurant that I like.

[00:46:54] CALLER: Oh my god, well, you know, I’m going to be in New York like pretty soon for my birthday. And so now… do I have to check all these places out?

[00:47:03] CHRIS: You know what one I’ve never been to… Ninja Sushi. That’s another one I’ve heard about where there were servers are ninjas who drop down from the ceiling or from hidden caverns and passageways to serve you sushi while dressed as ninjas. That’s another one in New York. But I think that’s weirdly way downtown, right? That one’s down near like Wall Street. Like why is there a their ninja restaurant down near Wall Street? Anyway.

[00:47:26] CALLER: It’s like Wall Street bros are like going for the ninja sushi? Having power lunches?

[00:47:39] CHRIS: Yeah, what exactly is going on with it? Yeah, we looked it up. It’s down in Tribeca. Tribeca is pretty far south and kind of like a trendsetter neighborhood. Why is that the place where you can go and get served by ninjas? Have ninjas serve you your food.

[00:47:49] CALLER: Well I feel like that themed pop up bar thing is happening more and more kind of everywhere. Yeah. So who knows? Maybe like, you know, we went through our phases of the farm to table reclaimed wood. You know, we’re it we’re in like a weird time culturally with like the the the strength of the IP, you know the intellectual property as with every other Game of Thrones and comic books and stuff so maybe the new era of restaurants is everything is IP related.

[00:48:29] CHRIS: I like that. If you could design… okay if you could design like you mentioned a theme restaurant… you like a good one with good lighting, with murals. Classy. Restrained, refined. If I could design my own themed restaurant, I would make it themed to feel like you are a patient in an insane asylum and you when you go there the hostess, before they seat you, the hostess straps you into a straitjacket. So you have to eat by just like mashing your face into your plate, trying to grip your cup with your teeth and tipping it back to drink. There’s lunatics who have who have broken loose, who are running roughshod. There’s people getting electroshock therapy right in front of your eyes. Totally insensitive, disrespectful to the mental health industry. I’ve been such a public champion for mental health treatment, but it’ll be like a nightmare vision of a 1930s mental hospital. That would be my ultimate themed restaurant. 

[00:49:30] CHRIS: (Beginning of ad break) I want to let you know that even as this was coming out of my mouth, I understood that the coolest thing to make fun of. As someone who has the issues that I have so publicly spoken about. Did you just mock the idea of mental hospital? Not great. And demonizes the whole idea of mental health industry, which has improved leaps bounds over the past decades. Do I know that? Yes, I know that. My bad. OK. Hopefully the jokes make it funny enough that between that and the apologies, you’ll let me go. Anyway, the momentum is broken. We got ads. Check them out. We got promo codes. Use them. We’ll be right back.

[00:50:05] [AD BREAK] 

[00:51:27] CHRIS: It’ll be like a nightmare vision of like a 1930s mental hospital. That would be my ultimate themed restaurant. You call it the crazy house. 

[00:51:38] CALLER: Yeah. Or the loony bin?

[00:51:40] CHRIS: The loony bin. Yeah. And then like the dishes… you can get things like cheesy tots, like that’s the type of stuff they’ll have at a restaurant like that. Go ahead and get some cheesy tots.

[00:51:53] CALLER: Actually like as you’re describing this, like one of those big things, like what’s trendy right now. A big thing is those places where you can go like break plates and stuff.

[00:52:01] CHRIS: I’ve heard about these. 

[00:52:04] CALLER: Yeah. What I’m hearing is like a good, like, let’s bridge these two things together because, you know, like if you’re going for like most offensive sterotype of a mental patient, they want to break some plates. They want to go insane.

[00:52:17] CHRIS: Yes. 

[00:52:19] CALLER: So I, you know, get your food and then when you’re done with the food, you can just like chuck that plate across the room.

[00:52:24] CHRIS: Yes. Give in to your most unhinged impulses for one night. You’re allowed to smash anything made of glass. It is not just encouraged, but required that you flip your table over on your way out the door. And yeah, the after dinner mints are delivered to you like the way they used to hand out those pills through the little window in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. Maybe that’s it! Maybe it’s called the Cuckoo’s Nest.

[00:52:50] CALLER: Yeah. There you go. 

[00:52:55] CHRIS: What do you think? If I can get the investment capital, will you come build the Cuckoo’s Nest? An insane asylum themed..

[00:53:01] CALLER: I will be all over that in two seconds. You have no idea. Let’s get the elevations up. Let’s look up the break… you know, all the shattered glass places that are safe, shattered glass. Make it happen.

[00:53:19] CHRIS: So what else? You’re trying to heal up. You got this cool career trying to make sure that you can keep your head above water and pursuing it. You feel like you’re… Do you feel like you’re through the thick of it with the back injury or is it still like a day to day thing that’s messing with you?

[00:53:36] CALLER: Knock on wood I think I’m through the thick of it. It was like touch and go for a minute, though, because, like, I came back to work and I think I was there for two weeks and I ended up pinching a nerve in my neck. And yeah, it was like ‘It’s the whole back. Oh, my God.’ And I was freaking out. And, you know, they were like. It happens. And I went on more intense muscle relaxers and took the rest of that week off. And then even funnier, I,, just a calamity of errors, is I, you know, wake up Monday morning and I’m like, okay. Like, not a hundred percent, but I think, you know, I’m ready to go back to work. And I’m like, let me take a nice hot shower in the morning and stretch out. And that’ll make me like ready for the day and I can do this. And I’m in the shower and I’m stretching and really get deep neck stretches. And I’m like, I feel like a little dizzy. And so I have a chair in my shower just, you know, with the bending and stuff. I need a little assistance. And so I sit down and then next thing I know, my boyfriend’s waking me up because I passed out and then hit my eye on the edge of the shower and so my eye’s bleeding and my nose is bleeding. And I have to rush to the E.R. and it looks great when your boyfriend’s bringing his bloody crying girlfriend with a big black eye into the E.R.. Yeah. Everything was fine, thank God. Like they did a C.T. scan and everything. And they said it’s just like a perfect storm of like, you know, hot shower in the morning and in there too long, you’re dehydrated and you have low blood pressure early in the morning. And then if you hold those neck stretches too long you can kind of put yourself into a falcon grip. And apparently, all those things combined is what I did to myself. 

[00:55:23] CHRIS: What’s a falcon grip?

[00:55:26] CALLER: Like… in the movies where they come up behind you and they pinch the nerves in your neck in the right way and you drop.

[00:55:35] CHRIS: The Vulcan neck pinch? The thing Spock does?

[00:55:37] CALLER: Is that right? 

[00:55:44] CHRIS: I looked this up and is it also called a falcon grip? Well, when you Google the phrase falcon grip, the first thing that comes up is best glock accessories at a website I don’t want to even plug. Having a solid grip on your glock is important for shooting fast and accurately. Purchase falcon grips today. Very second thing is called Talon Grips for a glock. See, I think you’re thinking of the Vulcan neck pinch. Everything about falcon grips is about glocks.

[00:56:19] CALLER: Haha, if nothing else from this call I’ve learned that and I’m adjusting the story from now on.

[00:56:25] CHRIS: I think you mean the Vulcan neck pinch, which is a Star Trek reference.

[00:56:34] CALLER: The good old Vulcan neck pinch… compressing all the stuff, all those arteries and nerves in the neck there and then just oop, you’re out.

[00:56:43] CHRIS: Yes. The Vulcan nerve pinch I believe. I’m much more of a Star Wars guy than a Star Trek guy.

[00:56:49] CALLER: Yeah, same here.

[00:56:51] CHRIS: Yeah, my dad loves Star Trek. My dad has like an encyclopedic knowledge of Star Trek. I’m a Star Wars guy. What can I say? I’m a rebel.

[00:57:01] CALLER: Oh, is that a thing? Like my son, I can’t connect with him over this thing. It’s so close. But like, you know, so far at the same time.

[00:57:10] CHRIS: So close. Although I do remember he was so excited when we were… When I was a kid I think the first movie I ever remember him bringing me to was Star Trek four, which was the one with the whales. So I still have a lot of fondness for that movie and Star Trek’s fine. But the whales one… I always liked that my dad brought me to see that. Yeah, so we have 13 minutes left. What else… I will say. I really appreciate this call. Thank you for letting me get some good fond reminiscences of ridiculous theme restaurants while also filling me in on your injury, harrowing stretch of life. What else would you like to talk about with 13 minutes left?

[00:57:50] CALLER: I’m down with 13 minutes left. There’s so many there’s so many possibilities. Oh, gosh. Well. And it’s so fun to talk to you about stuff. I so badly want to like get into more specific details of projects I’ve been on, but then I’m worried to take away the anonymity of things.

[00:58:08] CHRIS: Yeah, that’s a thing where if you talk too much shit word could spread, right?You’re a freelancer, effectively, right?

[00:58:17] CALLER: Freelancer effectively yeah. And yeah, it’s not even… it’s more just the projects are cool and they’re exciting. But yeah it’s but it’s funny because even, you know, people always think like film and TV. But there’s like niche upon niche of markets the more… And you know what’s even funnier is how kind of off the books things are in terms of I just get calls randomly and I go to blank warehouses and I meet people and they give me an idea of what they want. And then you’re you’re at it and then you get a check. Usually it’s just like handed to you, sometimes it’s mailed, and then you’re on your way and sometimes you bump into them. Yeah, it’s a weird… But I do love it. I’ve been lucky that the kind of the main market that I’m in is very friendly and very welcoming. And a lot of people are really trying to… there’s a lot of good like, you know, networking events that of… I mean it’s true, like the networking aspect is like such a huge part of it of making or breaking it. And I’ve just, I’ve been very fortunate. And if you’re a fun person to hang out with at a restaurant, then usually they want to work with you. And that’s usually what gets me hired versus what’s in my portfolio. And a lot of times stuff that I’ve worked on, I can’t put in my portfolio because of, you know, NDA and things of that nature. 

[00:59:45] CHRIS: Yeah. And you were saying too like with TV, I think people think of TV as glamorous and I’m sure that the set designers for Game of Thrones have like a fun, limitless budget where they can dream up whatever they want. But I would say probably 98 percent of television is like, you gotta… We need this and we want it to look great and we’ll give you eleven dollars and that’s it. And now you gotta drive… you’re going to drive to a junkyard we found in Cherry Hill, New Jersey, because we heard it hasn’t been picked clean yet by everyone else. Go find us everything we need. You got 48 hours. That’s most… most of TV is kind of like that.

[01:00:29] CALLER: I want to say probably like at least 90 percent of it is that way. You know, I haven’t been on… I’ve been on big budget project, but I haven’t been on like a big budget, like a Marvel film or anything like that. So, yeah, I don’t know if it’s run differently. But like I mean, a lot of time what I’ve been now saying to people for in quick interview situations is like what your what are your strengths? And I was like ‘thriving in chaos’, like just throw me onto a pile of garbage. And I often get a lot of, you know, I if I’m lucky, I get a reference photo of what they’re looking for. But a lot of the times it’s a, you know, a pixilated mess that they just got off Google really quickly. But I’m tooting my own horn a lot on this call that I’ve been able to interpret going like ‘I think I know what they want’. Just really quickly be like it, you know, is this it? Is this it? No. Is this it? Oh, that’s it. OK. Go, go, go, go, go.

[01:01:29] CHRIS: Yeah. Yeah. That’s the real skill. That’s the real skill. To make something look like it’s cost a million dollars when it’s held together with Scotch tape and chewing gum. That’s a very valuable skill the especially in TV and film. I would imagine restaurants, they don’t want that as much. But TV and film that is an asset.

[01:01:53] CALLER: Or you know, if it’s made with glue or gum and stuff, but it’s the way it’s installed, it will last forever. And it’s always amazed… the part that’s always funny, is you think you’ve anticipated what could break or what could go wrong and objects will fall apart on a fundamental level that you didn’t foresee somehow. And you’re like, oh, OK. That’s another way. I didn’t I didn’t know that could happen. Let me reassess that. And you know, all the different… Another type of glue. Let me try another type of a hardener. Let me try another type of aircraft cable. We throw all those together at once. And then I think I oftentimes tend to like over work something in terms of wanting it to like… we do primer and then another layer of paint and then another layer of paint. And then I’ve given myself five extra steps that I didn’t need to because I’m like, I’m trying to make it durable. Oh, my God.

[01:03:06] CHRIS: And then it’s 4:15 in the morning. You have a production meeting at 6:00 and you’re like, why, why?

[01:03:12] CALLER: Why did I do this to myself?

[01:03:14] CHRIS: But then they come in and then, oh, my God, you crushed it. It’s better than we thought. And you’re like, fuck, yeah, I’m the shit. Sorry Sally.

[01:03:22] CALLER: And you know what’s funny is a thing like….building some confidence in myself is like a new… since that’s a new sensation. My kind of like inner anxiety brain that’s talking to me is always then trying to be like you’re being cocky or being a jerk. You know? You need to walk it back. And well there’s always that fine line of like you’re never done learning and there’s always more you can learn. And there’s always people that have more experience and it’s valuable to listen to them and learn what you can. But yeah, that’s like a big thing I feel in myself is… And I have, you know, kind of asking people like, you know, am I being cocky? Like, let me know if I’m coming off like a jerk or… And I haven’t gotten that feedback at all. But yeah, just like… The inner inner head dialog used to be like more of the imposter stuff. Of you don’t know what you’re doing and they’re going to find out and you’re going to be gone. But now it’s like, you know, you’re not as good as you think you’re are. You’re like, oh, I guess I have like a begrudging old man in my head. That’s like ‘alright kid. Like you got some stuff in there. But like, take it easy. You’re not as good as you think.’

[01:04:46] CHRIS: I know that feeling. I waver only between self-pity and narcissism when it comes to my work. I’m either like I do the most innovative stuff anyone’s ever done in comedy. Or I’m like, no one likes it. Why did I waste my whole life? Those are my two extremes. There is never a part of me that’s like I’ve made some funny stuff. Pretty cool. Always with the inner monologue that is not being kind. I like those restaurants where the whole thing is that the staff are dickheads. You ever been to one of those where the people are just mean to you?

[01:05:26] CALLER: Well, you started talking about the diner and I thought that’s kind of where that was going. I don’t know if Mel’s in L.A… wasn’t that part of their gimmick, the Mel Diner in L.A.?

[01:05:38] CHRIS: I’ve never been to Mel’s. I have to check that out next time I’m out there. There’s one in Chicago.

[01:05:46] CALLER: Yeah. Well, that’s part of their whole gimmick is like it’s like, alright sweetie, what do you want? Did you wash your hands when you went to the bathroom?

[01:05:54] CHRIS: So they do like the old timey… They do like an old timey vibe, but it just turns into like mansplaining and subtle misogyny? That type of thing… like calling you sweetie all the time?

[01:06:05] CALLER: No, I think it’s like it’s an old… you know, if you’re going for like potentially offensive terminology, like an old broad. Calls everyone, sweetie and then she’s, you know, acting like, you know, some stereotypical fashioning of a mom who’s being a nag or something. It’s like have you ever been to what’s called the Primetime Cafe down at Hollywood Studios in Orlando?

[01:06:31] CHRIS: Uh…no I don’t think so. Though I’ve been there a number of times.

[01:06:36] CALLER: Yeah. It’s called the Primetime cafe and it’s 50’s influenced, like 50’s style. But you’re supposed to be in like a 50’s home. So instead of it being a diner, it’s like it’s you know, I went there with my parents and they’re like, oh my God, this is like what our kitchen looked like and this is what our living room looked like. And they have all the old vintage TVs like in every corner of the restaurant playing all the old sitcoms and shows from the time. And so your waitress is your assigned mom for the meal. And, you know, she… So I think they when they call your name like, you know, if your last name is Jones. They’re like ‘the Jones kid!’. They sit you down and kind of give you a hard time the entire time that you’re eating there. But, you know, it’s always like super packed of course.

[01:07:34] CHRIS: Disney World really manages to walk the Stepford Wives line just on the comfortable side of a line. Two steps on the comfortable side. There’s a few things… In your line of work is a theme park… Is that a good… is that a thing people aim for is that just super brutal? Because as far as building like fantasy scapes and themed stuff, I would imagine there’s endless work there.

[01:07:54] CALLER: Yeah. Well so… predominantly I end up working in theme parks. So that’s like my main line of work. 

[01:08:02] CHRIS: What!

[01:08:04] CALLER: Yeah, it’s absolutely.

[01:08:04] CHRIS: You’re just revealing this now? That’s the info you were trying to hide. That’s the info you’re trying to hide.

[01:08:10] CALLER: You know, and you’ve warn me down. But no I always… like how much… but yeah, that’s the main gag, man.

[01:08:17] CHRIS: That’s rad! I love it. I love it. So it’s like we’re building this… We’re building this thing and the entry way needs to look like old miner’s cave. I think that’s…

[01:08:30] Oh, gosh, 

[01:08:30] CHRIS: That’s fun!

[01:08:32] CALLER: I want to tell you so bad. One thing I’ve been doing, because I know you personally would probably be really into it.

[01:08:40] CHRIS: Are you working on Galaxy’s Edge? Are you working on Star Wars? You’re not allowed… You’ve signed a million NDAs. You can’t even tell me if you have.

[01:08:47] CALLER: I can’t… Yeah, exactly. I can’t say anything.

[01:08:51] CHRIS: Ohh!! No, you don’t understand. I want to stay in that hotel. You’re working on that hotel that makes you feel like you’re living in Star Wars, aren’t you? You can’t say… 

[01:09:01] CALLER: No… Oh my god no…

[01:09:01 CHRIS: Goddamnit, You read about that hotel, right? “Read about it” i.e you’re building it by hand. And that whole Star Wars world, they’re not even going to sell Coke products that say Coke on them. They’re making up their own written language where you can tell it’s Coke from the branding and the color scheme. But it won’t even say Coke. You feel like you’re in Star Wars. Ooh.

[01:09:27] CALLER: What’s funny is like with that, I heard that was like a big battle back when they were like, I don’t know. I just heard stories like..

[01:09:30] CHRIS: Oh you’ve heard…

[01:09:33] CALLER: the Harry Potter stuff that J.K. Rowling was like, no Coke. Like, I don’t want Coke. There’s no Coke in Harry Potter and that… So that was. Yeah. Big thing we had to deal with.

[01:09:45] CHRIS: Are you really telling me with two minutes left that you work in a theme park specifically on stuff that I would be obsessed over and now with 30 seconds left I never get to know if it’s like Star Wars or Marvel or what. Because based on the things you know about me, it’s something like that.

[01:10:03] CALLER: … Yeah and I can’t talk about it. 

[01:10:08] CHRIS: Oh my… ugh… -Gethard audibly takes off glasses- What a tease.

[01:10:11] CALLER: It’s so frustrating.

[01:10:03] CHRIS: What a tease. You’re working on the Star Wars stuff. You’re working on… and you could have told me everything. I want to go so bad. I’m going later this year. I gotta. Dress up the little kid as Yoda and bring him down there wear him like a backpack, while I’m dressed like Luke. 

[01:10:26] CALLER: Oh, my God. Please wear him like a backpack. It’s so great.

[01:10:29] CHRIS: Thank you for talking. UGH, what a great tease at the end. I’ve never been blue balled harder than this! [ring]

[01:10:43] CHRIS: Caller, how could you do that? It was… you’re working on Galaxy’s Edge… you’re working on Star Wars Galaxies Edge, and that whole time you were in your head going ‘should I just spill the beans?’ And I should’ve put the screws to you. Would’ve been the most downloaded episode of all time. All Star Wars freaks would have downloaded it. It’s gonna be so cool. Thank you caller for calling. All jokes aside, thank you for a cool conversation. Thank you, Jared in the booth. I’d thank Harry, but he’s off in LA like a hot shot right now. Thank you to Justin Linville. Thank you Shellshag for the music. If you want to know more about what I’m up to- Chris Geth.com. If you like the show… go subscribe on Apple podcast. Rate/review. It really helps when you do. Thanks so much for listening.

[01:11:40] CHRIS: Next time on Beautiful Anonymous an extremely laid back conversation about some extremely not laid back things.

[NEXT EPISODE PREVIEW]

[01:11:53] CALLER: You know, I just feel like I still don’t know what I’m doing and… does anyone know? I mean, I guess I don’t know. 

[01:12:00] CHRIS: Nah, definitely not. 

[01:11:53] CALLER: And like.. Yeah. Like when my daughter’s friends’ parents are also just kind of winging it. I’m like ‘hey, I like you.’.

[01:12:14] CHRIS: Any time I meet someone who seems to express that like no, I’ve got a pretty figured out. I assume that they’re a broken sociopath. I assume that on this inside they are craziest person I’ve ever been around. 

[01:12:28] CALLER: That is the only explanation. 

[01:12:29] CHRIS: Yeah. That’s next time on Beautiful Anonymous.